Find My Way Back to You
by SecretLifeofWords
Summary: AU: Rachel thought she had everything figured out as she finished her final month of high school. That was until she met a charming older woman that changed everything. This story explores Rachel's introduction into dating a woman, telling her best friend, and finding out what happens when not everyone supports her self discovery.
1. Chapter 1

**Prologue:**

The icy cold water smacks me back into consciousness. I gasp in automatically and begin choking on water and on something else, something coppery; it tastes like blood. My eyes flash open and I can see the outline of a vehicle a few feet away from me, sinking deeper into the cloudy water. The headlights illuminate the murky water like little sinking beacons.

I can still see the outline of the driver buckled into the front seat.

My mind feels as muddy as the water, and my body takes over, instinctively swim toward the surface. A white-hot, searing pain rips through me, sending sparks over my eyes as I attempt to move my left arm in the water. My clothes feel like cement weights and my chest is burning for air. But the sinking vessel is so close; I can still see it... Before I can process any further I'm above the water level, gasping for breath, crying out in pain because breathing feels like dying right now. The tail lights and back end of the car are still above the water. I splash towards it, agonizingly moving my right arm and legs to get to the driver.

Then everything goes black.


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: Hey guys, so, this is AU, like really AU. Rachel is a little sassy and athletic, has straight parents, and is sort of lost in her future aspirations. Keep an**

**open mind, it's a fun story. :) Enjoy.**

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**Chapter One: Day of Change**

BEEP, BEEP, BEEEEEP, BEEEEEEP, BEEEEEEEEP!

Ugh, it can't be morning already; I groan and throw my arm over my face. I have one of those annoying alarm clocks that gets louder and longer with every unanswered alert. Usually it takes six or seven screaming noises to 1) locate the alarm clock; 2) hit the correct button; and 3) process that it is morning and I set the alarm for a reason. The reason has been the same Monday through Friday for the past four years- I only have two more months of high school before I'm free-just a few short months of work and play before I jaunt off to college and never look back.

I glance over at the uniform laid out on my desk before begrudgingly crawling out from beneath the covers. The freshly pressed and starched dress shirt lies across the pleated skirt and monogrammed sweater, taunting me. While it has made my clothing decisions very easy over the past few years, I'm ready to retire the plaid and cardigan ensemble once and for all. My mother insisted that I leave the comfortable familiarity of my public education to become a uniformed drone at St. Balthazar's Preparatory High School. Uprooting someone's life from a major, bustling middle school for a tiny Catholic school was bad enough, without the added fact that I'm Jewish. We are not a practicing religious family or anything, but the transition from free spirited public education to that of strict, private school was a culture shock to say the least. Thankfully I'm ilariously charming and sarcastic- oh and a decent athlete otherwise I would not have fit in so well, me thinks.

My head is throbbing as I swing my legs over the side of the bed and rub my eyes a little too aggressively. Ouch. This week has been absolute agony to get through. It seemed like every time I had a free moment I was suddenly bogged down with work or homework or some party celebrating one of my classmate's college acceptance letters. I definitely should not have gone out last night (after curfew) and absolutely should not have finished my night with an ice luge of tequila (because this is never a good idea, ever). Also, I should have consumed more food than liquid, for sure, because I feel like garbage and it's a Thursday.

By the time I stagger to the shower, I'm already fifteen minutes behind schedule. It wouldn't be so bad except after school today is my third to last week at my forced "work camp" after school and this lingering headache is not helping my mood or speed one bit. My brother fifteen year old brother Cody goes out of his way to point out my sluggishness and intentionally moves the chair so that I trip over it and spill the contents of my cereal bowl everywhere. Ugh.

"Dane texted you." He snickered and went back to plowing the Cheerios down his throat in a disgusting display of gross boy-ness.

I shove him after I finish cleaning up the milk mess, "Stop looking at my phone, ass."

"Whatever, Rach. Geez, someone woke up on the wrong side of the bed today…"

I resist the urge to dump the remaider of the milk from my bowl on his head and reach for some coffee instead. My phone has three text messages from Dane. Today is not my day. Dane and I have "dated" on and off for a few months. But dating is sort of a generous term. We were more friends with benefits until we weren't. And we currently aren't even friends. So, I just ignore his messages as usual and grab my bag before trudging to my car, coffee in hand with some toast I stole from Cody's plate, much to his annoyingly voiced disapproval.

The line to get into the school parking lot is always double the amount of students that actually attend this school, so I illegally pull into the "out" ramp and quickly park as close to the street as possible before a militant parking attendant in a nun's habit assaults my car. I have little patience for their rules any more. Nothing has really changed per say, except, well, I guess, me. I can't seem to be enthusiastic about much these days; the prospect of college is very exciting, but even that feels like its eons away from where I am now.

I can't help but laugh at the underclassmen banging their heads on their steering wheels as they wait to get to their spots: up until senior year I had to park in the back lot, which is so far from the main campus I may as well walk from my house. At least a perk of senior status is that I am only 300 feet from the entrance door. Even closer if I get here ungodly early and squat by the janitor's spot until he leaves for the day. If one is successful in acquiring this golden spot then one can leave immediately after school; otherwise he/she must enter the "exit march" in which one car is allowed out of the parking maze at a time, also coordinated by an overly starched octogenarian. I make sure to smile and wave genially to said attendant before I slip into the side door of the school.

I'm standing at my locker, lightly banging my head against the cool metal to shake the morning fog out of my brain when the warning bell rings for homeroom. I grab my books and hastily shove them in my bag. I'm not sure why we keep up the charade, it's not like we are learning anything new at this point. School is winding down for most of us, and it's more about organizing our future plans and embracing the change that is approaching. Everything here is so stale and rigid. It's like our impending graduation is a death march. It wouldn't hurt them to celebrate its meaning a little bit more, this place is such a snorefest.

The day is relatively uneventful. School drags on with the speed of water trickling up a mountain until the last bell rings. Out of absolute necessity to get through this existence, I've gulped down the recommended amount of over the counter pain reliever and finally have respite from the annoying throbbing that consumed most of my day. I'm at my locker and into the parking lot in record time. I hop into my car and cut off six underclassmen vehicles by driving over a segment of grass to get out before the wait-line ruins my newly clear head and vastly improved mood.

I turn the radio on and lower the windows, appreciating the warm spring air of the day as I pull away from the school, ignoring the angry grunts of sophomores and juniors I totally screwed during my departure. About halfway to my destination my stomach grumbles, surprising me. It appears as though my appetite has returned now that having my eyes open isn't making me nauseated. I stop by a sub shop to pick up some food before I have to be at the clinic, glancing down at the clock on the dash to check my time. Hell, I'm moving at a good clip today, maybe I'll finish up early. The thought makes me smile, something I don't think I've done even once today. Hmm, gotta work on that.

It's been a hectic day at Andrew's Sports and Physical Therapy Clinic and I'm happy to be in the quiet of the smaller room, out from under the watchful eye of my boss Brian and moving at a nice end-of-day pace for the mundane cleaning responsibilities. I am dutifully spraying and sterilizing the table tops and equipment, making mindless, light conversation with the second to last patient of the day, Quinn Fabray, as she ices her knees. Quinn's a repeat offender: one minor knee operation shortly followed by the second, so she has been a patient here for the past few months of my internship. _Internship_ feels wrong; I prefer _work camp_. St. B's requires "voli-tolding" ("told" volunteering), a full 200 hours before graduation. They tell us it's about "building character" or some non-sense like that. As if it weren't a political move to make them appear more generous to the community by enforcing forced, free labor of its students with threats of being held back. The whole thing seems a bit turn of the century barbaric but I have come to enjoy this job. I like this room the best because it's off set from the larger clinic space. The walls are lined with floor to ceiling mirrors but it contains only three beds, so it's much more private. I like to escape here at the end of the day because I can do some of my own exercises between clients.

My high school sports career came to a screeching halt when two consecutive injuries ended my senior year soccer season earlier than intended. I spent months going to Physical Therapy to get me back on my "feet" both literally and figuratively. The only nice thing about this "voli-tolding" is that we get to choose our location sites and because of it, I think I finally know what I want to be when I grow up. Or, at least, I have a better idea of what I don't want for my future- i.e. a rigid schedule, desk job, or customer service work. I like the easy flow of patient interaction and the movement of a fast-paced medical clinic. The freedom to float and interact is pleasant. I love my job, and I treat it like it's the most important thing in the world. It seems to be the only thing that interests me lately.

After a long workout today, Quinn needed to have both knees treated and was wearing a rather frustrated expression before I wandered into the room. When she noticed me, she smiled brightly and shifted her position on the plinth. She is reclined, with her back and neck propped up with pillows against the wall, her knees bent up with ice bags balanced precariously on top. She's reading some magazine half-heartedly, asking me questions intermittently, engaging in conversation as is our usual Tuesday/Thursday routine of late.

"So," she asks distractedly, her eyes skimming the print in front of her, "plans for the weekend?"

"Ugh, not really. I foresee lots of sleep in my future." I add with my back to her, wiping down the mats in the corner. I make a mental note to attack those cobwebs by the mirror next time I'm here.

"Really? No kegger at the boyfriend's?" She mumbles while flipping the page.

"Huh? Um, no. Happily single. Boys suck." I chuckled and appraised my work with a smile before turning back toward her.

She cocks her head to the side and looks at me, but I can't read the expression. Quinn is funny that way, like she always has something brewing under the surface but never quite shares what's on her mind. I look forward to her clinic appointments because she so dry and hilarious. Like half the time I find myself sitting on the table next to her pretending to look busy in case Brian comes in to check on me, just chatting with her about nothing in particular.

I'm actually committed to cleaning the table to her right today when the ice bag on her left knee slips off, "I'll get it," I say absentmindedly, putting down the rag help reposition the ice on her left knee. Part of my duties include helping out the therapists with setting up the patients, so I have become like an ice master the last few months. Quinn lets out an annoyed sigh before placing her magazine down and waiting for me to replace the freezing bag back on her knee. I can feel her watching my face as I reach across her body to reposition the bag and attempt to close the strap. Just as I velcro the strap into place she leans forward, cupping my face and turning it toward her before she kisses me, right on the lips.

I freeze, not moving, the shock of the moment paralyzing me on the spot. When she breaks the kiss and pulls back, my senses come rushing back, panic leading the charge "Woah!" I whisper harshly, "what are you doing?" I whip my head around waiting to be bagged by Brian. But no one is here, no one has seen, just me and her. Then the panic sets in… I'm going to lose my job, I'm screwed, why did I reach across her?...wait, did she just kiss me? I guess at this moment I realized all this discussion was in my head and I ought to pull back, which I do, abruptly and with an ungraceful stumble.

"Hey, um, sorry," she leans back, speaking softly, "I thought you were flirting with me."

"Flirting? Are you serious?!," I snap back, taking a step away from the table, keeping my eyes locked on hers.

"Yeah, I've been asking you all sort of leading questions. Questions you have been answering by the way," she sneers back at me, crossing her arms across her chest.

"What questions? Leading me where?" I'm baffled. She has obviously lost her mind, Maybe it's the ice, this must be a hypothermic response.

"Listen, I've been flirting with you for months, and you have been flirting back, obviously you've also been in denial," she turns her head away from me, opening her magazine again and sighing loudly.

Oh, hold up, no she didn't. "Woah, we have clearly had a miscommunication here," I counter. "I was not flirting with you. I was making easy, light conversation. I was being professional, I was being polite!" At this point my whisper is now normal speaking tone, but I'm a safe five steps away from her. It's here that I pause to see the whole picture. I can see the hurt she tries to mask, and I feel the flush burn up into my face.

"I'm sorry, I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to be so harsh, I, umm, you just caught me off guard that's all," I take a few tentative steps forward, hands up in surrender pose.

She pivots her green eyes up from the magazine, giving me a quick up and down before she replies coolly, "I guess I should have given you more notice, I didn't mean to freak you out." I can see a gentle pout forming on her lips, lips that I never noticed before this moment are a perfect light pink. She catches me staring at her mouth, and slips into an easy smile. I shake my head lightly, breaking the trance.

"Um, so, listen, not that it's the most important thing right now, but, um, are you going to say anything to Brian?" I ask tentatively, now standing at the side of the table, nervously tracing my fingers along the seam of the mat.

Her eyebrows are up at her hair line as she asks incredulously, "Wait...you're worried about Brian?"

"You don't understand! I need this job, it's a requirement for my graduating," I'm pleading at this point, one step from full on begging. I will do it. I am absolutely not against begging.

"Okay, relax, get your priorities in check, sister," she laughs at me, then realizing I'm dead serious, stifles her smile and looks directly into my eyes, "I mean it, Brian never finds out. I promise."

It feels like the weight of the world is off my shoulders, okay, now let's address the elephant in the room, um, she kissed me, and I think I kissed her back.

The rest of my time that afternoon flew by. I couldn't tell you what I did or said after she left the clinic. After about five minutes of awkward conversation, Brian popped into the room and told Quinn she was "all set," and scheduled her for two visits next week. Thankfully today was Thursday, which meant I had a few days to figure out what the hell just happened, before I see her again on Tuesday. We agreed to keep our little interaction between ourselves, but clearly we need to discuss what happened further. Or, if I'm lucky, maybe we don't. But I tend to be unlucky with most things, so, there's that.


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: Hey guys! Quick update for you. This one is a bit longer. Let me know what you think. ;) Thanks!**

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**Chapter Two: Personal Space**

The following weekend after my encounter with Quinn was uneventful. I busied myself with homework and friends. I did everything in my power not to think about the kiss, or how it made me feel. I avoided these thoughts like the plague, but all of a sudden it was Tuesday. And there is no running anymore, Quinn's appointment time is looming. When I get to the clinic I notice that Quinn rescheduled to the last appointment Brian had available, 5:15pm. My shift ends at 6pm. Coincidence? "Unlikely," I mutter to myself. I successfully avoided Quinn and Brian my entire shift, leaving the room when they walk in; take four bathroom breaks in forty minutes. I smile to myself when think I have missed her leaving and let out a sigh of relief as I clock out my time card.

I head outside, keys in hand, practically sprinting to my car when I hear her voice, "Hey, going somewhere?" I screech to a stop and pause, before I turn toward the sound of her voice. She is leaning against a white Mercedes convertible, legs crossed at the ankles, blond hair loosely tied into a sloppy ponytail.

"Um, Hi, I thought you left," I said, trying to hide the dashed hopes I had minutes before.

"No. You were hoping I left. Truth?" she asks knowing the answer.

"Yeah, maybe," I look down to avoid her gaze.

"Let's talk a little, huh? We should talk this out, we deserve that, you deserve that." I feel her looking at me, and nod, because she is right, this is not going away. Ugh. I muster up the courage to look at her; she's smiling. Fine, game on.

"So, what did you have in mind?" I ask, terrified and nervous.

"How about dinner? Or dessert? Any plans right now?" she asks eyebrow arched, confident in my answer.

"Sure, why not," I'm up for the challenge, I tell myself with false confidence- I know I'm in over my head.

We agree on driving to a nearby chain restaurant with inexpensive Mexican food. They sit us in the back at a booth by a window with a grand view of the parking lot. We order chips and salsa, water for me, margarita with salt for her. See, I found out recently that although I'm an appropriate high school age of eighteen, she is a mature college graduate aged twenty-three. We chit-chat. She tells me about college, about work as a publishing assistant at the main branch of a national bookseller. Her father was a publisher for years and she's followed suit. She's from a divorced family, an only child. Quinn tells me she was a big athlete all of her life and of late resumed weekend warrior sports involvement that resulted in her recent knee problems. "I've been out of the game too long," she says. I can't help but wonder if there is a double meaning behind the wink that follows that statement.

Dinner goes smoothly; we order light, talk casually throughout. I feel my guard going down as the time goes on, I am finding it very easy to converse and joke with her. Before long I notice the dinner rush dying down and check my watch. It's late now, past 9:30pm. It seems as though time has ticked by without either of us knowing. We ask for the check and she quickly pays before I can even reach for my purse.

"You don't have to do that," I say shyly.

"Well I did violate your personal space; it's the least I can do," she flashes me a smirk and makes direct eye contact. I find myself looking intently into her eyes, such a vibrant green, but with seemingly endless swirls of varying emerald color hues. I reach for the check to pay the tip, it's the least I can do, but her hand shoots out and places it over mine, gently pushing my hand away. I find myself staring down at our hands, not pulling mine away, but not sure why its drawing so much attention from me either. The momentary contact between our skin feels electric. Almost like she hears my frantic confused thoughts she gently glides her thumb across the knuckles of my hand and slowly pulls her hand away. The deliberate movement of her thumb on my hand is not lost on me. Part of me misses her warmth when it leaves, the other part of me is very, very nervous. It's a strange sensation; I am not often nervous, or uncomfortable with most things. I find conversing even with strangers to be easy and fun. I'm social and outgoing, popular by most people's standards. I am used to things coming easy to me, school, friends, sports, hobbies. Challenges are sought out by me usually, not frequently something I run into in daily life. I've had a good life, one without much loss, without a lot of pain. I'm fortunate in this way, I know that. But she makes me nervous, uncomfortable, and insecure, makes me feel young and inadequate. But I have no idea why.

By the time we clear the booth and walk outside it's after 10pm. It's Tuesday night and we are two of only six cars in the parking lot. We parked next to each other when we arrived, a move I am regretting now. My proximity to her as the night ends is making my skin vibrate with tension. The dinner was fine, uneventful, pleasant even; but it's this part I was dreading the most.

She leans against my car, absentmindedly twirling her long blond pony tail. "Thank you for coming out with me tonight. I know you were probably really freaked out. I apologize for making you uncomfortable. I'd like for us to get along if possible, I had a lot of fun getting to know you." She looks at me intently while she says this to me, I feel the intensity of her gaze on my face, I know she is being sincere in this moment and I relax a little.

"I had fun too." I admit freely, "Maybe we could make this a regular occurrence. Assuming you want to…" I immediately regret the last statement, feeling like I look as goofy as it felt to utter. I can't believe I just said that

She smiles. "I would really like that," she says softly, then innocently touches my forearm, closing the gap between us. I feel that electric pulse purr through me again, like I'm in contact with a live wire. My eyes want to bulge out of my head but I do the best I can to keep them at bay. She doesn't seem to notice, but I feel her gaze intensify on my mouth. I flash her a nervous smile, teeth exposed, and she spreads her arms indicating she is looking for a hug. My reaction is automatic; I step forward slightly and easily slip into her arms. Maybe too easily, I realize, and feel my body tense. At first it's a stiff, robotic hug, but her warmth and confidence seeps through the distance between us. I gently hug her back and find myself smiling slightly over her shoulder in the direction of the restaurant. The hug is quick, but sincere; she leans back with her arms loosely linked around my waist. I don't remember them sliding down there, but I do recall thinking I like the smell of her perfume, and trying to stop myself from huffing in her scent during the hug.

My eyes slowly drag back to her face as I realize I have again wandered off into my own crazy thoughts, and she flashes a quick, subtle smile. I start to let go of her shoulders and am beginning to shift the weight on my feet to break the hug when she tightens her grip around my waist. She leans forward, looking at me intently, her pupils large and dark. I know what's happening, but I do nothing to stop it. Maybe I'm afraid, maybe I'm curious, I don't know. I just know I see it and there is nothing I do to stop it.

The kiss is tentative, slow, and curious. It is warmer than I expect, softer. I don't remember how the first kiss felt because I only remember the surprise and fear. But this one I know I will remember. I feel her increase the pressure against my mouth and find myself closing my eyes to focus on the feeling. I'm not sure what I'm doing with her; it's not like I haven't been kissed before, but this is so foreign to me. My mind buzzes with thoughts but my instincts take over. I slip my arms back up her sides and return her light embrace. I feel myself leaning into her mouth, just slightly at first, then with more emphasis when her body responds positively. I kiss her back, actively participating now, and I feel her smile against my mouth. She gently leans back against the car and pulls me with her. Her hand creeps up to the back of my neck and lightly dances along my hair line. I feel a low shiver quake through me as I feel her fingers scratch my hair. I push into her lips more forcefully now, not opening my mouth, but increasing the contact of my skin on hers. She pushes back and hums quietly against my lips; the sensation provokes another small shiver from me. A smile breaks from my lips with a single thought: _this is fun_.

Quinn breaks the kiss and pulls her head back slightly. I can feel her looking intently at my face. I open my eyes to meet hers and she leans back in for a quick peck on my lips. Then the smile comes, bright and blinding, indicating her delight at her success. Like she has just gotten the confirmation that she needed, that she knew was hiding under the surface and that she teased out. "So," I mutter breathlessly, "um, THAT happened."

She laughs and lets her hand slip down from my neck back to my shoulder, "Mmm Hmm," she hums behind that blinding smile. I lean back and survey the full view of her face, lips, loosely tied hair. I feel her watching my eyes as they slowly cruise over her features. I think she is very attractive, but I don't think I had considered it fully before. I find myself looking at her details more closely, the varying shades of blond and honey brown in her hair, the way her eyes crinkle at the edge when she smiles, the shape of her mouth. I'm studying her face now, maybe too intensely because she slips into a nervous giggle, snapping my trance. I feel a blush flooding my cheeks.

"I like when you look at me," she says quickly, trying to calm the nervous flush filling my face. I think it works because I start to feel the heat lighten in my neck, and am more aware of the cool night air now. I shiver involuntarily, from the cold of the outdoors I imagine, but, maybe from what just happened.

"I have to go." I can feel myself frowning as I say this quietly. It's late now, and I am a high school student, with a curfew, and school in the morning. Plus I have some serious thinking to do on the ride home. Let's hope I don't think myself into a tree… She nods, her smile decreasing in size, but still brightening her face.

"Ok," she reaches out and lightly brushes a loose hair from my brow, her eyes locked on mine. The touch draws my gaze away from hers, I'm shy again. I step back from her and fiddle with the keys I realize have been shoved in my pocket at an uncomfortable angle. I unlock my car door and increase the distance between us by stepping back further. I notice that I miss the warmth that I felt against her body, and I feel myself wanting to step closer to her again. I shake my head lightly to ignore the feeling, and she steps forward, away from my driver side door. I open it slowly, facing her, and an easy smile slides over my lips.

"So," she dances around the next few words, "when can I see you again?"

Hmm, I hadn't thought of this, "Um, well, I guess on Thursday at your appointment." The answer came out automatically, like it was an obvious fact.

"Oh, yeah, okay." She seems surprised at first; maybe I misinterpreted her question. "Here, let me give you my number, in case you want to talk or something."

"Sure," I'm surprised this hasn't already happened I guess, but I don't know why this surprises me, I mean I don't really know her, do I? I put the keys in my ignition, roll down the driver's side window and sit in the seat, reaching for my phone, which, inconveniently, is dead. I toss it onto the passenger's side and grab for a pen and scrap paper from the console. I jot down my number, nearly illegibly and I hand it to her, apologizing for the rudimentary digit exchange. She laughs, and begins to jot down her number as I rummage in my glove box for my cell phone car charger. When I find it, plug it in and turn back to her I find that she is leaning against the door frame, typing my number into her phone. She hands back the scrap paper to me and I put it into the overhead visor so I won't lose it. Why am I worried about losing it? I never lose anything, I'm anal retentive about organization. It's an illogical reaction.

"Thanks again, for dinner, I had a good time," I say sincerely. It was fun. All of it (gulp).

"Sure, me too, I'll call you later, see you on Thursday I guess," she's still smiling. It's making me blush. I avert my gaze out the windshield toward the restaurant again. When I look back at her, her eyes are studying my face and she is much closer than I remember. Leaning her right hand on the door frame for leverage, she gently cups the side of my face and turns my mouth towards hers before she kisses me firmly on the lips.

The surprise of the kiss causes me to gasp slightly, opening my mouth millimeters and letting out a quick breath. She seizes the opportunity and gently pushes her tongue against my parted lips, evoking a similar, involuntary response from me. I feel myself gliding my tongue towards hers and gently teasing the line of her lips. Our kiss deepens now and we are tentatively exploring each other with our tongues, with wet and warm movements. I find myself reaching to cradle the side of her face with one hand, the other hand in a vice grip on my own knee. When my hand touches her face she lets out a low moan, almost inaudibly, and it shatters my focus. I break the kiss slightly, and peck her lips quickly, before I lean back. My head is swimming, I think I feel dizzy. My hand slips from her face onto my lap, my right hand releases the death grip on my knee. I can feel fingernail marks on the skin.

She opens her eyes slightly, eyelids like heavy hoods, and she lets a small smile creep up her face. "I'll talk to you soon," it comes out like a whisper and she turns quickly from the door frame, stepping to her car.

I close the driver side door, lock it (I don't know why), and glance out my side mirror watching her step into her car. Once she steps in and closes the door, I put the car in drive and pull out of the spot, probably too quickly from the sound of the tires screeching. "Fuck," I cringe, "Smooth move…" I self-criticize and attempt to control my pressure on the gas/brake activity. I pull out of the parking lot as she starts her car and flicks on her headlights.

I get about a mile from the restaurant before the panic attack starts. I have to pull over because my hands are shaking on the steering wheel. Did that just happen? What the FUCK? How is it already 10:30 pm? I am so screwed! What the hell am I going to tell my parents? –_Oh sorry Mom, grabbed a bite after work, then made out with a patient in the parking lot, that's why I'm late and I didn't return any of your calls, oh, because my cell phone died and I forgot the rest of the world existed outside of the two of us…yeah, I know it's irresponsible, yes I know better. The patient? Umm, she's nobody, she… _

The conversation I was running through in my mind came to a screeching halt. _She_. Woah. Not exactly the profound reaction I expected to get from a pronoun. Was I ready for that? No, absolutely not. This was too much for a Tuesday night, for any night. I took three deep breaths, cursed a few more times, and strummed my fingers nervously on the console before I turned on the radio. It was something loud and angry; rock nonsense that I had heard a thousand times and could sing the words to without thinking. I flipped my blinker on and drove home on autopilot. I avoided thinking until I pulled into the driveway and noticed the light on over the sink in the kitchen. Someone was waiting up for me. Shoot.

I pull into the driveway and shut off the car, breathing deeply before exiting the driver side. I got about halfway to the house when I remembered my cell phone was charging on the passenger seat, I jogged back to grab it, noticing it had kept enough of a charge to see my missed call list: 5 missed calls from Home, 2 angry texts from Mom/Dad, 1 winky face text from a number I didn't recognize. This must be Quinn's number; I felt a shy smile creep up the corner of my mouth, until the sound of the front door being whipped off its hinges distracted me.

My mother is leaning out of the house, peering out at my dark form in the driveway. "Where the HELL have you been?!" it comes out as a bark.

"Umm," I stutter, "I, um…" As I take a few more tentative steps to the house the overhead motion detector flashes on, blinding me. I raise my arm instinctively over my eyes, (another distraction from my impending doom, I muse). Blind and going in for the slaughter, how fucking tragic.

"Get in here. NOW," she commands, and quickly turns on her heels into the house.

I feel my shoulders slump and I plod up the steps with the enthusiasm of a sloth. Mom is standing by the kitchen sink washing the same glass over and over by the time I finally get into the kitchen, close the door and sit at the table. My throat is dry and nearly closed with panic; I have no idea what to tell her. She turns expectantly in my direction, eyes clearly demanding some sort of explanation for my tardiness, hands on her hips. I make eye contact because I know I have to, although I'm still partially blinded by the motion detector light attack on my corneas.

"Sorry Mom, my phone died and I didn't realize how late it was until I plugged it in, but it didn't have enough of a charge to make a call. I went out to dinner after work, I'm so sorry. It won't happen again," my words are flying out in such a way that I doubt she can hear where one sentence ends and the next begins.

She frowns, but her forehead lightens. "That is unacceptable. You are trying to tell me that your friends don't have working cell phones? Or that watch you are wearing currently does not tell time? Which is it?" This is like the Spanish Inquisition I think, it's just a matter of time before the torture begins…

"I know, it was ridiculous, it was just a really long day and I'm very, very tired. I swear to you it was not intentional." I'm pleading right now, but I'm being honest. It was a very, very long day and I am emotionally spent right now.

She continues to look at me with an uncomfortable intensity, but the anger in her brow is almost gone. "Do you want to talk about something? Did something happen today?" she asks with genuine concern.

"No," I spit out too quickly, "I'm just stressed with school stuff and my job, I needed to take my mind off of things for a bit. I know I should have called, time just got away from me," I answer in a softer voice than I intend to, my gaze on the wood patterns of the table.

"Listen, we have rules here. If you are to have your own car then you have to follow the rules. We want to know where you are when you are out driving around. It's not that we don't trust you; it's the other people in the world we worry about. You need to call if you are not coming home, because your father is in a full blown fit right now, and I'm not calling him to tell him you are home. That is your job tonight," she says with a firm tone, and I know that is the worst punishment she can issue.

Nothing screams "reaping what you sow" like talking to a raging father that works nights and has probably been beside himself with worry that his only daughter 1) is not returning calls or texts; 2) hasn't been home since 7 am this morning; and 3) is well past weeknight school curfew. "Okay, sorry Mom, I'll go call Dad…" I feel the pout spring off of my face before I can stop it. Confessing transgressions to my Dad is a fate worse than death in my mind. He will absolutely ground me, but the ear assault I'm about to be inflicted with is worse. I get up from the table and stalk up to my room, plopping my back onto the comforter as I scan through my phone for his contact. The conversation goes as I expect. I'm grounded for 2 weeks, and threats to take away my car and phone fly and reappear throughout the 15 minute call like angry little humming birds circling my head. I apologize, profusely, finally silencing the beast, and he asks me to have Mom call him right away. I yell down to her that Dad wants her to call his work number, and shut my bedroom door again so I can be in my own personal silence.

My phone pings. It's a snickering tongue smiley face from my younger brother in the next room, obviously aware of my parental predicament. I bang on the wall and flip him off through the plaster. I wash up and flop back onto the bed face first. It's after midnight and I have a test tomorrow in Spanish. "_Dios mio"_ I mutter hopelessly into the comforter. I reach over to my charging phone to set my alarm when I notice another message. Just as I'm about to jump out of bed and throttle my brother I notice it's from Quinn, a slight smile sneaks across my face.

Quinn: "_Hope ur parents didn't kill u, see u soon?"_

Me: "_survived- minimal damage, ttyl thx again for dinner"_

Quinn (within seconds) "_anytime ;) nite."_

I smiled to myself again, clicked off the light and had a restless sleep.


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N: Thanks for all the follows and favorites. Also, thanks for the reviews, I read them all, thank you for the feedback.**

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**Chapter Three: Grounded (part 1)**

The days following my dinner date with Quinn were a blur. School projects were increasing in number, and college essays were still being handed back and forth between teacher and students. Even though almost all students had completed the college application process, some schools had still not replied to all candidates and my school was violently pushing perfection. Most high schools start aggressively grooming students their junior year for college, but not here in these holy walls; here, we were conditioned for perfection from freshman year onward.

My Spanish test was postponed due to my teacher's unexpected food related illness to, ironically enough, Mexican cuisine the night before. She didn't have time to prep the test Wednesday morning, so it was rescheduled to next week. _Dios_ is smiling on me, evidently, since I slept a total of twenty-three minutes last night, my head swimming with questions and aggressively loud emotions.

Thursday trudged along as usual. I conversed with my friends and jotted the necessary notes in class, but my eyes continued to wander to the clock on the wall, ticking time away until I had to go to my job at the clinic. By 2:15 my pulse was racing, and a cool line of sweat was on my brow when I reached my locker. I pushed and shoved books in and out of my bag, not paying attention to the fact that I was moving the same book repeatedly multiple times before I realized Chemistry and Biology were not the same class. I shook my head to break the fog I was in, sucked in a deep breath, closed my locker and spun to my right to leave.

Katie McCarthy, my best friend, was standing there, looking at me inquisitively. She obviously had asked me a question that went unheard, and I stared at her blankly.

"Hello? Did you hear what I said? What is up with you lately?" she scrunched her forehead in mild concern, leaning against the lockers with her thumbs looped into her backpack straps.

"Umm, sorry, no, what did you say?" It's more of a mutter than a reply. I'm glancing at the clock over her shoulder.

"I said, you freak, that there is a party on Friday at Kevin's and I wanted to grab a ride with you if you were going. So are you going?"

Kevin was one of those people that we were friends with because we were in all the same classes, but for whom I didn't particularly hold any great affection, or care to breathe the same air, quite frankly. But everyone else is going, and she wants to go, so I nod.

"Great, let's chat at lunch tomorrow…."

"Fuck!" I spit a little too loudly, and she ducks her head and looks around nervously,

"What?! Watch your language, the nuns have ears everywhere," she hisses in a sharp whisper.

"I can't go tomorrow, I'm grounded," I sigh and dig the toe of my shoe into the linoleum.

"Grounded? Since when?" her eyebrow is arched slightly, eyes squinting.

"Umm Tuesday night I guess, I got home late, blah blah blah." I roll my eyes and try to play off the near death parental altercation as nothing.

She squints a little more and asks with a smirk, "Where were you Tuesday that you were late getting home? And how are you still alive? I mean, your Dad is one scary motherfu…"

"MISS McCARTHY, that had better not be a curse word slipping out of your mouth young lady!" Sr. Roselyn popped out of nowhere inches from her face with a gnarly, arthritic finger pointing straight at Katie's nose.

"Oh, sorry, no Sister, absolutely no such thing as that was leaving my mouth," she blurts out in reply. I can't help but giggle and smirk at this ambush.

Sr. Roselyn eyes me suspiciously; "shouldn't you two ladies be heading to your volunteer positions by now? Don't dilly dally in the halls." And with that she turns quickly, her habit catching in the air as she storms off to chastise Armand about his perpetually untucked uniform shirt.

"God, the school day is over! Who knew she was so damn stealthy _and_ still enforcing the uniform policy." I glance around nervously realizing I just took the Lord's name in vain and cursed in the same sentence.

"Ugh," Katie grimaced, "I'm just thankful detention didn't come along with that dragon breath facial." She shuddered and shook her head.

I glanced up at the clock again and sighed, "I have to go; I'm going to be late. I'll catch up with you later."

"Don't think that means I forgot what we were talking about, missy," Katie wags her finger at me teasingly, "I expect a call tonight." I tip my head down and glare at her lightly, before nodding in submission and trotting out to the car.

That day, my entire shift at the clinic was one of intense, non-stop activity. The patients were literally stacked on top of each other. Every therapist was working and all the linens were being used. By the end of the night I was waist-deep in towels, pillow cases and soiled johnnies from an influx of evaluations at 4pm. I had been a hostage of the laundry room since about 6pm, and I could tell that I wouldn't be out of here anytime soon.

There was a knock on the doorframe behind me, and I whipped my head up expecting Brian to be there with more linens. I was surprised to see Quinn standing there, casually leaning against the door frame. Her long, lean torso was clothed in a black tank top, her legs in dark blue yoga capris. I found my eyes tracing up her body before I caught her eyes on mine. I felt a blush creep up my neck. I'm sure she must have noticed.

"Hi, you look, umm, busy." She was grinning. Damn, she totally saw me check her out.

"The laundry room is taking prisoners, don't get too close," I warned, half serious. I proceeded to throw as much as I could into the open washers, transferring two loads into the dryers.

"So, umm, when do you think you will be done? I have an open hour or so, maybe we can grab dinner?" she asks casually while staring tentatively at my mouth, eyes tracing to my chest. Like I wouldn't notice… like I could even keep eye contact that long? No, obviously I would notice a lazy, roaming gaze.

"Umm, sure, let me check with Brian, he's the boss you know." I ask knowing that she has more "pull" than me.

She smirks and quips, "I mentioned to him that slave labor went out in the early 1860s. So, we have planted the seed I think."

I know that this means nothing, because Brian can be a beast when it comes to work or his expectations of my "volitold" accomplishments. But, to my extreme surprise, he pokes his head in the room behind Quinn's perfect silhouette. "Hey, there is obviously a ton of laundry. You can head out; that Boston University kid is here tomorrow, if you start the washes, he can fold in the morning."

I sighed audibly, and tried to pretend it was a sigh of fatigue for his sake, then put my arms up in defeat, signaling that I was done for the night.

Brian nodded his head, "have a good night, Rachel. See you on Tuesday."

And with that I was free.

Free to what? God only knows, but free from work that was for sure. Quinn smiled at me, winked and waved her hand indicating it was time to leave. I followed her out of the laundry death, through the gym, to the time sheet clock. Quinn waited by the vacant front desk while I checked out and walked to the back room to grab my bag. I took the privacy time to have two small panic attacks: one that included mild hyperventilation knowing that I had no real plans after work that I could pretend kept my attention from Quinn; and a second that was roughly made up of unanswerable questions: How am I going to get around being grounded? Have I lost my damn mind? What the hell am I going to say/do when I'm in her presence? Answers are as follows: Who knows? Obviously. And my personal favorite, Probably faint.

"So, you free?" She asks causally as I sling my bag over my shoulder. I have no answer, I look vacantly at her face, mouth open, and nod, because what the hell else am I going to do? I'm trapped, I know it, and I'm mildly dying in this moment.

"Good, how about dinner? My treat." She hurries the last part, as incentive. This feels very familiar to the other night. She's offering dinner, who am I to refuse? She walks with me out to the parking lot, but we get nowhere.

About two steps from the safety of my hand-me-down Chrysler she pushes me against the car door, and kisses me deeply, hands on both sides of my face. The bag drops instinctively from my hands and hits the ground with a vacant thud. Carnal reaction takes over: her kiss envelops my lips, hands rush to the back of my head, gently scratching at my scalp and pulling me closer. Before I can think, her tongue presses forcibly against my lips, leaping over the boundary of flirtation and obscuring the "flee to the wind because this is intense" feeling that is threatening to wash over me.

My body betrays me and my hands slip up her sides, stopping behind her shoulders and clutching at her neck. I part my lips slightly, but enough for her to access my hot, desperate mouth. Is this what I want? I am so confused, brain says, and yet my body speaks the language she breathes; I'm a victim to my new found curiosity. She moans lightly as she laps behind my teeth, challenging my tongue to dance with hers. She presses her body against me, pinning me to the car, lightly rolling her hips against mine. I feel everything and nothing, too much sensory overload for me to understand what's happening, I break the kiss with a gasp.

"Woah," my hands slide to her collarbones and lightly push back. "Hey, how was your day?" I quip against plump, wanting lips, speaking into her mouth. I feel her smile and nip my bottom lip.

"Much better now," she purrs, I melt, and my lips meet hers again.

Her hands roam my clothed body, claiming it as her own with a ferocity that I cannot deny. They skim down my sides, thumbs sliding along the waist of my pants, dominating my senses. She drags her nails along the barely visible line of my panties, gently teasing the fabric lower as she moves from my mouth to the right side of my neck, kissing and licking as if her life depends on it. I turn my head instinctively, begging her to taste all of my neck, to control me. As she nips my collarbone, my predicament flashes before me. I am in the parking lot of my job, pinned to a car by a patient, being mauled at the neck like a victim of a werewolf attack. A flush creeps up my neck into my face, and my gentle resistance grows to a head- I push her back and suck in the cold night air as though I have been suffocating.

"Stop, slow down, oh my God, what if he sees?" I know my breathing is frantic, gasping, but my thoughts are surprisingly rational. I mean it. What if Brian sees me hooking up with a patient? I'd be screwed.

She pulls back, doesn't break eye contact and mutters, "well let's go somewhere else then…" Her eyes dart to her car, conveniently parked a car away from mine, again. My desire betrays me, I find myself staring at her lips and gently trailing down her body, stopping at her hips and trailing back up to her chest. I hate myself in that moment, but I have no control as my body responds to her closeness like a magnet.

"What do you have in mind?" it comes out like a seductive purr, but I don't recognize my own voice.

A smile flashes across her face, she whispers as she touches the waistband of my pants as casually as she can, "How about takeout, my place?" The question is tentative, but the flash of light in her eyes is deliberate. She asks as her eyes trace my jaw, over my earlobe and flick back to my eyes as if an afterthought.

I cave, too quickly for my own comfort. "Okay." It comes out like a hiss, no emotion, just automatic. She grins and I'm blinded by the wattage that accompanies it. God, she has perfect teeth.

...

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**Oh man... What's gonna happen NOW?**


	5. Chapter 4 (Part 2)

**A/N: part 2! Sorry to leave you lovelies hanging. ;)**

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**Chapter Four: Grounded (part 2)**

"Good," she smirks in success, "I live close, why don't you follow me and we can order something when we get there?" It's more of a command than a request, I get the feeling she is used to being in charge. I nod like a good little soldier, my actions outside of my control. She pecks me on the mouth, smiles again and turns quickly, pulling out her keys with a gracefulness that surprises me. I can barely breathe right now, never mind having motor skills to use my hands to unlock a vehicle that at this point could be considered a weapon, because I am obviously acting under the influence of some terrible thing, something distracting me from breathing…am I safe to drive? Probably not, I acknowledge. She glances over her shoulder at me before hopping exuberantly into her pristine, white convertible. Headlights flash on before I can even find my keys. I pick up my bag, clumsily, and sit in the driver's side of my average car.

I turn the ignition and repeat to myself over and over, "everything is going to be fine, just breathe, you can handle this…" It's false confidence, because as the mantra sounds over and over in my car, my heart beats faster and faster. I feel like I'm running, but I haven't even put the car into drive yet. She pulls out of the parking lot, slowly; I can see her checking the rear view repeatedly to make sure I'm following.

I thrust my headset a little too aggressively into my ear to call my house and let them know I will be late. My mother answers on the third ring;

"Hello?" her voice is soft and tired sounding.

"Hi Mom! (too enthusiastic, I can tell, and pinch myself) "What's up?"

There is a pause, then she replies slowly, "Nothing much. Are you coming home for dinner?" She asks casually. I can hear typing in the background.

"Katie invited me over for dinner to work on a school project. I probably won't be home until late, is that okay?" The lies spew from my mouth like air, no thought behind them. They sound so sincere it scares me.

"Umm sure, but it's a school night, don't be home too late. I expect you home by 10:30, 11pm at the absolute latest. I mean it. You are supposed to be grounded." The tone in her voice reaffirms the seriousness of her statement; I am not to be late, if I expect to live, especially after Tuesday's shenanigans.

"You got it Mom, thanks." The words come out with a sigh and sincerity.

It's 6:30pm now; I have plenty of time to get home before curfew. Now that I have permission to be absent on the parental front I find myself relaxing back into my seat, paying more attention to where I am going. Up until now I had been on autopilot, following Quinn's car without attention to direction or speed. Now that I had quelled the fear of doom I was more able to watch the streets passing on my left and right and follow the rules of the road. I passed through three stop lights, hopped on the highway for one exit and slowly pulled off the exit ramp before my heart rate started to normalize. I was breathing normally as I followed her, music softly playing in the background as a distraction until I noticed her left blinker signal a turn into a condominium complex. She eased into the driveway and parked in a numbered spot. She hopped out in lightning speed and pointed to a visitor spot a few rows down from hers. I pulled into it without breathing; my panic resurfacing again as I realized this was probably her house. She was right; it was only a twelve minute drive from my work. 11 minutes of peaceful ignorance before the panic started to rumble in my chest.

I put the car in park, leaned my head against the headrest and closed my eyes, breathing in deeply and repeating to myself silently, _everything is going to be fine, just breathe, you can handle this… _I got through two full repetitions before I heard a light tap at the driver's side window. Crap. She found me. I opened my eyes slowly and turned my head, a look of mild surprise pursed my lips, though I fought it desperately. She grinned at me and pointed to the door handle. My hand moved of its own fruition to unlock the doors. Once the click sounded she opened the door slowly, almost as if she realized I was suffocating in fear. I glanced at her, my movements feeling slower than normal, out of my control.

She chuckled at what I presume was the expression on my face, "Ready? I'm starved…" she said, while staring directly into my overly dilated pupils.

Really? That's the word choice we are using? The question buzzed through my head, but my only response was, "Uh huh."

So articulate, I know. Years and years of extensive college preparatory training with multiple language education and my answer is "uh huh." I'm making someone proud somewhere; I roll my eyes in defeat. I see a perplexed look cross her brow and realize the eye roll was physical not mental, and immediately put my hand to her outstretched arm to soothe, why, I don't know. The corners of her mouth creep up slightly and she pulls the door back farther, granting me more space to exit the suffocating confines of my mind, err, car. I step out tentatively, closing the door behind me. I may as well accept the fact that I am 100% committed to whatever is going to happen, since I'm here, God knows where, following a beautiful girl into her home. What the hell am I thinking? The words circle in my head, but my feet follow her through the parking lot toward the garden outside her home.

She leads me around the back of the building, keeping a few steps in front of me, looking back occasionally to make sure I haven't sprinted back to the safety of my car. I know I am walking, but I feel an odd sensation of floating as we cross the threshold into the courtyard, walking around a beautiful marble and concrete fountain toward a deep red door at the other end of the garden area. My eyes trace over the tops of pretty, multicolored flowers. She pulls out her keys and slips them effortlessly into the lock; the ornate gold handle and door knocker catch my attention.

As we step into her apartment I immediately catch a familiar scent, light and airy, faint scent of vanilla and something like a musk… I remember this smell because it's very distinctly hers. I don't think I had realized it before, but I am very familiar and comfortable with this smell, like I've been around it forever. The thought startles me; I shake my head to bring myself back to the present. She is in front of me, kicking off her shoes, gently scratching her head before glancing in the mirror by the front door. I follow suit, kicking my own shoes off and step into her visual field. I catch her watching me in the mirror. She turns; smiles almost shyly, and says she will grab some take-out menus. She tells me to make myself at home and she will meet me in the living room. She gestures with her hand past her kitchen on the right into a beautifully decorated open floor plan.

Hardwood floors, white leather sofa with love seat, bright red comfy chair with black tables, muted lamps and a comfortable glow around a fireplace that at present is unlit. I plop onto the sofa, run my hands along the seams and over the silky brown throw blanket draped along its back. Everything in here looks like a furniture catalog; Williams and Sonoma bookcases over there, Pier One frames and vases over there. There is a soft, inviting brown and tan carpet lining the floor that I can feel through my socks. I am absentmindedly digging my toes into plush carpet when I feel her drop into the seat next to me. She leans back into the sofa, bringing one leg up and under herself and fans out four menus in front of me.

"So, do you have a preference? Thai, Chinese, Sushi or Italian… All are good, just depends on what you are in the mood for." She is smiling, a genuine grin. I find myself matching it easily.

"Um, honestly? I'm easy, anything is fine with me." As soon as the words left my mouth I felt the blush burn on my cheeks. Being fair-skinned is a curse when embarrassment is such a palpable thing in high school.

"Haha, okay, that's good to know." She winks and goes for the easy flirt, holds up the Italian option and reaches for the phone. Conveniently, it's on the cradle next to me on the table. I see her eyes look over at the phone and I reach to hand it to her. Before I complete the task I feel her left hand skim over my knee and her weight shift on the couch. She reaches across my chest and takes it from my opposite hand. Her fingers linger on mine before she takes the phone from my suddenly sweaty grasp. She leans back slowly, putting her hand on my knee to help her sit back up as she shifts back to her side of the couch. I swear her hand burned a hole through the fabric of my pants, but I stare down and see that nothing has changed, except for the increase in my heart rate and my shallow breathing. She orders something, I don't hear what; instead, I'm watching the way she twirls her pony tail with her fingers, smiles while she talks to a male voice on the other end of the line. She's put on a fresh application of shiny lip gloss since we've been here; the shimmer catches the warm, glow light of the room while she nods her head, silently confirming the order as he reads it back to her.

"K, all set, dinner in fifteen minutes- I told them I'd tip them extra if it came before I die of starvation." She chuckles to herself, sucking her bottom lip between her teeth slightly as she puts the phone on the table in front of her.

"So, what are we having?" I'm trying to pull my mind out of the gutter long enough to have a coherent conversation, but I am drawn to the shimmering gloss in front of me.

"Salad, pizza, breadsticks. I wasn't sure what you'd want, figured I would get a little of everything," she shrugs. A dimple sneaks out when she smiles.

"Sounds perfect. I am super hungry, work was a nightmare today…" I lean back into the couch, allowing myself to lounge and shift until my back is partially against the armrest of the sofa. I tuck my legs up to my chest and close my eyes and rest my head on the sofa, letting out a deep sigh as the true fatigue of my day catches up to me. I realize I've been up since 5 am and after two tests, a quiz and a very busy shift at the clinic, I am exhausted.

The next thing I know a doorbell jars me back to consciousness. I look down and see a blanket draped across my legs and tucked under my chin. I yawn sleepily and look around at my unfamiliar surroundings. The light of the outside has dimmed, the curtains are drawn shut and the fireplace is on. I stretch out my legs and roll my neck to loosen the awkward stiffness from my impromptu nap.

"Hey there Sleeping Beauty," she purrs from behind me, "I hope you don't mind that I let you sleep, but you looked exhausted. I figured I was doing us both a favor." She walks around the couch, places the food and some plates on the table in front of us.

I stifle a yawn, "Yeah, sorry. I guess I wasn't much of a conversationalist, but I feel surprisingly refreshed." I smile as I return to full human form.

"Well, I should hope so. You must have been having a pretty good dream by the massive smile on your face the whole time you were out. What were you dreaming about?"

There's a glint of something in her emerald eyes, but I'm not quite sure what it is, "Honestly, I couldn't tell you, but it must have been something very relaxing, because I don't remember hearing you start a fire… And that probably should alarm me. Smokey the Bear would be very disappointed." My gaze travels over to the inviting glow of the fireplace, the flickering flames momentarily mesmerizing me.

"Ha! I would burn this whole place down if I went near a real fireplace- its electric." she hops off the sofa with a wicked grin, reaches around the bookcase frame and flips a switch, instantly extinguishing the flame, breaking the hypnotic effect it had over me. I laugh out loud, because this makes much more sense, being as it's spring time and not that cold. She flicks it back on and saunters back toward the couch.

"Hungry?" she hands me a breadstick, my stomach grumbles in appreciation. We chat easily over breadsticks and pizza, she sips red wine and I nurse a glass of water.

"I have to pee; I imagine this place has a bathroom?" I'm very relaxed now, fed, rested, dare I say, playful?

She smiles and grabs my hand, pulling me off the couch, "Here I'll show you, I'd hate for you to get lost," she chuckles and shakes her head.

She guides me by the hand, gently lacing her fingers into mine. The bathroom is a short walk off the living room; her bedroom is at the end of the hallway. I can see the bedside lamp on and the fluffy off-white down comforter folded perfectly beneath dozens of soft, hotel pillows. I return my attention to the bladder urgency, but am reluctant to let go of her hand. The warmth is very comforting. I turn to face her, gently squeeze her fingers before I let her hand drop from mine; I can see a smile sneak up to her eyes.

She is in the kitchen putting away the leftovers when I come back out. I reach for her wine glass on the counter and, emboldened by my desire, I taste it. Quinn glances up from the dishwasher and smirks as I sip the wine hesitantly. It's not really my thing; my alcohol exposure is mostly hard liquor with mixers or beer. Wine isn't deep in the catalogue of beverages for a senior in high school.

"Well, you should never play poker, because you have a terrible poker face…" she laughs as I choke back a grimace.

"How do you drink this stuff? It's a little dry for me." I am stifling the gag reaction that is desperate to break across my face.

"It's a learned thing; I didn't get into it until I was older. Red wine pairs well with Italian, and there are sweeter wines out there to ease into the taste." She takes the glass from my hand, swirling it in the glass before taking a small sip.

"I'm definitely a 'sweeter' person, but I am always up for trying new things…" I hear myself flirting and wonder when I grew a set.

"Is that so? Another interesting tidbit from you tonight. You're easy, and you are up for trying new things… I sense a trend here." She smiles wickedly, walks over and places her hands on either side of me, pressing her palms flat on the countertop.

I see the kiss coming but it still catches me off guard. A gasp escapes before her mouth seals against mine. I can taste the wine on her tongue as it slips past my lips. I find myself smiling against her mouth, thinking I could get used to the taste of wine.

Quinn pulls back just enough to breathe against my lips. "What's so funny?" she asks, as she closes the distance again with a deeper kiss, her hand tracing up my arm, gently scratching the skin as she goes.

"Just thinking that wine tastes great on you, that's all." I nip at her lower lip and pull her closer to me.

The kissing goes from playful to passionate quickly. I surprise myself with the way I push into her, meeting her physicality with my own. My fingers find her waist, teasing at the hem of her tank top. I feel her involuntarily shiver as my cool hands touch warm skin. Her hand flies up my shoulder and grasps the back of my neck, pulling me closer, infinitely tighter against her. I leave one hand on her hip while the other traces up heaving ribs and dances along the edge of her breast. She grins between wet, hot kisses before she laces her fingers through mine and presses my palm against her breast. I shiver from the boldness of her actions and begin to gently knead the soft flesh, feeling sparks ignite in my stomach and around my head. She moans into my mouth, her kissing becoming less controlled and more reactive. I like the way she is less in control, I like being the reason she is moaning. My own confidence swells when she presses her hips firmly against mine, her hand at my low back, the other encouraging my hand on her breast. I feel an erect nipple press into my palm. My fingers curls around it, gently squeezing and plucking. "Oh," the word slips out uncontrolled and she breaks the kiss, tilting her head back, eyes closed. My mouth finds the pulse point of her neck, kissing and licking gently along her jaw, nipping her ear lobe. Her hands are all over me, grabbing my waist, fingers dragging down my jaw line, tracing over my collarbone, pressing flat against my chest. Sometime during this my hand slid under the hem of her shirt, my fingers pressing against flat, sculpted abs. The muscles quiver under the heat of my hand, and I push up her shirt to cup her other breast. Her hands leave my body long enough to tug her tank over her head. My eyes are glued to a purple lace bra and her perfect cleavage in front of me. My tongue slips over my bottom lip as I trace my fingers down her flawless stomach to the button on her jeans. I hook my first two fingers into the waistband and tug her toward me, my left hand grabbing behind her head, her loose ponytail coming undone easily. She's breathing hard and fast against my mouth, but pulls back from our kiss with a wet pop. Her eyes are deep, glinting green, pupils dilated and eyes wide. I can only imagine how I look in that moment. I'm sure I'm flushed and my eyes are probably wild with, I don't know what? Desire?

Everything slows in this moment. Quinn is looking so deeply into my eyes that I instinctively turn away, vulnerable and naked under her intense gaze. I feel her fingertips trace my face, lightly grip my chin and pull me in for a gentle, plump kiss. I can hear our breathing begin to slow, but my heart is throbbing out of my chest. I break the kiss and look at her inquisitively, surprised we stopped the rapid progression, but afraid to ask why. I didn't think I wanted to stop, but now that we have, I feel anxious about it.

As if she could read my mind she whispers quietly as she leans in to kiss me again, "It's getting late, and I don't think I can stop if we keep going…" Her hand is cupping my face, the other gently tugging my hand away from her naked stomach as I have been distractedly tracing shapes unbeknownst to me for the past few minutes. Then it hits me. _Late_, she said, _it's getting late… _FUCK, what time is it? I pull away from her just enough to find the clock in the kitchen, 10:15pm, where does the time go when I'm with this woman?

"Oh, fuck…" the curse comes out without thinking, "it is late. I should head out."

I feel the frown creep across my mouth, and try to hide it immediately. Her hands slide to my waist as I lean away from her against the countertop. The nakedness of her in this proximity is dissolving my responsibility awareness. I have to force my eyeballs up to look at her face, sighing in defeat, and nod silently to myself that it's probably better this way. I lean forward to kiss her gently, apologizing mentally for being my age and having to leave, and I pull her into a warm hug, maybe more for me than for her. As we step apart I realize how turned on this whole exchange has made me; I feel damp and sweaty and flushed and now the distance between us is making the cool air of the apartment very uncomfortable on my skin. I glance back at Quinn and see her visibly shudder from the same feeling. I decide it's appropriate to help her locate her shirt that must be somewhere in this kitchen. Once she is safely clothed and away from the ravenous stare I know I have been subjecting her to while she is partially naked, she walks me to her front door trying to force me to take leftovers.

"You know I can't just traipse into my house carrying a mountain's worth of food when I'm supposed to be eating at my friend's house." I hear the flirt before I realize I'm saying it. "Besides, it gives me another reason to come by, food is very enticing." A grin lights across my face when I see her eyes dip down to my lips and back to my eyes, nodding silently.

"Eating at your friend's house, huh?" She grins mischievously before adding quietly, "I would like that, you know, you coming by another time." Her hand reaches out to run her knuckles against mine. It feels very natural turning my palm up to hold her hand, so I do, and we both glance down at the innocent gesture.

"See you Tuesday? At work?" The last part feels necessary to add. I don't want to imply that I will see her anywhere else, I mean, this isn't a "thing," is it? Like a "thing" we do outside of the context of work/patient care? I decide to mull this over in the car ride home.

"Yeah, text me when you get home so I know you made your curfew and survived the ride." She is smiling but I know that this is a serious request- survive the car ride and the parental interrogation. Traffic gods be merciful; my watch reads 10:21 pm at the moment.

After one last quick peck and hug, I'm walking – no, sprinting – to my car, once I am out of sight of her front door. I have to make it all the way across town and through two highway exits in 30 minutes, "at the latest," my mother's words ringing in my ears. I toss the car in drive and immediately call home, letting her know I am on route and will be there soon. Then I find myself studying the roads, side roads, traffic light placement and route home, subconsciously making mental notes of a trip I will be very familiar with as the days progress.

I am in my house, sitting on my bed, at 10:48pm. That has got to be a new record for speed, and safety, from that area to my house. My mother was reading some trashy romance novel when I walked in. She asked how the project went, what it entailed, if I had finished, and when I would be submitting it so she could know when my grades would be out for it. Those are hard answers to come up with when such things don't actually exist, but I managed to report some bogus statistics and timelines for her.

I walked past my brother's room, where he was enveloped in the glow of a video game, and closed the door to my room, immediately feeling like a weight had been lifted off my shoulders. The car ride home had been a silent one; no music, just me observing and seeing things I hadn't noticed before: the surprisingly calming metronome-like rhythm of the blinker, the quiet darkness of the back roads, the mild squeal of the tires on the driveway when I pulled in at home. I made a mental note of the last bit, so as to slow down my approach in the future; no one needs physics to ruin their fun by announcing their belated arrival anywhere. I was thinking about everything and nothing throughout the trip. I remembered the taste of her tongue against mine, the feel of wanting hands and fingers, the smell of her house when I walked in, the feeling of my own arousal during these reminiscent thoughts. I like her, I like spending time with her and I like kissing her, amongst other things I am sure to enjoy with her. All of that surprises me, not scares so much as makes me nervous.

I wash up and brush my teeth before changing into sweats and a loose t-shirt. My phone is blinking when I get back to the bed, indicating a message.

Quinn_: Everything ok?_

Me (smiling to myself): _incredibly so, off to bed, ttyl?_

Quinn: _Good ;), sleep tight. xo_"

The last bit made me flush all over again, remembering the parking lot and then the kitchen. Thursdays were turning out to be my favorite days of the week.


	6. Chapter 5

**A/N: Hey Guys! Here's my largest chapter yet, lots happening in here...I'm having fun playing around with these characters, I hope you are enjoying the ride. Buckle up. :) **

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**Chapter Five: Fun with Texts…No Pain, no gain**

The weekend following our second "date" was uneventful. I wrapped up my homework and took advantage of my pent-up energy to put a dent in the following week's assignments. Quinn was preoccupied with a work conference over the weekend and into the late night on Tuesday so I didn't see her at the clinic that day, but it was just as well. I used the time to figure out what the hell I was getting into. And after a full five days of introspection and thought, I had come to the conclusion that…I had no fucking clue what I was doing. Success!

School was monotonous and bland. My friends were engaging in their own right, but couldn't keep my interest. But texting with Quinn made Wednesday fly by. Technology is a beautiful thing. Twitter, Facebook, Tumblr, so many avenues of play and connection, it's almost impossible to disconnect, unless you're Amish, or really looking to avoid something or someone. You can learn about Los Angeles' trending topics in Physics class if you can stealthily surf your smart phone under the desk. Thankfully, I go to a school with mandatory clothing that include short skirts (something I have newly grown to appreciate) and uniform sweaters with pockets. Cell phones are always within reach, even if they are prohibited. Quinn made it impossible to concentrate on Wednesday, Quinn made Wednesday fun.

7:35am: Quinn: _hey, have a great day, thinking about take-out…u?_

7:55am: Me: _Heya… J i love take-out, but the Color Purple is a great movie… No?_

9:45am: Quinn: _Purple is a royal color u kno, u don't think it's too much?_

10:05am: Me: _No, i think it may b my favorite thing, purple, er, purple clothes_

10:27am: Quinn: _who had on purple clothes? I vaguely remember purple lingerie, but clothes?_

11:01am: Me: _im in Physics, the momentum of this conversation reminds me of ur undergarments_

11:05am: Quinn: _pay attention, centrifugal forces could be valuable in the future…_

11:50am: Me: _i can only imagine what that means, mostly i am just thinking bout the taste of wine_

12:55pm: Quinn: _im getting no work done, wine during lunch is frowned upon…_

1:25pm: Me: _i hear there are sweeter wines out there, it's a learned taste, wondering how many classes it takes_

2:05pm: Quinn: _i took a renaissance weekend class, i can see if they have open spots for u_

2:35pm: Me: _i luv school! Learning is fun, do they offer tutoring?_

3:51pm: Quinn: _i just misspelled "endeavor" twice, bc I read your text like 5 minutes ago, twice, thx_

4:25pm: Me: _wait, r u in education? Do u tutor?_

5:25pm: Quinn: _ok, i don't kno how much i actually kno, but i am willing to share my knowledge_

6:05pm: Me: _i almost choked on my dinner, thx for making my Mom think i had a small stroke with that last text_

7:35pm: Quinn: _i kno the Heimlich_

8:25pm: Me: _cough, cough_

8:26pm: Quinn: _i hope i put my hands in the right place_

8:27pm: Me: _i should be studying for Espanol… but im researching "faking choking" on Google_

8:29pm: Quinn: _i have to see my friend now, but i will look into red cross classes_

8:41pm: Me: _have fun, let me know how that goes, i will look into boney dinner foods for Thurs_

9:41pm: Quinn: _so does that mean we are doing dinner tomorrow?_

10:05pm: Me: _depends on work i guess, maybe i have better plans… ;)_

10:06pm: Quinn: _hmm, now im jealous… who will u be tutored by if not me?_

10:10pm: Me: _i guess u r rite, see u tomoro?_

10:15pm: Quinn: _c u then, sweet dreams ;)_

10:16pm: Me: _feels like a restless nite, thnx :*_

10:20pm: Quinn: _Thai tomoro?_

10:21pm: Me: _sounds great, c u then :)_

Maybe now Wednesdays are my favorite day of the week…

Katie intercepted me at the locker twice on Thursday, once at lunch and once after school.

"What is going on with you?" she's staring at me, making me nervous by the intensity of her gaze. Not nervous like Quinn makes me, but nervous like I'm going to be yelled at… "I mean seriously, when have you ever been so damn happy? It's like this bullshit school is just a mild inconvenience to you. What is up?!" She is watching me closely, using her Columbo-like powers of scrutiny to uncover some hidden message in my suddenly sunny disposition.

"Listen, I'm just busy with work stuff and class is so overwhelming, I think I just need a break, or a breakdown is pending, you know? I've just decided to change my attitude and approach." I say it sincerely and with direct eye contact, and it sounds convincing even if it's a lie.

"You are so full of shit! I don't believe that Zen bullshit for a second, I mean seriously? Do you think that rehearsed monologue will work on me? I'm f'ing first in this horrible class; you think I can't smell a lie? It's a sign of weakness! It fuels me! Spill, now!" Katie squints and steps back while she sizes me up. God, I hate her predatory senses; I'm not even a threat to her! You think she would use her talents for good, not evil…

"Ugh! You are impossible! Why does there have to be some big conspiracy? Can't I just be happy? Can't I just be ambivalent to this crap?" I wave my hand around indicating our surroundings with frustration; my poorly-constructed cover is blown and I know it.

"You, ambivalent? The only person more motivated to get out of this school than me is you, and if you think I am intimidated by your psychotically cheerful mood change, then you are tragically confused. I just know you, and I know you are far too happy for a f'ing Thursday." She taps her foot impatiently as she crosses her arms with a huff. She's right. I'm totally screwed.

"Listen, I'm just figuring some stuff out, okay? When I know more I will have to tell you, I'm sure…" I concede, nothing can compete with Katie's determination for unveiling the truth.

"It's a guy isn't it?" She smirks, "Seriously? A smile from a dick? I expected so much more from you," she challenges jokingly, "although, it would make you a tidbit more normal." She winks and bumps my arm, encouraging the now playful turn of our conversation.

"No, I swear to the nuns, it's not a guy. I guarantee you. And when I figure shit out I will tell you… promise." Full eye contact. I mean every syllable. It terrifies me, but at the same time makes me feel a little better.

"Fine, you have one more day, then I need full details to decide if we need a friendervention. Seriously, your positivity is alarming." She narrows her eyes in suspicion, but agrees to drop it momentarily.

The ride to the clinic is an anxious one. I am excited to see her; should I be? I mean, I've dated plenty of guys. I put myself out further than I was comfortable plenty of times, but honestly I have never felt the way I feel with her. Like every touch and every minute is so electric. My flirtations, my conversations, they just come so easily, like breathing. I feel like I should be so overwhelmed by this, but I'm not. I feel very comfortable in Quinn's presence, but at the same time a little unsettled by my new environment. I hope this feeling resolves its inconsistency soon.

I check in at the clinic and immediately begin work. Today is a big day; I am being reviewed for my participation grade. Brian and I are meeting to discuss my progress, participation, teamwork and motivation utilizing the strict guidelines of my school's graduation requirements. I'm unnecessarily worried though because, all in all, it was a success. Brian reports that I work well under pressure, am flexible in working extra or fewer hours as need be with minimal notice and show "excellent intuition in problem solving." But perhaps the biggest compliment was "You have a great interpersonal communication with the patients. I see how you interact with Quinn and it's so effortless. You are going to be a great therapist some day if that's what you choose. You really have a way with people." It took all of my control not to spit my water all over my boss. Although I would agree my "interpersonal communication" with her is excellent, I can't help but remember how much I enjoy kissing her perfectly pink lips. Let's hope my ability to connect with my other patients isn't dependent on my kissing skills! The thought makes me chuckle, at which point Brian gives me a perplexed look that I can only respond to with a shrug because once again my mind has wandered off to an area of Quinn-filled images. I gently shake my head and offer an apologetic smile for my inattention before thanking him for his encouragement. I agree that this job suits me well, Quinn example aside. This is something I can see myself doing for a long time; it makes me glow with happiness. I feel like I fit somewhere; for the first time in a long time, this feels right.

Quinn comes in as the last appointment of the day, again. My mother has a "Girl's Night Out" tonight so I check in with my younger brother around 4pm and let him know I would be back between 10:30-11. Of course I had to guarantee a full week's worth of emptying the dishwasher, taking out the trash and scooping the cat litter to not tell Mom I would be out so late. Thankfully, "Girl's Night" typically means cosmopolitans at the local bar, so I will be in the clear as long as I'm home by midnight; but I have no ambition to push my luck. Work wraps up without incident at 5:15pm. In a stroke of unusual luck, I actually finish my workload before Quinn finishes her workout. I clock out and wait in my car in the parking lot, listening to a classmate's terrible covers of some great rock music as his senior class project. I abandon my commitment to his "artistic interpretation" at about song #3 and switched to the local Alt-Rock station. About fifteen minutes later Quinn limped out of her session, demonstrating more discomfort than usual. I hop out of the running car and lean against it as she approaches.

"Hey, you. Tough session?" A slight frown pulls across my mouth.

"Ugh…Brian was on rampage tonight!" she scowls glancing back to the clinic. "I see a hot bath and stiff drink in my future…" she mutters almost inaudibly while continuing her death stare at the clinic.

"Oh, well, hey, if you need a night to yourself, I totally understand. Why don't we catch up next week?" I blurt out as I backpedal. I don't want her to feel obligated to spend time with some high school kid if she is in agony. I can totally occupy myself, I have plenty of pent up frustration left over from last week I can burn through, although the thought of not seeing her tonight makes me surprisingly sad.

"Huh? No, what are you talking about? I meant with you, unless you have better plans?" She chuckles, recalling our past conversation, immediately putting me at ease with her megawatt smile.

"Um, okay, good, I was looking forward to last week's leftovers all day, although a bath sounds nice too." A wicked grin spreads across my face.

"Well, I hate to disappoint, but I kinda have my heart set on Thai tonight. The bath is always available for dessert." She immediately resumes the flirtation, like its breathing. I love this about her. "Not that I don't want to spend my night with you in the parking lot again, but, my place?" She interrupts my train of thought; all I can do is nod, mouth open like I'm catching flies, awesome.

The ride to her place is one of nervous anticipation. I park in "my" visitor spot after I pull into her condominium complex. This time I get out of my car right away, no need to coach myself, yet. She meets me halfway between our cars and tentatively reaches for my hand, grazing my knuckles with her fingers. I smile shyly and link my fingers with hers as she leads me to her front door. I'm again distracted by the beautiful fountain in the courtyard outside her door. I hadn't noticed last time that the small cherub at the top of the fountain is reaching forward and elegantly pouring cascading water from a clay pitcher into an illuminated basin below. I can imagine how relaxing it must be to sit on the benches surrounding the fountain during midday, when the sun peeks through the trellises and the flowers are open to the sun's rays. I make a mental note to ask her later what it's like during the day. My bet is that it's gorgeous.

She keys in and takes off her shoes, holding the door open for me to enter her abode. Again she checks herself out in the mirror, watching me in the reflection as I take off my coat and shoes, and place my purse on the floor. She has been nursing a significant limp since the walk to the car. She grimaces slightly and turns her head in an attempt to hide her discomfort.

I stepped forward and gently hold her elbow, "Hey, why don't you get more comfortable and take a load off? I feel confident in my takeout ordering skills to help out." I smile encouragingly, because seeing her uncomfortable makes me feel, well, it makes me _feel_. And that is a new thing for me, _feeling_. She smiles broadly and nods, allowing me to lead her to the couch. She stretches out on the couch and I pull her feet onto my lap as I take my position at the other end of the furniture.

"So, what did you have in mind? Hungry?" I can tell she is in pain, because her normal jovial flirtation is subdued today; she seems tired, distracted.

"Sorry, how about Thai? I have them on speed dial in the phone, they have great Pad Thai." She speaks slowly, scrunching her brow and gently rubbing her forehead with her hands.

"Got it! Just walk me through how to use this phone…" I am turning the cordless phone over and over in my hand, but it's very high tech, expensive-looking, with lots of buttons.

She chuckles and reaches forward, taking the phone from me easily. She presses the speed dial number for the restaurant and orders Pad Thai and something called a "Mee Katang," with Tofu. Today I packed extra cash, determined to pay for dinner this time around, unbeknownst to my hostess. Quinn put her head back on the armrest of the chair and closed her eyes, sighing deeply in discomfort. I decide this is a good moment to capitalize on our silence and start to gently massage her feet. There is a subtle smile on her lips as she settles more deeply into the couch. I work my way from her feet to her calves, gently massaging and kneading the muscles, until I reach her knees. I can see a little swelling in her right knee; the tenderness is evident further by the way she furrows her brows with her eyes closed as I run my fingers over it. I use the new technique that Brian taught me last week at the clinic, called uncorking. I move up her thigh and gently knead and squeeze her quadriceps before pushing the fluid from her knee up into the loosened muscle tissue above. After five minutes of work I can see the swelling has decreased, the furrow in her brow has subsided and the subtle smile has extended across her face.

"Mmm, thank you…" she mutters quietly.

"You are very welcome; can I get you some Advil or something to drink?" I'm unsure of how to proceed, I know that is what I would want if my knee hurt, but who knows if that's the right thing to do.

"I'm just sort of enjoying your touch right now, but thanks. I'm glad you didn't have better things to do tonight…" She slyly opens one eye, peeking out at me before smirking with half her mouth.

The door bell rings, saving me from the flush that has consumed my face. After I gently lower her legs, I pop off the couch and jog to the door before she can fight me over who is paying. I open the door, thank the delivery guy and pay him a generous tip to get him out of the doorframe as quickly as possible before Quinn wises up to what I'm up to. When I get back to the living room she is digging through her purse reaching for her credit card. I flash a bright smile, holding up the food and shrugging. She rolls her eyes in defeat but concedes easily. I unpack the food, pull out the chopsticks, and go to retrieve some plates from the kitchen. It takes me two solid attempts at cabinet-surfing before I find the right one, but eventually I am victorious in my search. When I get back to the living room she is sitting up. The fireplace is on again and this time I can hear a soft, low melody in the background.

"My, my, are you trying to seduce me with mood lighting and soft rock?" I am teasing her as I pass a plate and napkin across the couch.

"Why? Is it working?" That glint is back in those endless emerald eyes. She licks her lips, immediately drawing my focus. This is more like the Quinn I know.

"Hmm," I consider out loud, "yeah, I guess it is…"

I find myself reaching across the couch and moving the plate from her lap. When did I get so bold? Her eyes momentarily widen before she shuffles and changes her position on the couch. Without missing a beat she reaches out and grabs my shirt, hastily pulling me on top of her. I climb up her body with hungry kisses pressed against her mouth. My tentative approach of the other day is nowhere to be found. I prop myself up on my elbow. My other hand wraps around her neck, pulling her mouth closer to mine. Her tongue licks my bottom lip before sucking it into her mouth. The whimper that escapes me is involuntary as she pulls her teeth against my captive lip. Her hands run up and down my sides, lingering along my ribs, digging her nails into my clothed back. Her hips cant up against my core and she rolls her body against mine as we deepen the kiss. I can feel myself getting wet from the close contact and friction of our bodies; I want to feel her skin. I break the kiss with a loud pop, reaching between us to grab the hem of her shirt. She sits up to assist me, her hand grasping my neck pulling me to her for uncoordinated sloppy, kisses as I pull her fitted tee over her arms and discard it somewhere behind the couch. She takes advantage of our new position and tugs at my shirt, fingers raking light scratches up my sides and back in the process. The sensation sends lightning to my stomach and a low hiss slips out. A devilish grin flashes across her face as she pulls me back on top of her. I gently shrug off her hands and let her fall back onto the couch, flaxen blond hair splaying everywhere. I take a moment to appreciate the perfect body below me: heaving chest, enveloped in black lace as though it were made just for her. All I can see are flushed cheeks and neck begging for attention, deep green eyes penetrating into my soul, desperate for pleasure. I start by kissing along her jaw line, licking under her ear and gently sucking the skin above her collarbone. She turns her head and lengthens her neck increasing the availability of her tender flesh to my desire. I run my palm over her firm side and up to a wanting breast and gently knead the soft tissue while I nip and lick at her clavicle. She moans in appreciation and her hands run through my hair pulling loose the tie and tousling my light brown tresses. "Mmmm," she purrs as my mouth found a clothed breast, wetting the fabric with my tongue before gently nibbling at an erect nipple.

I am flying on autopilot, not sure what to do, but letting my body lead the way. When I started to think too much, my movements halt, as though I am suspended in the moment, unable to proceed further or to stop. With that, I banish my thoughts and let my carnal needs win. Before I could stop myself my hands slipped under her back, unclasping her bra in one quick movement. A quick gasp escaped her mouth as I continued to kiss and lick the top of her breasts while I slowly pulled the straps off each shoulder with an agonizingly slow pace. Although the initial undress was quick, the seduction now is slow and teasing. She arches her back and assists with disrobing the unnecessary article. My hands roam over naked flesh, squeezing and rolling a nipple between my thumb and forefinger, kissing between the valley of her breasts, sucking the soft underside of the right, then the left. Her hands are running up my sides, gripping at my shoulders, scratching at my back as I worship thesmooth skin on her stomach, my hands staying at the ample flesh of her chest while I slide down her torso. "Wait…" it comes out like a whispered beg- but loud enough for me to stop mid kiss at her navel. I pull off far enough to look at the naked top of the woman below me. Until this moment I was feeling with my eyes closed, kissing with my mouth, finding the paths that elicited the moans and groans I was desperate to hear. I found myself staring at her bare chest, eyes following the valley between her perky breasts, along her sculpted abs to the soft flesh below her navel. Her hands are on my chest, gently pressing me up, halting our progression, eyes wild with desire but soft worry lines along her forehead signifying concern, about what I'm not sure, but my brain shakes me from my lust induced haze.

"Wait, maybe we should slow down?" It comes out as a breathy question, not particularly convincing or authoritative.

A smile sneaks across my face, as I glance down her body below me, eyes jumping from waist to lips, over soft curves and pinked skin. "Why? Were we going fast? Seems like you still have pants on…"

I'm teasing her now, my hand gently ghosting over her abdomen, finger tracing her waistband. Her hips buck up against mine, responding to my touch, betraying her hesitation.

"I just, I don't know, this is all new to you, I…want, to take it at your pace? You know?" Her eyes are darting between mine, genuine concern flashes across clouded green eyes.

Her hand slides up from my chest, gently cupping my cheek, thumb running over my swollen bottom lip. I slip my tongue out, gently licking the tip of her thumb, opening my mouth, inviting her thumb to come closer, be deeper. I suck the tip of her thumb into my mouth, sucking and teasing it with my lips and teeth. I watch the resolve fade from her face as she begins to lift off the couch, bringing her mouth closer to mine; she's licking her lips without thought: I am winning the game. I don't want to think about it, I want to try it, experience it, I want to do it. I don't want to let myself stop and think about it, I don't want the panic of it. That is for later, that is for the privacy of my car, or my bedroom, or my own mind. For now I want to be here, be present, feel the surge travel from my lips to my toes; like a current of electricity that gets stronger and stronger the more I push my boundaries. Quinn is sitting up now. I'm straddling her hips and sucking on her thumb, gently biting and licking the tip of her finger. Her hand snakes up my neck and pulls me close, "Bed, now." It's short and to the point, but I'm positively saturated by the command.

The trip to the bedroom is a hungry, savage one. Kisses and desperate hands palm naked flesh, pulling at clothing that separates burning skin from each other. By the time we hit the bed she is in a black lace thong and nothing else, my pants were a casualty of the hallway, and I'm thanking the heavens I wore a cute matching bra and panty set. She sits at the edge of the bed, hands pulling my hips to hers, and I crawl on top of her, straddling her near naked core, fingers dragging down her back with deep, hungry kisses resulting in gasping breaths for air. I walk her body up the bed by crawling further up her torso, spreading her thighs with a well placed knee. I know what I am doing, but I have no idea how; it just feels so right. I feel the heat of her sex on my thigh immediately, and an involuntary shiver cuts through me like a knife. Through hooded eyes I feel her watching my reactions, almost fearful that I may get up and bolt out of here. But I want to be nowhere else right now, even though my heart is hammering in my chest and adrenaline is making my decisions for me. I don't want to be any place but here.

Quinn bucks her hips, rolling her core against my leg, searching for friction. Her hands are pulling me impossibly closer to her, weaving into my hair and hand firm at my low back. Her hand slides down to my ass and clutches tightly, encouraging my thigh to grind against her. One hand is placed beside her head on the comforter, propping me up, the other is tracing a line with dull nails down her side. I can feel her quiver beneath my fingers as I drag my nails across a flexing stomach. She whimpers as I pull my thigh away from her wetness but a quick moan replaces the sounds when I begin to walk my fingers under the band of her thong. I'm not sure what to expect, but if the slickness on my thigh is any indication I'm in for something hot and wet. I slip my finger tips through wet folds, her mouth engulfing mine, tongue drawing swollen lips into hers. I slide my fingers up and down curiously before finding the swollen bud at the top. The instant my fingers touch, Quinn arches her back off the bed, bites gently down on my bottom lip and fingers dig into my back. I start with slow, easy circles, fingers slipping out of place occasionally from the frantic movement of her hips against my hand and the impossible wetness. She unhooks my bra with uncoordinated, jerky movements, but manages to slip one hand under the loosen lace cup and palm my breast before pinching and tweaking my nipple. The sensation sends a hot surge between my legs and I find myself choking back a low moan of my own. It's taking all my concentration to keep the pace of my fingers on her clit, but I find myself speeding up without any real intention. She turns her head slightly, tucking her forehead into my shoulder as I feel the tension increase in her body, stomach muscles twitch, hands clutch at loose hair and fingers with white knuckles have a death grip on the comforter below. I take the sweat damp skin of her neck into my mouth, gently sucking the skin as I increase the speed of my circles, her breathing is ragged and I can feel her heart pounding against my chest as her breath stops momentarily and her body seizes below me. I slow my circles as she rides out the waves of pleasure, leaving sloppy kisses on my neck and cheek. Her hand darts between us and grasps my wrist with vice-like strength, pulling my hand away from her with a deep sigh and a curse. Her face is flushed, green eyes glowing with fatigue and pleasure.

"Holy fucking shit…what was that?!" The question comes out sounding mildly stunned and confused. Her head is back on the pillow, eyes up at the ceiling, she glances back to me, hovering over her, equally out of breath, but mine is for a very different reason. She must have seen the alarm cross my face before I could stifle it, because she leaned forward and kissed me gently on the corner of my mouth. "I just, can't…, are you sure you've never been with a girl before? Because you coulda fooled me…" a gentle chuckle rolls through her body, coming out more like a purr than a statement.

I rolled my eyes in embarrassment and turned my head away from her, allowing myself to roll onto my back. The cool fabric of the comforter on my sweat-sheeted skin alerted me to just how sensitive everything felt right now. I feel like I have never experienced so many sensory inputs at once before. I smell the scent of her perfume on the sheets and blankets below me, a golden glow emanating from a perfectly placed bedside lamp. She rolls to her side, propping herself on her elbow, gently walking her fingertips along my abdomen, each touch eliciting a lightning bolt to my core, up to my face and down to my toes. Something about her touch is electrifying to my skin, like my nerves all fire at once without control. I wonder if this is what a stroke feels like… Quinn smiles a lazy grin down at me, gently tugging the already unsnapped bra off my shoulders. Instinct brings my hands up to cover my chest, I'm not necessarily bashful about my body, but I am feeling very vulnerable right now.

"Hey… I want to see you," she says softly, leaning in to kiss my temple. My hands loosen their grip on my chest, but stay put, protecting my…heart? Two more perfectly placed kisses on the corner of my mouth before she gently slides her tongue across my lip gets the response she wants, my hands fall to the sides willingly. She gently glides her fingers down my side, along a bare breast, to rest on my hip before following the same trail back up to my arm. I close my eyes because it feels safer this way but I can feel her eyes running over me, leaving heat in their wake as they travel from face to hips. Her breathing has returned to normal and she is leaning close to my chest, her breath ghosting across the top of my breast before she moves forward to press a chaste kiss to the tender skin. She walks her fingers down from my collarbone to gently palm my bare breast, her mouth kissing down to my nipple on the other side. The moment warm, wet tongue encircles my erect nipple a shudder resonates through my body and a low moan escapes my lips. I can feel her smile against my breast while she sucks the moistened bud into her mouth. "Quinn…" it came out as a whisper. My hand grips the back of her neck, encouraging her mouth, begging her tongue to continue. She darts her tongue across the swollen flesh, nipping gently. The sensation was driving me crazy and I felt her hand at my hip, tugging at the lace panties… my eyes popped open with surprise. Was I ready for this? I mean me doing it was one thing, but receiving? My pulse quickened and my breathing became rapid; not because I was turned on (I was, undoubtedly), but I was also very, very nervous.

Just when I thought my panic would become obvious on my thinly veiled emotional mask, my phone rang, loudly. The unmistakable sound of "I Hate You So Much Right Now" by Kelis rang from the pocket of my jeans, deposited somewhere in the doorway of her bedroom. I launched off the bed in a flash, Quinn tumbled off to the side and almost hit the floor. The look of shock on her face was both momentarily hilarious and terrifyingly sincere.

"OH MY GOD!" I frantically grabbed my bra and clipped it on while running to my pants, searching for my socks…where the hell are they?

"Rachel, what? What the hell is wrong?" She is sitting up, one arm across her chest the other running fingers through her recently sexed hair, "and who did you assign that ringtone too? It's mildly offensive…" A smirk creeps across her face.

I whipped my head around, pulling on my pants and buttoning them while balancing on one foot, "That's the problem! It's my brother, who NEVER calls, emphasis on NEVER, which means one of two things: Mom is dead or is coming home early…we can only hope it's the answer behind door number one, otherwise I am the one who is going to end up dead…"

I reach into the back pocket of my jeans and grab the phone, answer it on the 7th ring, "…Hello?" I'm out of breath.

"Rach, Mom just called, she has to drive home her friend, too many cosmos, but she will be here in like twenty minutes, so, umm, you probably should come home, I will try to stall her, but it will cost you," he laughs a malevolent low chuckle, BASTARD!

"Ugh, of course it will. Leaving now, thanks for the warning."

Quinn has this pained look of confusion on her face, "wait, is this like some Punk'd candid camera thing? Are you seriously running out of my house, half dressed, because your Mom is coming home?" The tone is challenging; she is annoyed.

And now I am embarrassed, the heat flushes my face, "Listen, I'm so, so, sorry, but, yeah, I have to go. And I'm really, truly, unhappy about it, trust me," the frown pulls at my mouth before I can stop it.

Her brow lessens, and I see a little sadness in her eyes, a sadness that makes me feel terrible, and wish I was years older than I am. So I decide to distract her from the pink elephant in the room: in a bra and skin tight jeans I saunter back to the bed, kneeling on the comforter, hands reaching for her naked flesh. She slips easily into my embrace, soft kisses lingering across her neck as I work my way up to her ear. I can feel all of her naked body against my chest, hips pressed against mine; the heat coming off of her body is intoxicating.

I nibble at her ear lobe and whisper, "I am really, really disappointed that we didn't get to finish, but think of all the naughty dreams I'm going to be living with until I see you again…" A low groan rolls from the back of her throat, vibrating against the lips I press firmly against her neck.

"This is agony… you are practically naked, in my bed and…leaving?" I hear the sadness in her voice, and lick and suck gently her pulse point, trying to distract her from the inevitable- I have to leave because I am in high school and this beautiful, older woman wants me but I can't do shit about it but leave, because I have a curfew…ugh.

"Well, we have to be creative and efficient with our time together, I think it's kinda hot," I'm flirting ferociously and now gently run my hands up her sides, lingering at the soft curves of naked breasts, kissing her collarbone and gently sucking the skin into my mouth. She leans into my touch and lets me leave a very subtle mark below her collarbone just north of her nipple. "You know, that is going to need follow up care and observation," I breathe against plump lips as I kiss away her disappointment.

She chuckles and glances down, "Nice work, but I think you're right, this will need to be monitored…closely." She is kissing back, hesitant at first, but now deepening the kiss.

"Uh huh," is all I can manage.

She breaks the kiss, leaning back and making that soul melting direct eye contact, "you probably need to leave, so I can see you again, not in a coffin," a small giggle escapes her, but I hear the disappointment, less audible than before, but present.

I kiss her gently once more, pulling her in for a tight embrace before I scoot back, letting my gaze drift over her perfect body, naked except for a damp, black lace thong, large green eyes boring into my face. "Walk me out?" it comes out as more of a beg than a request, heat flushes my face. She nods, her hand gently entwining with mine, fingers clasped she tugs me from the bed. We gather up my clothes, find my keys and she walks me to the door, this time with a small Tupperware of food.

"This," she points to the container, "is Mee KaTang, it's delicious and I expect you to eat some, because it's my favorite, and we didn't consume any food tonight, at all."

I can't help but laugh as I take the container, realizing I'm starving, "Oh, I don't know about that, I think you gave me plenty to chew on…" Engaging her in flirtation is far too easy. It feels wrong…almost. A quick grin flashes across her face, more perfect teeth against unbelievably delicious swollen, pink lips. I would kill to stay the night, I know that when I see her smile, but I knew that before too. She threw on her tank top hastily on the walk to the front door, but black thong and tank top do little to subdue my lust and stares.

"I had a good time," it comes out almost inaudibly shy as she kisses my mouth to say good-bye.

"I had a good time too, but I have grandiose plans for next time," she purrs as I suck her lip between mine, and run my tongue along it teasingly.

"Are you free this weekend?" It comes out before I can stop myself, "I don't think I can wait until Tuesday…" Her eyes flash with desire; I know my face is red with embarrassment and want.

"Yeah, sure, let's, umm, make some plans." The response is fast, wanting, I feel the same way.

"'K, talk to you later," I lean in and kiss her once more, letting my gaze linger on her perfect body before I close the door and jog back to my car. The prospect of another law breaking speed trip in my near future increases my heartbeat, but nothing like her touch did.

I made it home, parked and threw on pajamas with twenty seconds to spare. My brother met me at the front door, reminding me of our agreement; God only knows what I owe him this time, to be negotiated at a further date. I crawled into bed just as my mother opened the front door downstairs. I flipped onto my side, shut off my light and feigned sleep when she popped her head in the door. PHEW! I made it. When she closed the door, I paused and listened for a minute before texting Quinn:

Me: _Woah, can't believe it, still alive, but humming from our dinner, ended too soon :)"_

Quinn (instantly): "_me too, pad thai is delicious, worked up an appetite from earlier ;)"_

Me (with a blindingly proud smile, and glad she can't see it): "_Nite lady ;)_."

I am wide awake still, so I sit up and polish off half of the Mee Katang before I sneak downstairs and put it into a bag for lunch tomorrow, knowing the entire time I will be smiling at the memory of tonight. I manage to ninja my way back up stairs without so much as a creak as I climb into bed, exhausted, but surprisingly happy. I close my eyes and know immediately that sleep is moments away, and I can't wait for what dreams may come.

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_;) Well then. That was fun, wasn't it? Let me know what you think. Thanks!_


	7. Chapter 6

**A/N: Woah! I got lots of great feedback on that last chapter, thanks! Here's another one ;)**

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**Chapter Six: The Aftermath**

I fell asleep the moment my eyes closed. I must have hit the alarm a dozen times before finally crawling out of my warm bed into the cool spring morning air's assault. With just enough time to shower, dress and drive like a maniac to get to school I didn't have much time for self-reflection. But the school day's activities didn't engage me enough to keep my mind from wandering over the events of last night. I was greeted with a "J" text around 3rd period, further contributing to my growing mental anguish. At some point I had zoned out of Advanced Physics and Movement Science and into my own head. Did that really happen last night? It feels like a very vivid, extremely stimulating, full color dream. The smells, the warm glow of the bedside light, the way my fingers trace her skin…feel like they are happening right now, in this very moment. I can taste her mouth on mine when I moisten my lips with my tongue, I hear the sound of her moans ringing in my ears while I doodle on the notepad in front of me. I'm confused. The feelings I am having are so brilliant, so all encompassing. Like I can't stop thinking about her or last night, although my brain is screaming for me to run and ignore and forget…but I don't know why.

It's not that I'm freaked out by what happened; well, if I'm being truthful, maybe I am, a little. But I just feel so unsettled, like my safe little world is crumbling around me. I have this gradually building feeling that my foundation is rumbling with a slow, but enveloping earthquake. Something inside me feels broken. Like its contents are seeping into my insides, but I can't tell if its warmth or frost. It's just something, something new and different and, well, scary. I'm in the process of having a full-on silent breakdown and not paying attention to the teacher, who has taken this precise moment to call on me. When I don't respond after the umpteenth time she calls on me, Katie blurts out the answer, simultaneously kicking my chair- jarring me back to reality. I feel my face flush as I stare down at the notepad in front of me covered with nothing but poorly drawn spirals and cubes. The rest of the class wraps up without incident, but my cover has been blown. It's only a matter of time before Katie corners me, and rightly so, I'm a fucking mess.

Like clockwork, Katie grabs my elbow as we walk out of class, even though it was expected I still jump slightly. It feels like my head is in a cloud, like the air is too thin to think properly.

"What the hell is going on with you?" it comes out in a concerned whisper inches from my ear.

She is steering me away from the salmon stream of students in the hallway into an open janitor's closet, quickly closing the door behind us. Katie is a painfully consistent person. She is amazingly sarcastic with perfect timing, incredibly intelligent, crass, and blunt. She is also witty, a genius pianist with an ear for music I have never seen anywhere else, but above all, she is observant, too fucking observant. Katie never misses a human reaction, big or small. Being her best friend is a blessing and a curse, because nothing, I mean _nothing_, goes unseen by her. I am both relieved and terrified to be in an enclosed space with an emotional clairvoyant.

"What? What are you talking about?!" It comes out too harsh and too quickly to be convincing. My eyes are everywhere but on her face, because I know they will betray me, and tell all of my secrets, all of the lies.

"Rach, I mean it, what's wrong? Are you okay?" Her voice is softer now. Her hand has slid down from my elbow and is gently holding my hand in a loose embrace, I can feel her concern in her touch; my eyes are drawn to hers like a magnet, the pull too strong to avoid.

"I, I just, I, fuck. I think we need to talk…" it comes out as a puny whisper. I can feel the sting of tears biting the back of my eyes, begging to come out. I have no idea why I am all of a sudden so goddamn emotional. I am never emotional. I never cry; I never feel self-doubt or pity. I am confident and strong and smart and absolutely above this pathetic human reaction.

"Oh, Rach, what happened? Did someone hurt you? I will fucking rock someone if they did…" her eyes are scanning my face with an intensity that causes her brow to furrow slightly. Her lips are pulled into a thin line and her grasp on my hand has tightened. I see anger mixed with concern flash across her eyes, large hazel saucers under perfectly applied black mascara coated lashes. Make-up is an art for her, like her music; her face is always flawless.

"No, it's not that, I'm fine, I swear." I squeeze her hand encouragingly, her creased forehead relaxing, faintly. The next words came out without any self control, a blurted statement that until this moment I had kept to myself. I hadn't even thought it through completely, just danced around it in my own mind: "I met someone, um, well, it's more than that, um, I slept with someone, I think? And, well, I'm terrified, because, um, well, you see, the someone is a _she_."

The words tumbled out of my mouth in such quick succession it took Katie a full five agonizing seconds of puzzled staring to actually understand what I had said- then her eyes tripled in size and she grabbed both of my hands in hers, forcibly.

"Woah, back up… you met someone? K. And you think you slept with someone? But you aren't sure? And, perhaps, this is the bigger picture here, it's a _girl_?!"

The look on her face isn't one of condemnation or criticism, but one of sincere love and confusion. That's it for me- the dam breaks, the tears start with a ferocity that I can't resist, silent at first, but the shudders and hiccups overcome my fast-dwindling resolve. In a matter of moments I am audibly sobbing, trying to hide my face with my hands and desperately trying to silence the cracking sound coming from my chest. All I know in this instant is that everything feels so big and overwhelming that breathing feels like an impossible task. Even though it seems like it's a million miles away, I hear Katie whisper from somewhere in front of me, "Oh, honey…" then I feel her arms wrap me into a tight embrace, pulling my head to her shoulder, her cardigan soaking the hot tears away from my face. I'm not sure how long we stayed like this, me crying and shaking, her trying to hold me together. Eventually the feeling of the enormity of the situation started to fade. My sobs lessened, and now only an embarrassed sniffle and hiccup remain. I must look like a raccoon after a rough night of drinking and bare knuckled boxing.

Katie loosens her hold and leans back from me slightly, brushing my hair from my face with one hand, "Hey, I'm here okay? Let's talk about it. It's okay, you know that right?" She is looking directly into my eyes, and I can see the trace of tears on her cheek, just a few, but tears nonetheless. I pull my gaze away from her, looking down and nod almost imperceptibly. "Hey- I mean it, it's okay," her hand is at my chin, forcing me to meet her gaze, a sadness in her eyes makes my chest want to crack open again, but I nod through it, my red, puffy eyes locked on hers. "And here I was thinking you had gotten grounded for the rest of high school over some minor offense… little did I know this was all about a little punany and lady loving!" her familiar hearty chuckle breaking the tension of this dank little room.

I couldn't suppress the giggle that slipped out, a smile sneaking across my lips, "Shut up, asshole…" I nudge her and roll my eyes exaggeratedly.

"You know that I hate when you do that! It makes you look possessed. Linda Blair has nothing on your eye roll, it's freaky." She is gently pushing me back, a smile lighting up her face. She wipes at the dried tear tracks on her own face before fully appraising the hot mess that is mine with a scrutiny that makes me uncomfortable. "Oh this will not do, we need to address this immediately- I cannot have you strolling out of here like someone walking in from a monsoon after a cheap mall makeover from one of those terrible kiosks manned by some pimply-faced gay boy with an affinity for RuPaul's Drag Race…" Katie is already wiping under my eyes and fussing with my hair when she says this, pausing briefly before chastising herself, "Not the best time to criticize something gay, McCarthy. But still, your face needs fixing."

I'm wholeheartedly laughing at this point, at the absurdity of the moment, the frantic ping pong of Katie's thought process and the unexpected relief I feel. After a few minutes of what I imagine it feels like to be groomed by a mother cat I am finally presentable enough to emerge from the filthy closet. The irony is not lost on me or Katie as she mumbles something that sounds like "speaking of coming out of closets…" followed by an evil chuckle and nudge with her elbow.

It's lunchtime for the juniors, so our absence has most likely gone unnoticed. Katie recommended approaching the Dean and letting her know I had a staff meeting at my "volitold" job, that I had to attend for my progress review and had to miss the last two periods of the day. She was already leaving at lunch to go to a "doctor's appointment" even though we both knew she had nothing planned but hitting up her boyfriend's band practice and probably getting laid later. I decided she was wise beyond her years and checked myself out of school, since it practically never happened and I was an expert forger of my parent's signature. I was in the parking lot within ten minutes. She met me there shortly after, and we both drove separately to my house. My father went on a "man's weekend" with his poker buddies right after work this morning and wouldn't be home until Sunday afternoon- so my house was a safe place to go to skip school. I was happy to have Katie with me. I didn't want to sit through a slow Friday at school with all these _feelings_ swirling around my head and stomach and making me nauseated with confusion. Katie ordered sushi for delivery, an assortment of maki and sashimi, soup and a noodle dish. She called her boyfriend and told him something came up, that she would talk to him later. I could hear Logan's disappointment in the earpiece of her phone, but she shrugged him off and shot an annoyed look at the phone before hanging up. Then she grabbed a blanket, reached for my hand and pulled me to the couch, turning to face me slightly before tucking us both in.

"Okay. So no more distractions, we are unsupervised and have food on the way. Tell me everything, and I mean EVERYTHING… because it seems like you have been very busy while I have been preparing for my recital." Her eyes were shining and warm. I had almost forgotten that her piano recital was fast approaching; she had been working on a piece that she had been composing for the past two months to be played for a group of college recruiters at a music forum in two weeks. She was at the top of our class, taking college-level everything and practicing hours and hours a week, but she had yet to determine what she wanted to do when she went to college. She was heavily recruited by music schools, Juilliard, Berklee, Oberlin, New England Conservatory. But she had just as much attention from the likes of Harvard as she did from Boston University. She could do anything she wanted, and what she wanted, in this moment, was to talk to me about my _girl_ problems.

"Ugh, it's inevitable I guess huh?" A sheepish smile spread across my face as I felt the heat climb up my neck. I had no idea what was coming over me…

"Yup… Spill!" She winked and shuffled closer to me, at full attention. So I told her everything and I did tell her EVERYTHING. About the ice bag and the parking lot, the dinners at her place and last night's almost-dinner. The more I told her the wider her eyes got, but she said nothing, just nodded and "uh hmm'd" occasionally to let me know she was following.

"…and so when Cody called and told me to get the hell home I left, because what the hell else was I supposed to do? I couldn't just stay there, I mean I have a curfew and I already pissed off my parents with the impromptu dinner and make-out session last week… And now I don't know what the fuck I'm doing. I mean seriously? I didn't even think I was gay…but I have been acting pretty gay lately I guess…" the last part slipped out unintentionally, I was staring off into space and said it more to myself than for my audience. She cackled and brought her hand to her mouth in shock at the noise that escaped.

"Sorry, I don't mean to laugh, but I mean, c'mon, that was a little hilarious." A wide grin encompassed the parts of her face not inhabited by her massive saucer eyes. I couldn't help by giggle and smile back. "And I would say you have been acting pretty gay lately, I mean you did have sex with an older woman, who sounds hot by the way, and kudos to the Lothario-like behavior you have been rocking. I mean, I had no idea you could charm the pants off both sexes…I am impressed by your new found talent." She nudged my arm and I swatted at her hand.

"You are such an ass…" but I was laughing, she was right, this situation was unbelievable. "So, what now?" I asked with a large sigh and defeated shrug.

"Well, first things first, thank you for telling me. Also I think it's pertinent to tell you that safe sex if a smart option if abstinence is out of the question [chuckling], and thirdly, do you like her? Because if you like her and she likes you, then I think you have your answer." She shrugged her shoulders and raised her hands as if to motion that the writing was on the wall the whole time. Maybe I was too stressed and overwhelmed to see the big picture, because I narrowed my eyes and just looked at her inquisitively. "Rach…seriously? OMG, okay, you like her, she turns you on? You obviously make her feel good, what's the problem?! I say you let your freak flag fly and bag this girl. You need to let off a little steam, you are wound wayyyyy to tight, I mean, getting laid should be priority numero uno for you. How long has it been anyway?" she is gently shaking her head in disapproval.

I guess it had been more than a few months; I hadn't had any _real_ interest in anyone in a while, maybe ever. Not in the way Quinn controlled my thoughts, the way I couldn't stop thinking about her or finding things in my day that reminded me of something she did or said or wore, or didn't wear for that matter.

"See? You are thinking about that little hottie right now, I can see that stupid grin on your face indicating you are no longer listening to my infinite wisdom and are instead lusting after perfect blond hair and nice abs… And I have to say I am a little surprised you are interested in a blonde, I mean that is sooooo terribly anti-feminist," she quipped, quickly leaning back against the couch. She was right, again, goddamn it, and I was in full, beet-red blush. I was caught thinking about Quinn; I was in way over my head this time.

"Yeah, who knew? Blondes? Ha…" I smiled at the thought of her flaxen hair, tousled last time I saw her.

The sushi arrived soon and we snuggled into the couch with a few stolen Coronas and a blanket, watching bad reality television and chatting animatedly about Katie/Logan, school, work, and our parents/families. Katie had three sisters, all appropriately named something Gaelic and impossible to spell- Katie's full name was Catriona, pronounced "ka-tree-na;" she found the whole thing preposterous since although her last name is as Irish as can be (McCarthy), all of her traceable family was French Canadian in the past two centuries. She was also the youngest to much older parents, and her sisters (Ruari, Saoirse, and Caireann) were all either in college or marrying other non-Irish Irish folk, perpetuating the fable. It was hilarious that Katie's boyfriend was named Logan since for the longest time she only dated Rauls, Jorges, Estebans and Viktors. It just so happened to work out that Logan was her perfect stoner, musician undeRachver equal. They were paired perfectly; her intelligence and wit flowed easily with his magical ability to put everyone at ease. It was extremely helpful that he was older and lived with his friends. We had a place to crash and plenty of liquor whenever we needed it. Logan was a stand up guy, tall, lanky brunette with hazel eyes and an easy smile. He, ironically enough, was from a very Irish family, off the boat Irish, "Mum" still curses in Gaelic kind of Irish, and he came from a gaggle of equally tall and handsome brothers. Katie and I often joked that her family and his would just pair off and further the "Irish lineage" at some commune for fair-skinned gingers with no defense to the sun's rays which would ultimately be the source of demise of their bloodline. At which point Katie would always laugh and tell me, "but there are not enough vowels in the whole world to support such a wedding party and guest list like that."

It was during this mental digression that Katie turned to me with a very serious look on her face, "In all seriousness, what are you going to do? I mean, I hope you fuck the broad, but are you okay about it?" She is joking, but I can hear the sincerity underlying her tone.

"I want to, I mean, I can't stop thinking about it. She just gives me so many…_feelings_, you know? I know it sounds stupid, but everything just feels so fucking vivid with her." I'm being honest; I mean every word, no premeditation, just truthful, free thought.

"I'm happy for you, you know that? I am proud of you for even trying something different. You have been missing something for a while now, and I hope this helps you find it…" Katie gently reaches out and strokes my hand; the affection is welcome. I have so many emotions about this right now, having her with me in this moment makes everything feel so manageable, not so overwhelming. In the past three years of our friendship I could probably count on two hands the amount of natural physical affection we have shared more than hugs and occasional hand holding. Neither one of us is particularly touchy-feely, but this feels like an ordinary occurrence right now. She put her head on my shoulder, closing her eyes, letting out a long sigh.

I tucked my chin and rested my head on hers, "Thank you for being with me and talking to me. I guess I needed to deal with it more than I realized…" The confession came out quietly.

"Of course, you can tell me anything. I'm glad you told me, 'cuz you were a hot mess for a bit. I'm happy it wasn't the beginning of a psychotic break." She uttered the last part with a snicker before reaching for her cell phone to set an alarm. We had an hour or so before my brother got home from school, so plenty of time for a nap and to clean up our evidence.

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Don't you just love Katie? I hope everyone has a Katie in their life. She's the damn shit. ;) Kisses!


	8. Chapter 7

**A/N: Hey guys. So, I got some really great feedback and I tweaked the story a bit. I changed the first two chapters a lot so that the flow is better. Take a look, and let me know what you think. Thanks again for your reviews. :)**

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**Chapter Seven: Party Rockin'**

Katie stayed to help me clean up and then headed over to Logan's place before her parents got home from work. I was scrolling through the missed messages on my phone while laying on the bed when Cody came bounding in from school, launching his backpack against the wall of his room, the vibrations knocking a picture frame off my desk a few feet from me. I rolled my eyes in irritation but resisted the urge the throttle him because I wanted to be alone for a little bit longer. My phone was in my bag while Katie was here; I had two messages from Quinn:

Quinn: _how is ur day going?_

Ha, I thought, well I sort of told my best friend I think I'm gay, so, um, swell.

Quinn (a little more direct): _call me later, maybe get 2gether this wkend?_

Me (non-committal) :_J k, ttyl_

Then I wandered out of my room to face the Cody-monster.

He was in a surprisingly good mood today; I prepped a little after school snack for us both, even though I wasn't particularly hungry, and plopped down on the couch to watch a show with him. We're two years apart, he is fifteen and hormonally annoying, but all and all Cody is a great kid. He's extremely intelligent, into computers and video games; shy around girls but has lots of guy friends that share his interests. He is the same height as me right now, but I see a growth spurt in his near future- he is all arms and legs like a German Shepherd puppy just waiting to grow up. He has light, dusty brown hair like mine, traces of gold/blond in the summer sun. He has pretty grey/blue eyes, a contrast to my light brown, and wears glasses because the idea of touching his eye for contacts freaks him out. I totally get it, and am grateful I don't need glasses. If it weren't for his heinous brace face he would be very handsome. Right now he is laughing next to me, watching a rerun of Family Guy. I remind him at the commercial break that even though it's Friday, Mom wants his homework done tonight because he is going to Six Flags with his buddies for a birthday party tomorrow.

"Ugh, all right, when this is over, k? Geez you sound more and more like Mom every day," he sneaks a sly look over to me with a smirk. I gently shove him and threaten to never make his favorite after school snack again. It's an empty threat, we both know that, as he gets older I find these quiet moments with him very relaxing, because someday I won't have the opportunity to be around him like this.

College is fast approaching, everything will change. Even though everything feels like it's already changed for me, it feels so different. Cody trudges upstairs after his show ends, puts on some music and starts his homework. He goes to the same school as me, but usually catches a ride with his friend Ryan, who lives around the corner. It's way cooler to show up with Ryan than your sister, evidently. And honestly, I couldn't agree more; there is no part of me that wants to drive my little brother anywhere, especially that early in the morning. Thank God for coffee- mornings are not my best time of day.

Mom gets home a few hours later. I finished all my own work, played a game of Mario Kart with Cody when he proved his was complete, and he annihilated me on 4 out of 5 races. Friday is usually pizza night at our place; thankfully Mom grabbed a huge salad to accompany it. I haven't had much of an appetite lately, so salad is right up my alley tonight; seems like my thoughts have been elsewhere than food. Mom commented on my decreased enthusiasm for pizza, but I just shrugged her off and told her I was full from our school snack. Realistically, I had gorged myself on sushi earlier and was currently thinking about take-out with Quinn, not pizza with my family.

After dinner, Cody retreated to his room but I could hear the headset voices of Halo rumbling through the wall of my bedroom. He was playing with his friends, and I couldn't help but smile; he was popular in his own way, but I think it was mainly because I always caught his friends gawking at me when I bent over to pick something up. That is such an awkward age, I thought. But then again, I felt like I was going through my own personal second puberty with the way Quinn had me nervous and excited all at once. I hopped off the bed and walked over to the full size mirror on the wall.

I am pretty, nothing extraordinary, but years of soccer and running gifted me with lean legs, a flat stomach and nice arms. I have fair skin, high cheek bones, brown eyes and light brown hair that falls below my shoulders, not curly, but wavy, soft. I'm not particularly "girly"- aside from the mandatory skirts for school I only wore dresses to weddings or fancy family events. I am much more comfortable in tight jeans or pants paired with a nice boot, small heel, usually something black and leathery. I always wear a watch; minimal rings, occasional bracelet, or single floating diamond necklace in white gold with matching earrings from my 16th birthday. I have great tits, a little more than a handful- "perfect" I've been told, the memory makes me smile. I've been blessed with a relatively even complexion- I can get away with mascara, occasional eyeliner and lip gloss most days. My make-up regimen is as low maintenance as my casual clothing style.

My family has been consistent, if anything else. Mom works days, weekends, nights, whenever. My father has been working nights for years, so often I only see him on the weekends, and usually only when I have done something wrong- he tends to be heavy handed with the discipline, but his schedule lets us civilly avoid conflict.

Our family wasn't always this complacent; our wars have been stuff of legends. My mother makes excellent money at her job, and my father is a success in his own right. I've never wanted for anything, but I was also instilled with a strong work ethic. I've had a least a part time job since I was fourteen years old. This "volitolding" thing had been taking up more of my time, so I was currently on a short sabbatical from my usual administrative position at the local doctor's office. The doctor that owned that office, Mikal Valestrom, had a daughter about my age and was always eager to show me "interesting" cases in hopes that I would follow in the footsteps she refused to. Chloe was heart set on being a professional artist, painter; particularly oils, and to her credit, she was very, very good.

My plan was to return to my weekend position at the doctor office after school (and volitolding) ended in the next two months. Aside from the money, I missed the autonomy of the work. I was often able to finish early and read or research stuff online. I am fond of the sciences and math has never been a problem, but the physics of movement and activity interest me the most these days.

Speaking of which… I jogged over to my phone to see if any new activity of a physical nature was brimming on there…Facebook, uneventful; Twitter, boring; text history? Why yes, I think I will… I found myself laughing as I scrolled through conversations I'd had with Quinn over the past week. She was damn funny, in addition to being fantastic to look at. Just as I was about to call that lovely blonde and open the flirtation lines, my phone vibrated out of my hands with a jolt.

Once it hit the floor and bounced under the bed I knew I was going to miss the call. By the time I retrieved it from the depths of dust bunnies and discarded shoes I had two missed calls. One was from Katie and the other from Dane; an old hook up flame probably looking to reignite the fire. I couldn't help but frown at the thought that neither rumble was Quinn, but then I realized I was probably obsessing that she was most likely out partying and drinking with people her own age; it was a Friday night after all. Two calls, one voicemail, hmm. Katie's message was loud in the back ground, but the gist of it was that she was at Logan's place having a "so-so" time and looking for a ride back to her house because Logan decided he was going to smoke pot with his buddies and shoot paintballs at cans somewhere. She also warned me Dane was there and equally as drunk as she and everyone else was, and had been asking about me.

I called Katie back and told her I would be by in a bit to rescue her from the filthy apartment. She laughed and told me that she was nauseated and had to go. I chuckled to myself because even a rookie knows that sushi and liquor do not mix. One needs to prepare for intoxication with foods needed to keep from vomiting, and raw fish with a little rice does not cut it. I trotted downstairs, told my mom that Katie and Logan got in a fight and that she needed me to scoop her up. I asked if I can stay at her place in case she wants me to. Mom nodded, understanding the trials and tribulations of teenage dating.

"Make sure you text me to let me know she's ok. Are you working tomorrow?" she said, appraising my face.

"I will Mom. I'm off tomorrow, maybe I will just hang at Katie's place- unless you need me?" it was a hopeful request…hopeful that she didn't need me.

"No, Cody will be gone all day; I have to go in to the office. Have a nice day, check in periodically, and tell Katie's Mom I said Hi." She rubbed my arm and gave me a quick hug. "Be careful baby, okay?" I nodded and hugged her back, I appreciated the space she gave me; I had her trust, and of course now part of me felt guilty for all the recent lying. I grabbed a change of clothes, my cell phone charger, toiletries, and a book that was vaguely keeping my attention.

I called Quinn on the way to rescue Katie. I thought for sure it would go to voicemail and had run a quick, witty message over and over in my head. She picked up on the fourth ring.

"Hey there…" she purred into the phone. I could hear typing in the background.

"Are you home? I thought for sure you would be out living it up, shaking your tail feather…" A soft chuckle followed my blatant flirt.

"Nah, I haven't been very productive at work lately…can't figure out why…so I took some work home. You know, homework." I can hear the smile when she talks, I mirror it myself.

"Hmm, good to know."

"What about you? What are you doing on this fine evening?" Her voice is like honey on the line.

"I'm rescuing a poor, drunk friend from her boyfriend's place and tucking her in for the night. I know, glamorous huh?"

"Aw, I think it's cute, and very responsible of you not to let her drive. But I'm a little jealous you're tucking her in and not me." I'm instantly wet, my heart beats faster, and I am looking in all the mirrors so I don't crash.

"Ha! You and me both lady." I mean every word.

"Weeeeell, why don't you give me a call later if you wrap up early, chances are I'm going to be elbow deep in work still."

"Elbow deep, huh? Sounds, interesting." I'm almost drooling now.

"Hahahaha, you caught that, huh? Just trying a little subliminal coercion. Is it working?" Her words are slow and deliberate, like she wants me to hear Every. Single. Syllable.

"Maybe too well. I almost drove off the road at the thought." It's true, I was really close to hitting a mail box on that last little confession. "All right, enough of this reckless driving influence, let me try to get my friend under control. I will call you in a bit, even if just to say good night, k?"

"I suppose. Catch you later, drive safe."

"Buh-bye, oh and Quinn…"

"Yeah?"

"Next time, I prefer you in no panties, they just got in the way…" I heard her gasp quietly.

"Noted. Talk to you later."

I got to Logan's house a few minutes later; there was plenty of loud music you could hear from the street, empty solo cups littering the driveway and front yard. I carefully made my way around the debris, up the stairs of the front porch. The door was unlocked, so I let myself in. The house smelled of stale beer, sweat, and dirty laundry. Ugh, boys and their filth. My lip curled involuntarily.

"That's a good look for you…" Katie's voice was unmistakable off to my right. She was leaning in the doorway of the downstairs living room, holding a red Solo cup, swirling its contents slowly.

"Ha, what's in the cup there McCarthy, holy water?" My smirk was irrepressible.

"Actually, fucker, it's regular water, I'm in the process of purging my demons," she said with a wink, resting her head on the door frame.

"You okay?" The joking tone faded from my voice; my eyes were appraising her face, hair.

"Yeah, I'm fine. Trouble in paradise, boyfriend is a stoner loser, left me with a bunch of drunk 20-somethings, all horny and without any real self control. Too bad for them I'm not drunk enough or blind enough to lower my standards." A devilish grin flashed across her face.

"Well, m'lady, your chariot awaits, shall I rescue you from the tetanus shot that is just one stubbed toe away in this filth pit?"

"Yeah, absolut-…."

She was interrupted by a tall, dark-haired buffoon stumbling into her, causing her to dump the contents of her water on her shirt. It was Dane, eyes squinting, mouth open in an awkward half smile, holding a bottle of beer that sloshed around onto the floor. He was a giant- 6'4" with broad shoulders. His size even in this state was a formidable sight, he towered over Katie and me.

"What the fuck, Dane? Can you control your drunken groping for one hot second?" Katie shouted as she brushed the droplets off her shirt and skirt. "Fucking slob," she muttered as she shot a death stare in his direction. She walked toward the kitchen to get a towel, telling me she just needed a minute to gather up her overnight bag and purse.

"Rachelllll Berry, fancy meeting you here." He was leaning over me, supporting himself on the door frame, the smell of cheap beer on my face from his proximity.

"Ugh, Dane! Personal space much?" I leaned farther away from him, crossing my arms over my chest while he tottered back and forth on his feet.

"Listen, I called you, why don't we go catch up a bit?" His speech was slurred as he jerked his thumb toward the couch behind him in the living room.

"Charmed, I'm sure, but I'm all set. Why don't you sober up and maybe I'll see you around, or if I'm lucky, I won't." The mocking grin spread across my face like wildfire. Dane wasn't so bad, but the demise of our hookups was directly correlated to his drinking and his inability to refrain from being a complete asshole when he was drunk. I heard a snicker in the background- I hadn't noticed Dane's friend Russ lounging on the chair in the corner.

"Aw Rach, don't be like that, you know you miss this." He reached his gorilla arms out and slapped my ass before dragging me in for a sloppy, tongue-filled kiss.

"You fucker! Get the hell off me." I pushed both my hands against his chest, attempting to shove him off me. His size was more than I could manage.

"Like you were even worth the effort anyway. Too much mouth on you, not enough good use of it." He spit the words at my face, and droplets of beer and bad breath ignited my rage.

"As if you were even big enough for me find." It came out as a bark.

"Bitch!" Dane's rage was palpable as he swung the arm with the beer in my general direction. I ducked easily and shoved him backwards. He lost his balance and fell back, tripping over the coffee table and falling onto the floor. Russ was howling and slapping his knee in amusement. Dane shot an angry glare in his direction and whipped his head back toward me before hurling the half-filled beer at my head.

The glass shattered against the wall inches from my head; beer splashed over my face and shoulder, shards of glass bit against my cheek. The noise alarmed Katie back to the room.

"What the ever-living fuck did you do, Dane?" She was red with fury, sprinting toward Dane, who at this point was just slouched against the couch, moments from passing out.

"Katie! Stop, relax, it's fine, he's a lush with an anger problem." I lunged forward, grabbing her arm before she could kick him in the nuts, spinning her around. "Let's go."

"You all right? I think you're bleeding…" Katie's voice was softer, but the anger was still audible. She reached up and gently wiped the beer from my face, grazing over a few small cuts on my left cheek bone. I winced. I could feel her picking little pieces of glass from my hair and off my shirt. I closed my eyes instinctively; the prospect of shards in my cornea frightens me.

"I'm fine, let me just splash some water on my face, and we'll hit the road. Keep an eye on Clemens over there, I give you permission to stomp his gonads if he moves." I winked in Katie's direction and wandered to the first floor bathroom to assess the damage.

It wasn't so bad: three small cuts along my left cheek bone, a little bit of dried blood; nothing a wet face cloth couldn't fix. Of course, the prospect of using any linen from this house gave me visions of bacterial meningitis so I splashed my face with water and picked the remaining glass from my hair, drying my face with toilet paper from a new roll I unwrapped from under the sink. I figured it was the safest, most sterile thing in this house, and then shuddered at the thought.

Katie met me in the hall. She was holding a bowl of warm water and had a wicked grin on her face.

"What are you up to? No good by the looks of it." My eyebrow arched as I examined her closely for details of her activities.

"Oh, nothing. I just figured since Dane passed out I would help him expel those horrible toxins by encouraging bladder use…i.e. I put his hand in warm water and let him wet himself. Then I posted a picture on Facebook with a tag reading "Dane, Dane, gone insane, couldn't wait to pee a'gain…" She laughed, winked and deposited the bowl on the floor as we walked out.

I couldn't help but laugh at the sight of a 6'4" machismo sprawled on the floor with a large wet stain stretching down his leg. Serves you right to drink too much to control your bodily functions, fucker.

We walked out to the car and she filled me in on all the juicy details of the night: beer pong, tequila shots, bad house music, Logan being a dick and leaving her with Dane and his crew, oh, and something called "jungle juice" that was green but surprisingly sweet and tasty. We pulled into the local fast food joint and picked up a burger, chicken nugget twenty piece with all the dipping sauces and an extra large Diet Coke. Katie was going to need all the fatty carbs she could get to keep the hangover from roaring its ugly head tomorrow.

"So, Cinderella, where to? My place? Yours? Or do we take this circus on the road and go somewhere fun?" I glance over at my partner, chowing down her feast, laughing to myself over the music in the background.

"Well, umm," she clears her throat, swallows a big gulp of Diet Coke, she looks at me with a glimmer of mischief before saying, "I was hoping you might drop me off at Ruari's place, it's not far from here."

"Oh," I'm a little surprised, but obviously I will take her wherever she wants.

"Well, I was sort of hoping that maybe, you might want to use me as an excuse to stay out all night and call that cute blonde you are seducing…" A sideways smirk sneaks across her face as she drops the bomb.

"Uh? What?! Is that why you called me? To promote a booty call?" I gaped in surprised and in awe of her conniving ways…impressed, yes, that sneaky beast!

"Well, I probably shouldn't drive, although that Dane situation did sober me up… But yeah, I was sort of hoping you might go get some, I mean, I am dying to know what happens next…" She giggled and popped a chicken nugget in her mouth.

"Ha! Well did you actually get into a fight with Logan, or was that part of your elaborate scheme? Faking a fight to get me over here?" I stared at her incredulously while waiting at the stop light a few blocks from Ruari's place, a trip we had made dozens of times over the years. She was the youngest of the older sisters, lived with a roommate and had an in-ground pool. Plus, it was only a little after 10pm so she was definitely still up, probably getting ready to go out.

"Yeah, a fake fight would have been epic, unfortunately he _was_ actually a dick. Logan is cut off from sex until he makes it up to me." She nods her head in confirmation of her threat.

I drop Katie off at her sister's but waited in the driveway until Ruari ushers her inside. I checked, double checked and triple checked that Katie didn't want to hang with me the rest of the night, but she just kept telling me to "Stop being your own poon-block" and to "Grow a set and get some lady-lovin'." I hugged her before she hopped out; she wished me good luck and told me to call in "the morning with details… or the afternoon, whenever you are available, wink, wink."

I punched Quinn's address into the GPS, surfed through my iPod at the intersection to find my most motivating, pumped-up play list and called Quinn to make sure she was still up. She answered on the second ring; I couldn't help but giggle a little.

"What's so funny?" I could hear the smile in her voice.

"Nothing, just glad you were still up, that's all…So, what are you doing at this moment? You know, besides waiting by the phone." I laughed loud enough for her to know I was teasing, smiling to myself as I flicked my blinker on.

"Hmm, well, I'm just checking some emails at this very second, and just so you know, the phone is charging beside me…it was in arm's reach." Her voice is light and flirty.

"Uh huh, sure…So, um, interested in a little company? I happen to be free tonight, if you aren't too tired from all that work you've been doing." I licked my lips subconsciously as I said this; when I realized it, I felt myself blush and I was glad she was on the phone, unable to see me.

"Well, I suppose I could rally for a bit… although I will warn you my fingers are pretty tired from all that typing…" Her voice trailed off and dead silence was on the other line.

I gulped so audibly that she laughed, startling me, because I was sure she had hung up. "Um, ok, well, we will have to make do I guess…I'll be there in twenty minutes. Need anything?"

"Just you. Drive safe, I'll leave the door unlocked. See you in a bit." _Click_.

I parked in the usual spot, and leisurely walked up to the door, intentionally moving slowly to give myself a minute or two to calm my nerves and to appreciate again Quinn's beautiful garden and fountain. I sat on one of the stone benches facing the fountain, and watched the water trickle down the statue and into the basin. Some change had been thrown in there, I assume for luck. It made me happy to think of the magic that comes with such actions- the belief that Fate will smile on you and grant you a wish, good luck, fortune if you give her something of value.

I reached into my purse and dug out a shiny quarter. I whispered a secret into the metal, flipped it over in my hand before I lightly kissed my closed fist, and tossed it into the fountain. I watched it fall to the bottom, joining the other dreams and wishes, smiling broadly to myself as warmth spread through my chest. I glanced over at Quinn's door and stood, tossing one last glance over my shoulder at the fountain before I knocked and opened her door.

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**This sounds like trouble, no? ;)**


	9. Chapter 8

**A/N: Hey Guys! So, here's the update you've been waiting for- I will try to update weekly from this point on if I can. I know that you haven't had a lot of development into the lives of Rachel and Quinn...that's intentional. I will start to braid in more of their individual details as the story goes on. It's supposed to be in media res with you stumbling into Rachel's distracted existence. As she grows more sure of her self, more details about their lives with flush out. It's the idea of seeing a detail before you notice the big picture. I hope that makes sense. Anywayyyyys- this may not be a "read in public" kinda chapter, ;) **

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**Chapter Eight: A Warm Welcome**

"Quinn?" I called into the house as I let myself in. Out of habit, I knocked before opening the door, I guess I would feel like I was intruding if I didn't announce my arrival. Knocking seemed…polite.

I kicked off my shoes and dropped my purse by the door before turning and locking it behind me. I stepped in front of the mirror and assessed the hair and make-up situation. I had taken time to change the beer-stained shirt and reapply perfume, eyeliner and lip gloss. My lips were a glossy deep pink; I had to admit they looked positively delicious in this mirror.

An arm slid around my waist, catching my breath momentarily. I hadn't noticed Quinn approach because I was fussing with myself in the glass.

"Hey there," she purred into my neck just below my ear as she pulled me into a tight embrace, pushing her breasts against my back, hips against my ass. "Nice lips."

My knees felt weak at the sound of her honey-coated voice just millimeters from my ear, but the look in her eyes as she watched me in the mirror is what elicited a low moan. She looked positively predatory; hungry, turned on, and excited all at once. I leaned my head back into her, turning my neck to the side, exposing my flesh by her mouth, begging for her to touch my now-burning skin. Her eyes flashed darkly, making her green irises glitter in the mirror. She lowered her lips to my neck, keeping her eyes locked on my reflection, gently licking and sucking my skin. It took all of my power not to close my eyes, when all I wanted to do was shut off all of my senses to focus just on this feeling. My right hand laced fingers with hers over my abdomen, the left reaching behind me, running my fingers through her hair, encouraging her mouth. She hummed against the skin before nipping my ear lobe, pulling it into her mouth and gently sucking on it; she let it out with a low "pop" sound. I shuddered.

"I think all greetings should begin this way…" It came out muttered, hungry sounding.

"Mmhmm." She had resumed kissing my neck, slowly approaching my shoulder.

I released my fingers from hers, ghosted over my abdomen and reached behind me. Although she was a little taller I was still able to get a firm grip on her ass; I started to knead it, gently at first, but increasing the force as she continued to lap at my neck. Quinn moaned into the soft flesh behind my ear, and a wicked grin spread across my face as she closed her eyes, feeling the sensation in its entirety.

I had won the staring contest, I wanted my prize. I took Quinn's distraction as an opportunity and spun quickly, pushing her against the wall behind us, pressing our bodies together. I felt my pupils dilate at the sight of her caught off guard, pinned to the wall. My hands slid down her body and clasped her hands, dragging them up the wall and holding them over her head. She was biting her lip, eyes dark with desire. She brought her head forward to kiss me, but I pulled back. She hissed what sounded like a curse and gently pulled against my hands to express her dissatisfaction. I winked at her and brought my mouth to the inside of her right elbow, kissing slowly up the soft flesh of her arm. She closed her eyes and put her head against the wall, gently rolling her body against mine. I kicked my foot between hers, pushing her legs apart with my knee. Her breathing halted, only to continue with increased pace, shallow breaths, as I pushed my thigh against the crotch of her jeans. I brought one hand down from over her head, securing her arms with my left hand, allowing the right to trail down her cheek, over her collarbone. I palmed a firm, perky breast, plucking the erect nipple through the thin fabric of her fitted tee. Quinn gasped, eyes popping open, looking at me intently. My mouth abandoned the soft flesh of her inner arm as I pulled up her shirt with my right hand, fingers grazing heaving ribs before pulling the cup of her bra down, exposing her left breast. Her eyes were as big as saucers as I lowered my mouth to a dusty pink nipple, keeping eye contact with her. I teased the nipple with my tongue, dancing over the swollen bud before gently biting the flesh. She arched her back and ground her hips down against my thigh, searching for more friction. I took advantage of her new position and slid my right hand behind her back, cupping her ass, guiding her pelvic movements against my leg. I could feel the heat and wetness on the thigh of my pants, the same reaction mirrored between my own legs. "Rachel…" it came out as a whisper.

I released the now-red, swollen nipple with a wet popping noise. "Uh huh?" I spoke against her skin as I resumed kissing the soft flesh above her nipple, tracing my tongue toward the space between her perfect breasts.

"My God, fuck." She had given up at making sentences, her eyes pleading as she tried to pull her hands down from above her head; but my position had her trapped: legs apart, back against the wall, hands pinned and my firm grasp guiding her sex into my thigh. I released her ass and switched hands holding her captive, allowing my left hand to glide down her body, pulling the rest of her tight tee above her chest. I unhooked the front clasp of her bra, releasing her chest, and immediately noticed the small mark I left last time. A small smile spread across my face.

"This needs close observation," I whispered into the skin as I kissed around the mark, slowly taking her nipple between my fingers, rolling it gently. She licked her lips before biting the bottom one, eyes boring down at the actions of my fingers on her nipple; she began to whimper but continued her gentle undulations against my thigh. "Hey now, don't bruise that lip, it's my favorite." My eyes momentarily widened as I watched her release a now plump, red lip purposely pouting it forward toward me. I couldn't resist the urge to kiss her anymore; I raised my mouth from the mark on her chest gently nipping at her chin before gliding my tongue against her pouting lip.

"Mmm, please." she spoke against my lips before opening hers slightly. She pulled her head forward abruptly, smashing her lips into mine, hungry tongue searching my mouth, dancing between our lips. She tasted perfect, like desire, like I couldn't get enough. I let my hand glide up from her breast, grasping behind her head, deepening our kiss. She was grinding hard against my thigh, the friction making the skin of my leg feel like it was on fire. I was soaking wet; forget my pants leg, I was drenched and momentarily distracted by the wetness and the kissing and the grinding. She pulled her hands loose from above her head, shrugging my hand off easily. I gripped behind her head tighter, my free hand now frantically pulling at the button on her jeans, desperately pawing at her stomach. Her newly-released hands flooded my skin, scratched at my back, clawed at the back of my neck, and cupped my ass, pulling my thigh harder against her core. Her chest was heaving when I finally got access to her pants, slipping my hand palm flat against her tensed stomach, cupping her glistening center. No panties. I smiled against her mouth.

"Umph," she groaned against my mouth, kissing me deeply, less coordinated now, biting at my lower lip. I pulled my thigh back and felt the wetness soak the back of my hand, fingers immersed in her arousal, palm cupping her lower lips.

"You are so wet." The words sounded muffled against her lips, but the surprise and excitement in my words was clear. She pulled her head back, looking me in the eyes, deep hooded emerald eyes flashing, and she nodded slightly, chewing at her bottom lip in embarrassment. "God you are so HOT," I breathed out before kissing her mouth once more, running my hand up her sex until I felt her swollen clit with my first two fingers. She jolted off the wall, pressing into my hand, back arching, breaking our kiss.

Quinn was panting now, gasping for air. I released the hold on her neck, scooping my arm around her back, easing her back against the wall for leverage and pulling her close at the same time. One hand continued to grasp at my shoulder while her other hand slid down my arm. She gripped my fingers and guided them down from her clit, a little lower. I was staring at her, eyes wide as I realized what she wanted. Her head was resting on the wall, arched up slightly, eyes pleading; she only nodded subtly before closing her eyes. I wasn't quite sure what to do; I let her hand guide me. She pressed one of my fingers against the hot, wet opening, encouraging it in with rolling hips. The finger was taken in easily, pulled in by tight muscles. She was clawing at my hand, as I began to gently thrust in and out.

"Two…"she begged, eyes squeezed shut, head still tilted back. I slid a second finger in quickly; she was so wet it was seamless. I increased the pace and depth of my thrusts the best I could from this angle; both her hands grasped my face now, pulling me into a hungry, wild kiss as she pressed her core down on my fingers, into my open palm, forcing the heel of my hand against her clit. "Fuck!" she practically screamed against my lips as I felt her insides tighten around my fingers, making it harder and harder to thrust. I felt the muscles in her stomach ripple against my forearm as her orgasm began to build. She pulled her lips from mine, breaking the kiss before pressing her forehead into my neck, gasping for breath. Her breathing halted suddenly as I felt her orgasm rip through her, stilling my fingers and causing her to go limp against my shoulder, leaving her full body weight against me.

I gently kissed her sweat-glistening neck up to her jaw as she panted and gasped for air. Her arms slid down from my neck, around my shoulders, pulling me close into a hug. Well, a hug with my fingers still inside her. The thought made me laugh nervously and I kissed her mouth quickly before pulling my head back, locking my eyes on hers and slowly withdrawing my hand. Her eyes bulged momentarily, mouth forming a small "o" followed by a low whimper. I wrapped my arms around her waist, pulling her into a tight hug as I felt her body still shaking and coming down. She kissed my neck, nuzzled into my shoulder, and giggled as she lightly bit at the sweat-soaked fabric by her mouth.

I couldn't help but let out a low hiss as her nibble on my neck shot lightning over my soaked and sensitive sex. I squeezed my eyes shut, feeling her body against mine, my heart still thumping out of my chest. Just the closeness of her, the smell of her perfume and sweat were bringing me to the brink of release. I kissed her lazily, allowing my hands to gently knead the skin of her back, trying to slow my own racing heartbeat. She leaned back, eyes still cloudy, and pulled off her shirt before discarding her bra. My eyes devoured her naked torso; I could feel my pulse begin to race again, my hands reaching to touch her skin. Unfazed by my leering, her hands snaked around my waist, grabbing the hem of my shirt and tugging it over my head. The heat of her naked torso flush against my body made my knees weak and I stumbled back. She kissed me once more before grabbing my hand and guiding me out of the foyer into the living room.

I hadn't noticed until this moment that the fireplace was lit, and that she had moved the table off the soft brown and tan rug, leaving the space in front of the glowing fire open. She turned towards me, smiling shyly as she tugged me to the carpet with her. As soon as I was flat on my back she was over me, pressing my shoulders into the floor before sliding her arms under my back to remove me white lace bra. Every time her fingers grazed my skin I felt my center clench more tightly, like I was being wound up like a top. I was desperate for her to touch me; the foreplay had gone on long enough, if she didn't touch me soon I would die.

Almost as if she could read my mind, Quinn walked her hand down the valley between my breasts, making circles over my navel before plunging lower. It was like it happened in slow motion: her mouth pressed firmly against mine as her fingers danced over the button of my jeans, popping it open effortlessly. She tentatively pressed her fingertips below the line of my panties, to soft wanting flesh. I felt a surge of heat tear through me as she gently circled over the swollen nub at the top of my center. My hips bucked involuntarily, begging for more contact. My mouth opened against her plump, swollen lips, pleading to be consumed by her. "Please…" it came out as a whisper. She smiled at my need, kissing more deeply, letting her tongue answer my request. She pressed her fingers more forcefully against my clit, making slow, lazy circles. I tried to spread my legs to give her better access, but was confined by my jeans. I was about to burst when she pulled her mouth away from mine, and shimmied down my body before latching onto a bright, pink nipple. That did it, the moment she wrapped her tongue around the bud my growing crescendo came to its full height and crashed down with a fireworks display. I arched my back off the carpet, hands grasping at her head, pulling her hair. A deep, throaty moan escaped my lips as all the air rushed out of my lungs, chasing the lightning through my limbs. I felt my eyes roll up into my head as she released my nipple, gliding her hands along my sides; each touch elicited shudders and vibrations like waves in an ocean storm. I was panting, my hand running over my face, brushing sweat from my brow, trying to breathe. I'm not sure how long it took, felt like ages, to catch my breath, slow my heart. Even as it returned to an even pace the beats felt so deep and large, like they had never been before.

"_Woah_." It was articulate as I could be; I think I just saw Jesus…

"Yeah, you are something special …" she was laying on my naked chest, speaking into my skin.

"Huh? Me? I don't know about that. I mean, that was the best orgasm I have ever had, so I guess that means you are something special," I winked at her before kissing her head lightly.

"Well let's just agree that we pair well together. Special in our own ways, agreed?" She ran her hand gently through my scalp, pushing aside sweat matted hair.

I nod, wrapping my arms around her shoulders before adding, "Best greeting ever…"

Quinn brushed the hair off my face, and paused, movements stopped, "Rachel?"

"Mmhmm?" Her fingers danced at my cheek, she grazed my cuts. I winced.

"What happened to your face?" her forehead is furrowed, eyes squinting slightly as she evaluates the damage.

"Oh, it's nothing. Long story, involving a drunk ogre, a close call, and spilled beer..." I try to make it sound as nonchalant as possible. In fact, I had forgotten about it until this moment.

"Did it hurt?" her eyes seem sad, but curious at the same time.

"No. It was startling, that's for sure, but I have cat-like reflexes, so its cool." Her fingers traced down my cheek, sliding under my jaw before gently hooking under my chin, pulling me up for a soft, sweet kiss. I held the kiss. When her lips touched mine, everything else left my mind, time stopped, I must have held my breath because only a gasp separated us. My breath was short and shallow before I brought my lips back to her, propping myself up on my elbows to meet her mouth, eager to resume our prior position. She lowered her body down to mine, hot flesh pressing against me. A shiver ran through me – from the contact, not the temperature – every inch of her makes my body purr.

"Are you cold?" Quinn whispered against my lips, breathing against me like a ghost.

"No, never…it's your skin..." The truth spilled from my lips involuntarily; I was embarrassed, but the enthusiasm of the kiss that followed shook my insecurity. She pressed hard against me, tongue searching against my lips for entrance; I teasingly nipped and pulled back, just out of her reach. A hungry growl escaped her smile, and my laughter allowed her access to my mouth- ravenous tongue chasing mine. _God, she just muddles my brain_. My hands gripped at her waist, sliding up her naked flesh and over heaving ribs to grasp her shoulders, pull her face closer to mine. My legs voluntarily wrapped around her waist. I could feel the tension winding up in my abdomen as our playful kissing became more intense. I slid my hands up her sides, grasping behind her shoulders, gently scratching at the skin.

Quinn exhaled a purr against the side of my mouth as I felt her press her hips firmly against mine. She raked her fingers through my messy hair, dragging her nails down my scalp to the base of my neck, gripping tightly to pull us closer. I could feel every movement of her mouth on mine, the urgency that followed a searing heat of pressure as her lips crashed against mine. I sucked her top lip into my mouth, gently grazing it with teeth and tongue, teasing a low moan from her as I mirrored my aggression with nails more firmly pressing into her back. Quinn broke the kiss with a wet "pop," pulling her head back to look me directly in the eye, dark clouded green eyes searching my face.

"When, when do you have to go...?" She whispered the words, but her gaze was loud and direct, tracing from my eyes to my lips, down to my neck and back up.

A devilish smirk crawled across my mouth, "I don't." She had held her breath waiting for the answer, and now she blinked, confused, a perfectly shaped eyebrow arching slightly. "I'm yours, for the night...if you want." The last bit came out a little less confident and almost as a question. Her eyes widened momentarily, I saw her suppress the reaction as fast as she could.

"Hmm," she was all gravel and seduction, "I want that, I want you. All night." I felt the heat burn into my face and the tips of my ears as her lips met mine again. Something about announcing/confirming/accepting that I would be staying the night reignited the fire in the Quinn that met me at the door.

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:) Whattaya think? Leave me a review if you are feeling generous. :)


	10. Chapter 9

**A/N: Sorry, peeps, I've been insane with work/life lately. I know this took a longer time than the other chapters to post, and I apologize. The good news, Ladies and Gents (?do I have gents in the audience?- if yes, welcome!), is that I wrote a bunch of shiz I can post in quick-ish succession. :) Anywho...enjoy :) Things pick up pretty quickly form this point on. Take that however you'd like. ;)**

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**Chapter Nine: So Fresh and So Clean, Clean**

At some point during the very early morning hours we finally wandered sleepily into the bedroom, hand in hand. Quinn nuzzled up against me, kissing my neck as she walked – no, as I dragged her – toward the bedroom. When we crawled into bed it was still dark; the bed was perfect, warm, comfortable, heaven. I don't remember much after that.

I woke up first. Initially, I wasn't sure where I was- blinking sleepily at the lights coming through the window and thinking it was brighter than my room usually is. I looked around the room to familiarize myself with my surroundings and realized the light was coming from the large bay window of her bedroom; the shades were not drawn. I could tell by the lightness of the sky that it was early, not quite sunrise, but that night had begun to recede. _Oof_. As comfortable as the carpet was in the living room, my back sure was sore.

I could make out the silhouette of Quinn's shoulder in the growing brightness of the room, but I was even more aware of her breath against my collarbone. I found myself looking down, watching; tracing my fingertips from her wrists to her elbow gently draped across me. I was laying flat on my back and she was curled into my side, her head on my shoulder, breath ghosting across my chest. Instinctively I wanted to pull her closer to me, against my side, but I was also enjoying the quiet tranquility of this moment. It just seemed right- like my mind isn't racing or my chest isn't full of sneaking anxiety… I felt very comfortable, at peace, happy.

I stayed like that for a while watching Quinn's eyelids fluttering gently while she dreamed. Listening to the cadence of her heart pressed against my chest, everything felt peaceful. I wondered if this was the "paradise moment" I'd hear about so often in Philosophy. The moment when everything is as it should be, complete in its simplicity.

As Quinn woke up, I felt her nuzzle closer into my neck as Igently traced my fingers up her arm to her elbow, scratching the skin very lightly, coaxing her awake. She hummed against my neck, the vibrations gave me butterflies. It was so nice to feel her so close to me, to feel that sensation of warmth. I gently leaned forward and kissed her forehead, taking my free hand to brush the bangs off her face, giving me clear view of her beautiful, emerald green eyes. She opened them slowly at first, just like any other morning of any other day but I'd never been there before for that blessed event. I just spent the night, a full night, with probably the most beautiful girl I've ever seen; I let that sink in. All I could think about was how she still so damn stunning, in the morning with no make-up after a night of sex, still looking gorgeous. I am so, so, so, happy to be in this moment.

After the kiss she blinks awake, hand gently scratching my stomach as she stretches against me. "Hey," she purred against my neck, nuzzling deeper, leaving soft, wet kisses along my skin.

"Hey, yourself." I smiled down and nudged her with my nose.

"Good morning, have you been awake long?" Her voice was sleepy, a little hoarse from sleep, but still so wonderfully honey-filled to my ears.

"No, just watching you. I know that sounds creepy, but I have to tell you, you are a really cute sleeper." I couldn't help but smirk; I meant every word of it.

"That is a little creepy…but I'll allow it. Only because you are the softest person I've ever slept on." Even this early in the morning the flirtation was palpable her voice.

"Well, creepy as it may be… I am very happy to wake up next to you, er, under you. I had a lot of fun last night. Thanks." My voice was soft, and I shyly turned away as I felt the color creep up my neck into my face.

"I have to admit, last night I was convinced you were leaving," she said, looking down, a gentle sadness in her voice. I don't know what it was but just hearing those simple words surprised me, made me feel wanted. It was exciting, and yet I didn't know what to do with that knowledge. Besides, of course, absolutely, totally, devour her face. She smiled as I pecked her face repeatedly, before gently kissing the skin of my collarbone again and giggling into my shoulder.

"Well, I hope you weren't disappointed I stayed. Because I vaguely remember the romance lighting and round two on the carpet, being just as fun if not more than round one, which, may I remind you began standing in the hallway..." My smile was smug but I wasn't ashamed; the memory was fucking hot.

"You know, for someone new at this, you have a lot of determination. I mean you didn't even show any hesitation whatsoever, that's interesting..." She's flirting, teasingly dragging her fingers against my stomach. I find it completely distracting. I should be teasingly challenging her, accusing her of being rude and wrong, saying 'absolutely not,' or quipping that I'm just that talented by nature. Instead I am distracted. Her skin on my skin again wiped the slate clean. My brain is mush.

"Well, I did have an excellent teacher. I'm a dedicated student, if I do say so myself." I smiled down and followed my response with a gentle kiss to her brow once more. She turned her head up towards me bringing her lips to meet mine.

"I have to admit, this may be my favorite subject. And you may be my favorite student." She breathes the words against my lips closing the distance between us with a strong kiss.

We lay like this for some time, enjoying each other's company in silence as the morning began to shine through the windows. Every once in a while we broke the silence with a gentle stroking of the skin, or delicately placed kiss. I must've dozed off at some point, as I remember waking to Quinn moving off the bed and walking across the room. I groaned, squinting my eyes to watch her leave. Upon hearing my disapproval she turns and smiled from the doorway, lightly touching the doorframe, pressing her face against it while looking back at me.

"Just starting the coffee, seems like I may need it today." She smiles, uttering the words slowly.

"I take it black, with a touch of sugar. Just a touch," I wink, lying on my back watching her walk away from me. I stretch out on the bed, doing my best imitation of a starfish, gently cracking my neck and rolling the sleep out of my shoulders, wrists, and ankles. I find myself momentarily embarrassed when I realize the sheet is poorly hiding my nudity, and quickly snatch the tangled linen from the bottom of the bed to cover myself. It's instinctual for me to hide- I furrow my brow at the absurdity of this reaction. She has seen me naked, _touched_ me naked, _kissed_ me naked, you'd think I would be more comfortable naked in her presence.

About ten minutes later she resumes her post in the bed, holding two cups of coffee: one with milk and sugar, the other black with that "touch " of sugar.

"I'm surprised; very few people take their coffee black." She winks at me, gently brushing her hair behind her ear, fingers lingering at her ear lobe.

"Well, I'm not a morning person usually; the only way I can wake up is with coffee." I take the cup from her hand gingerly holding it in my own. My other hand gently strokes her arm as she lies in the bed next to me. I still cannot believe that this is my morning.

"Hmmm," she purrs gently into my ear as she leans down to lightly kiss below my jaw. She gently nips and sucks the skin underneath my ear over my pulse point. I close my eyes focusing on the feeling of her warm lips on my neck, and find myself turning my head to the side increasing the landscape of my neck for her. She's attentive. She hums and vibrates against my neck, I feel my arousal growing. I'm surprised; she keeps surprising me. My right hand leaves my coffee cup, tracing up her body as she lies next to me, and my left hand gently cups her face as I lean in to kiss her lips and sigh against her mouth. She abandons her own coffee cup on the bedside table, fingers gently tracing up my side, grabbing my shoulder, pulling me close.

"Hey…" I mouth the words against her lips.

"Mmhmm?" She ghosts across my lips.

"How about we shower, start fresh, you and me, a new day?" The sultriness of my voice surprises me.

Quinn grabs my hand, completely forgetting about her coffee. We leave the bed giggling as she walks me into the bathroom, fingers interlaced with my own. Maybe walk is the wrong word, maybe we're jogging I can't tell, because all I can think of is her body and my body in hot water and how excited I am to be with her today. She drags me to the bathroom over the threshold, laughing as she opens the clear, glass doors to the shower.

The heated floor tiles are walk-in perfect, walls lined with most intricate textured tiles housing not one, but two shower heads like a welcoming paradise that I cannot wait to step into. Quinn steps in first and leans her naked body against mine as she gently kisses my jaw. The heat that she brings to my skin makes my heart flutter. She smiles while turning on the showerheads, her skin illuminated by the stream of lights shining through the large stained glass portal window, casting her in beautiful blues, greens, and reds. It's kind of unbelievable, how gorgeous it is in the shower.

Quinn laughs once more, and pulls at my hands until our fingers are interlaced before she drags me into the shower. I watch as her hair turns a damp, dark silky blond pressed against her face and shoulders, over her perfect breasts. I laugh and feel myself biting my lip, surprised because all I want is to be there with her and a part of me is also a little anxious. I let her pull me in. She's so gentle her own touch feels almost nervous.

She grabs the loofah and puts some soap on it before she gently rubs my arm up to my back, turning my body around so that the water is hitting my face, neck and chest. I am happy to be there under the warm water. The loofah scrubs my back up to my neck, down to my low back, under my buttocks. I can't help but feel self conscious; I giggle and lean forward with embarrassment before grabbing the puff from her hands, gently rubbing my chest over my abdomen and down my legs.

I hear Quinn open a bottle and smell vanilla, lavender, maybe coconut? I hear her rub her hands together before she puts her hands atop my head and massages shampoo into my scalp. It's such an intimate thing to be bathed by someone else, like nothing I have ever experienced. It seems so intense, I feel vulnerable but at the same time incredibly happy. The emotions surprise me as her fingers gently scratch my scalp, kneading the shampoo into my hair. I finished with the loofah and turn into the water to wash my hair. At that point I can't help myself, and my fingers dance along her jaw as soapy water runs down her chest. My lips make contact with her lips; her warm, soft, slow lips are waiting for me, her eyes are closed. I can feel every movement of her mouth, tentative at first as she kisses me back, gently tracing her fingers lightly up my ribs, and as she increases her force I feel her tongue against my lips gently sucking my lower lip into her mouth. Instinctively my hands go to her waist and pull her hips to me.

Suddenly the idea of showering becomes completely unnecessary because all I can think, feel, hear is the sound of Quinn's body near mine and the rushing sound in my ears of arousal. I retake the loofah into my hand gently rub up and down her front, her sides, and her back. She purrs into my mouth as my fingertips dance over her skin, massaging the soap into a good lather before the water washes away my progress. We tango like this, hands running over ribs, gently scratching into scalps, tongues engaging in a private dance exchanging the lead with ease for what seems like forever. Eventually my hands drop the loofah and run up her stomach, gently cupping her breasts as my thumbs run over her nipples; first the right, then left. Her back arches, her head tilts back, the waters flushing her front as my mouth goes to her collarbone, gently licking and sucking. I trace my tongue down her sternum in between her perfect breasts to above her navel. She gasps and grabs my face, pulling me back to her mouth; her kisses at first are soft, then more aggressive.

The whole point of the shower is completely lost on both of us at this point. She's kissing me; I don't even realize I'm holding my breath. I gasp and pull away from her. She opens her eyes, looks at me heavy, hooded lids staring at me, staring through me. Everything about her body, face, the way she looks at me makes my heart thud uncontrollably against my ribs. My fingers wrap around her sides, pulling her closer until she is flush against me, the warm water pouring down my back. Her kisses are becoming more urgent; her tongue and my tongue duel for space in our mouths, she sucks my bottom lip gently grazing teeth against it. All I know is that I can feel everything that she's doing. All I can think about is what I want to do to her.

My back to the shower water, I feel the hot stream rinsing my hair, washing out the shampoo. Quinn's back is inches from the shower wall. She's defenseless, I smirk; she's trapped. I kiss her with force, pushing my hand on her hip and left hand on her shoulder until her back is against the shower wall. Her eyes pop open and she gasps lightly as she hits the cold wall with a shiver. I'm under the hot water, but she is completely exposed to the cold air. I lean in, kissing her mouth, licking her jaw, nipping gently at her neck before biting right below her pulse point. She hisses as I clamp down, her hands scratching at my back pulling at my shoulders. I press my body against her to help warm her up; I can't help myself. She's positively gorgeous. I gently suck and nip at her collarbone, dragging my mouth down to her right breast. Her fingers run up through my hair, scratching and clawing at my scalp. Every inch of me is on fire for her. I lower my mouth to her right nipple gently licking, and sucking, teasing with my teeth. Her back arched from the wall, her hands are running down my neck now, grabbing my shoulders, desperate for contact.

My right hand slips down her abdomen, gently cupping her mound as I nip and suck her chest. She drops her head forward, bringing her lips to my ear. She is panting, pleadingly whispering into my ear, "Please, Rach…" I smile against her flesh and allow my fingers to dance across her opening before slowly sliding up and down her warm slit, my fingers gently grazing over the swollen nub as she writhes against the wall, pushing her body against mine. There is such power with this contact; I feel invincible. I decide this is my chance to try something different. I want to taste every part of her, even though the idea makes me very anxious. Just when I think my fear will get the best of me, I find myself begin to kiss slowly down her stomach, fingers still palming her right breast, my other hand gently toying with her clit. Quinn's undulating against my fingers and I feel her hips pushing gently against my mouth as I kiss her lower abdomen.

I hear a gasp as I kiss just above the apex of her hip. Her hands frantically begin to scratch at my hair, her eyes closed, her head arched back against the wall. She's whimpering softly as I kiss and suck her skin. I am careful to move slowly, to taste everything, perfect flesh, warm, delicate skin. Slow is okay, I can do slow; it's not too overwhelming if it's slow. Quinn rakes her fingers through my hair as I move even lower. I gently kiss above her opening one, two, three times. I lower my chin and I gently put my lips to her lips and suck until she pushes her hips off the wall into my face. I gasp because this is not like anything I've ever experienced; my tongue has a mind of its own as it begins to slowly explore her lips. I feel my heart start to race. This is too overwhelming…but it feels right, why am I so nervous? Does this feel good for her? All I know is that every bit of me that isn't freaking out wants to be right where I am.

I kneel down in front of Quinn, nudging her legs apart as my hands go to her hips, gently wrapping around her back, squeezing her buttocks, pulling her close to my face. Her fingers are clawing at my head, pushing me into her. I kiss and suck her clit and am rewarded by a sharp whimper. I decide to delve lower and gently drag my tongue up and down her slit. She cries out, a low moan that is Just. So. Guttural. Both of her hands are in my hair, scratching and pulling, pushing and begging; everything she wants I can feel her fingertips asking for, making me continue.

Tenderly I flatten my tongue and lick up and down her warm, wet folds as the water beats down on the back of my head with a perfect cadence, the repetitive rhythm lulling me into a very relaxed, trance like state. She breaks my daze as she cries out when I lightly poke her opening with my tongue. I take that as an indication that this is a spot that makes her happy; a realization that makes me smirk against her. I move my hand from her hip and gently rub her clit with two fingers. I let my tongue dance around her opening before pressing in just slightly. Her right hand continues to grip my head, gently squeezing and scratching at my scalp. Her left hand is running to her own hair and pulling while she clenches her eyes closed, face toward the ceiling. I extend my tongue, slipping into her opening, tasting every bit of her. She gasps, arches off the wall and jolts into my mouth. I feel her quiver; every part of her begins to stutter and shiver. "Don't, stop." She mutters almost silently into the water stream. With renewed confidence from this encouragement, I begin to thrust in and out as deep as I can go. She is so wet and warm; I love the way she feels against my mouth, I can't get enough of her. My fear has taken a backseat to my lust; my reactions to her body language and utterances are carnal in nature. Her insides are tightening around my tongue, making thrusts more and more difficult. I look up in time to see her begin to slip down the wall, quickly pressing her hips to the wall as I feel her body and legs begin to quiver. I'm holding her by the waist desperate to keep her up. She grips my hair, pulling it forcibly while sliding her other hand down to palm her own perky breast before she starts rolling and pinching her nipple.

I can't help but smile and moan as I look up at her before I subtly curl up into her and I feel her gently start to cant her hips against my face. I hum my pleasure into her as I lick and suck with increased enthusiasm. My head feels dizzy when I feel her muscles start to clench around me and her body start to tremble. Her fingers scratch at my scalp, almost to the point of pain, as she starts to reach her climax. She lets out a low, sultry, desperate moan. I all but melt into her as my fingers resume their position on her clit with an urgent pace as I lick and suck deep inside her. She doesn't last long after that, shuddering violently as her back leaves the wall, arching forward as she slaps one hand behind her to steady herself. Her other hand leaves my hair to claw at her taut abdomen under heaving breasts as she begins to unwind, eyes clenched shut, head tilted back. All of a sudden, she breaks. I feel every muscle in her body contract, release, and shutter accompanied by a high-pitched cry. I can't help but grin into her as I lick and suck gently until she pushes my face away, panting.

I place wet kisses up Quinn's abdomen, running my hands up her sides gently, as I glide up between her breasts to worship her sternum. Her breathing is still ragged and uncoordinated when I finally reach her mouth, where I am greeted by clumsy, lazy kisses; like she can't catch her breath, but every part of her is desperately trying to connect with me. I run my hands up around her back and pull her into a tight embrace, sliding my thigh between hers to help support her ragdoll posture. The contact of my thigh between her legs causes her to shutter once more but I leave it there firmly. I like to feel the way her stomach contracts against mine as I snuggle into her while listening to her breathing and feeling her heartbeat come down. She gently kisses my neck and bites my collarbone; her hand slips up my back, clutching me tighter as the all-but-forgotten water beats against me. She leans close before my lips connect to hers and whispers, "We have to try the conditioner." I smirked against her mouth. She laughs, really nothing more than the giggle due to her elated fatigue. Then she reaches down and grabs the conditioner, popping the top with one had as she looks at me with heavy, hooded green eyes.

"Ready?" she asks. I turn around immediately. She puts the conditioner on her fingers, rubbing her palms together before gently massaging into my scalp over the sensitive areas where she scratched soreness into me. I laugh, remembering her touch, remembering the way it made me feel. A spark shoots to my core resulting in a jerky shudder. She chuckles behind me, a silent affirmation that I am wound up tight from all of our play. Aside from my blatant arousal, I feel so…warm and content. Quinn runs the conditioner through my hair while gently running her fingers down to the tips, brushing my hair straight with her fingers. I can hear a purr against me as she leans in to kiss my neck from behind, her fingers running up and down my shoulders gently. Her hands are clasping over my stomach pulling me into a tight hug; everything about her just feels right. She turns me slowly, hand gently cupping my chin, tilting my head back into the warm water. She kisses along my jaw, one hand braced against my lower back while her other hands slides down my front, cupping against me. A gasp comes out louder than I anticipate, the echo in the shower making it sound like a yelp of pain. I feel her lips tighten into a smile as she nips the skin along my neck while she slips her fingers through my lips, groaning at the embarrassing amount of wetness there.

"Rachel…look at me," she says huskily. I realize my eyes are clenched blindingly tight, as I bite into my bottom lip. I whimper as I slowly open my eyes, and am greeted by emerald green irises, her pupils dark with lust. "Look at me…I want to see you, all of you…" The last word is mouthed to me as she slips two fingers quickly and deftly into my opening.

"FUCK!" I all but scream as she slowly begins to thrust in and out, thumb slipping over my clit. Her hand scoops up against my back holding me still while she keeps her gaze locked on mine, halting her movements abruptly when I let my eyes flutter closed distractedly as I try to focus on a multitude of sensations.

My eyes snap open in response to her low growl, "Rachel…" I am immediately rewarded with her thumb grazing over my clit and her fingers resuming their slow, teasing thrusts again. The intensity of her gaze, coupled with the authoritativeness of the command send me over the edge quickly, my eyes widening as I whimper and writhe against her. She closes the distance between us, eyes closed as she presses a passionate, hungry kiss to my lips, clutching me close as my legs quiver. My arms wrap around her neck to keep myself up as my heart pounds outside of my chest, and I gasp to catch my breath. Quinn slows her hand, deepening our kiss as she slips her fingers out, quieting my "oh" with a gently teasing tongue. Her hands slide up my back before gently pressing my head into her shoulder as she hugs me against her, my body involuntarily convulsing as I come down. She rocks us slowly, cooing into my ear, "Mmmm, so good baby."

I smile into her shoulder; this is the first time she has affectionately called me something other than my name or a variety of nickname. I sigh contentedly as she leans back, kissing me sweetly before running her fingers through my hair, encouraging the water to flush the rest of the forgotten conditioner out. She smiles at me shyly as she silently resumes bathing me. We continue with the loofah and bar soap, exchanging intermittent kisses. Lingering touches along sides, kissing deeply, curious fingers raking over skin. It's got to be the best shower I ever had.

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So. How do we feel about the story so far? Should I scrap this and move on, or what? Review if you are feeling randy. ;) kiss kiss


	11. Chapter 10

**A/N: Hello, friends. Here's the next update. It's a little shorter than the last few, but, I have another one that I will post again shortly. Enjoy! :)**

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**Chapter Ten: Breakfast of Champions**

"So. That happened." Quinn smirks and meets my eyes in the mirror as she brushes her hair straight. I take the towel to my own hair as I bend over the sink. I gaze back at her through the glass; she's smiling at me, a toothy, foolish, happy grin. I can't help but match the wattage of her smile; it seems so fitting to be here with her. I feel at home, and it scares me as much as I enjoy it. She chuckles against me leaning in for sweet kisses as I brush my hair straight. She tightens her towel around her torso before turning to get me a little leave-in conditioner and some gel. She laughs and tells me to let my hair air dry, she doesn't want the hairdryer to stamp out the beautiful color and texture (her words). It surprises me; my hair is a light, chestnut brown, wavy, nothing extraordinary, but she seems to find it particularly attractive and it makes me blush. Eventually we made it to the kitchen fully clothed. I am positively starving at this point. The coffee we'd started (was it just this morning?) was put on ice, topped off and served chilled. Quinn was scrambling egg whites, spinach and cheese in the pan as I scanned over yesterday's paper. I have no real interest in the content, I find myself staring over the paper just watching her sway her hips while she cooks, humming quietly to herself. I can't help but smile as I sip my now-iced coffee, remembering last night…and this morning.

"What are you smiling about?" She giggles from the stove, snapping me out of my trance.

"Uh, nothing…well, you." I admit bashfully, my cheeks surely a deep crimson color. "Yeah? What about?" She smiles slyly, winking suggestively.

"Well, err, mostly about how much I like showering with you…" I smirked as I saw her face flush with color this time.

"Hmm, I know what you mean…I found it…titillating." She ducks her head and laughs nervously.

I scooted off the stool behind the counter and walked up to her, slipping my arms around her waist, pulling her close to me. I nuzzled my nose into her neck, gently kissing her skin. "Thanks for letting me use your shampoo AND conditioner…" I smiled against her neck.

Her shoulders shook as she laughed, gently pushing me off her before swatting my ass playfully and turning back to the eggs. "You are very welcome," she quipped, glancing over her shoulder with a wink.

Breakfast made, we moved to the dining room table, natural light from the open shades serving as our ambiance. It is amazing how much beautiful sunlight she got in this apartment. We casually talked about life, about some nonsense I pretended to glean from the paper when I was actually just ogling her ass. Breakfast was perfect: iced coffee, very strong, thank God, accompanied by the best eggs I've ever had, wheat toast and a mandatory multi-vitamin. Quinn all but demanded I "replenish my vitamins" after the shenanigans of the past few hours. I agreed only if she reciprocated my action with a kiss. She giggled and obliged, hand cupping my cheek and jaw gently, lingering softly against my lips before pecking me quickly and pulling away.

We sat in a serene silence for a bit, gently wrestling over the last triangle of toast, in the end agreeing to share it after I bit off a piece slightly larger than my half. She frowned then happily noshed the remaining slice, gently drumming her fingers over my outstretched hand. I instinctively laced my fingers with hers, leaning my head down to rest on my extended arm and watched her play with her hair while she gently squeezed and relaxed her fingers against mine. It was nothing more than casual affection, considering the amount of fierce contact that we had engaged in earlier, but something about the touch made my heart thump a little more enthusiastically in my chest. I felt warm and sleepy all at once, like I was being lulled to sleep by her touch.

"How long have you lived here?" I heard myself ask without thinking about my question.

She paused, hand loosening its grip on mine. I regretted the question instantly. "Um, about almost a year I guess." She looked away when she answered, sipping her coffee distractedly.

"Do you rent or…?" I already knew the answer. I could tell by her clothes, casual in my presence, but expensively made. I could tell by her car, her decorating taste, the diamonds I noticed tossed aside carelessly on her dresser. I knew by the detail of everything in this house that she did more than rent, but I wasn't sure why the question made her uncomfortable. Should I be uncomfortable too? Should I have pretended to ignore the fact that money appeared to be no problem to her? What did I really have to base these assumptions on? She had never done or said anything that inferred that she was anything more than a self-made woman, but the look on her face and the way she avoided eye contact now when before she had all but demanded it of me made me wary.

"Um, I own." Her answer is short, eyes directed to beyond me, looking out her perfectly lit windows at nothing. I can tell she doesn't want to talk about it, and I don't intend to push further. I didn't mean to start this conversation. In fact it surprises me that the words even left my mouth.

"Well, it's beautiful, and you have _excellent_ taste…but I may just be fishing for compliments." I smile slightly and squeeze her hand, a silent apology for making her uncomfortable. It's well-received; the ghost-like paleness of her face erased as it flushes with color when she returns my smile.

"Thank you," she smiles warmly before pulling my hand toward her and leaning in to kiss me lightly. "What are your plans for today?"

I hadn't thought about that. These were my plans for today… time with her, meals as needed, sex, sleep? We'd covered all these bases. I furrowed my brow, deep in thought considering what I needed to do today. "Well, this was my plan for today. I hadn't thought that far in advance I guess." I muttered sheepishly, suddenly embarrassed by my linear thought process.

She chuckled – it was reassuring, not condescending – and replied simply, "I meant, when do you have to get back? Is there something that you need to do today?"

"You." The answer blurted from my mouth before I could even think of a more sensible response. Extreme blush followed. "Um, I mean, spend time with you. That's my plan. I should probably make an appearance at my house later today. But otherwise, my only plan was to be with you. Does that make me lame?" I ask the last part expecting to be criticized, just hoping it's in good nature.

"Oh," she smiles widely, "Well, no. I don't think that's lame at all. Actually, I think it's adorable and it makes me want to devour your face in kisses… Wait, does that make me lame?" Her smile is smug as she leans forward slightly.

"No, it makes you appear very attractive and appealing. As a matter of fact, I think it makes you seem down to earth and lovely. And kissable, did I mention that?" I smile nervously as I close the distance between us, reaching for her other hand and pulling our hands to my lap before kissing her softly, slowly. She hums and smiles against my lips, pulling at my arms until I climb up on to her lap. My arm naturally wraps around her neck as I sit cradled in her lap, kissing her softly as she brushes my hair out of my face.

"No, you didn't mention that," she breathes out almost silently between kisses. "The feeling is mutual." The last bit comes out like a purr again. God, it's distracting how many perfect damn noises emit from her when we are together. I can't even pretend to have any resolve in a situation when such noises exist. I feel myself melt into her, sink lower into her lap as her fingers dance along my jaw, her other hand gently laying across my waist and stroking my side.

"I…I really like spending time with you." For some reason the words feel like daggers in my throat on the way out. Each one makes me feel like I'm choking on the letters; the syllables feel deadly. My breathing halts from the discomfort as my body tenses slightly.

She notices, but pretends to be blind to it, kissing me deeply and humming, "Mmm hmm," against my lips. Quinn breaks the kiss and leans back, smiling candidly before saying quietly, "Me too," and slowly gliding her thumb up my cheekbone affectionately.

We clean up breakfast, moving silently together, washing and drying dishes and glasses. Her hand occasionally lands on my back, a gentle kiss on my shoulder. She is affectionate but not in a predatory way, like she is expecting anything back in return. It's welcoming and well received; I like the way it makes me feel wanted, special. And my natural response is always to reciprocate, even though I know that's not her intention. I know she isn't prompting my physicality; it just comes naturally when we are together. The way I will sweep her bangs off to the side when they fall across her forehead messily, or the way my hand is magnetized to hers when we sit closely or walk in proximity to each other. I am surprised by my need to have some contact with her, which is something that feels foreign to me with others. The fact that Katie and I "cuddled" when I had a breakdown the other day was a new and surprising thing for me.

SHIT, Katie! She must be waiting for my call. The realization must accompany a tense physical reaction because Quinn looks up at me expectantly.

"I have to make a call, check in on my buddy." I say quickly to dispel any concerns she may have.

"Ah, your drunk friend from last night. I get it. Hangovers are the worst." She nods and resumes drying her dishes.

"I'll be right back," I lean into her, bumping my hip against hers. She smiles warmly and nods, continuing with her task.

I jog out of the kitchen and search for my phone. I find it in my purse, which never made it past the threshold foyer last night. The memory makes me smile and I am momentarily distracted from my hunt. I look down at my phone expectantly, assuming that some clarity will return to me to remind me why I'm crouching in Quinn's hallway remembering our "greeting" when I notice the blinking red light in the corner of my BlackBerry alerting me to a notification. I frown at the unwelcomed distraction this may bring and quickly type in my password to unlock my phone. I am greeted by three texts and a voicemail. Okay, first things first, texts are less formal and require less attention. Thankfully two out of three are from Katie:

Katie: _Thnx 4 the food last night. Sushi and liquor = BAD idea._

Katie: _PS- don't respond to my texts if u r getting laid, only text back if u need me. K, kisses, happy Saturday hooker! ;)_

I couldn't help but chuckle, she's a conniving little beast, but I love her. And know I am going to be greeted with a barrage of invasive questioning upon seeing her, but in this moment I don't mind.

The third text was from Mom:

Mom: _Hi, can you pick up milk? See you later, call me before you head home in case we need something else._

Well, that went better than I thought. Milk is no problem, details that she may ask about my "night" with Katie…that's another story. Let's hope I can keep a straight face when I lie to her about uneventful moaning from Katie about her boyfriend while likely having vivid flashbacks of the much more intimate moaning of my night and morning with Quinn.

The voicemail is what disturbs me. It's a rambling message from Dane, full of curses, babbling, and accusations from 3am last night. The content itself doesn't bother me; I already received one drunk dial from him last night. The thing that bothers me is that, upon closer inspection, I can see he called me twice since then without leaving a message, once at 10:30am and another about 30 minutes ago.

Dane and I haven't "talked" on the phone ever. Our communication was texts and lustful glances at parties. I didn't date him, but I was "involved" with him I guess. Honestly, though, it had been months since we had any contact in that way. Ironically, my desire to spend time with him dwindled the longer I spent with him. I especially noticed more and more that I disliked the person he became when he drank, a point I attempted to get across when I stopped returning his aggressive sexts. Of course, that went well. My turning down his advances at one of Logan's parties during Spring Break is infamous amongst our friends. Luckily, Katie and Logan were both sober enough that night to have Dane tossed before he broke anything more than a few odd, mismatched glasses in his fury. That was the first night he had shoved me. I remember the hurt on his face when I rejected him. His immediate response was to push me, but I think he forgets his size. The shove nearly threw me across the room; had Logan not been standing behind me to cushion the blow I may have been genuinely hurt.

The memory of this brings my hand to my face, fingertips tracing over my injuries from last night. I stood up from the floor while listening to his message and found myself staring at my reflection in the foyer mirror while my fingers danced over the small cuts in my cheek. They were an angry red, but very small, and the bruising was almost unnoticeable. That's the thing about my skin. I bruise easily. When Dane shoved me a few months back I had a near-perfect hand print on my chest; a lingering reminder of emotional and physical discomfort that came with that night. I turned my head to the side to get a better look at my cheek, and notice a faint bite mark over my collarbone when my shirt dips with my movement. Now _this_ mark I don't mind; a wicked smile flashes across my face as I try to remember just when this little love bite occurred.

Quinn shakes me from my self-scrutiny by calling my name out, "Hey, Rach?" I toss my phone back into my purse and jog over to the sound of her voice. She's in the living room and wants help moving the furniture back in place. I'm happy for the distraction.

We spend the rest of the early afternoon attempting to "watch" something on TV but end up wrestling over the blanket and misplacing clothes in the meantime. I awake from a mid-afternoon nap with my cheek pressed to her bra-clad chest, her gently kissing my forehead, hands stroking up and down my arm. I snuggled closer to her as she giggles, "I have to pee, babe." I just groan and press a wet kiss to her neck as she squirms below me while laughing. "Seriously, I waited as long as I could, I gotta pee!" She laughs and wiggles her hips while gently pushing me up and off her to crawl out. I lazily swipe at her butt as she skips away from the couch to the safety of the bathroom. When she gets back I have cocooned myself in the throw blanket and burrowed face down into the plush safety of the sofa.

"Still tired?" I can hear the smile in her voice as she gently tugs at the blanket cocoon.

"Ungh" I grunt and pull back on the blanket, rolling in so my face is against the back of the couch.

I hear her chuckle then sit down on the edge of the couch behind me. She scoots up close to me, draping her arm and leg around me, spooning against me. She kisses below my ear, gently nipping at my ear lobe before whispering, "Hey there, sleepy girl. Got any room for me?"

I nodded silently and scooted closer to the couch, careful to leave plenty of room for her to cuddle up behind me. I wiggled my arms free of the cocoon and shrugged off the blanket so she could scoop her arm against my naked torso with an encouraging, "Mmmmm." We lay like this for awhile, Quinn gently drawing shapes on my abdomen with her fingers, kissing me sweetly and whispering, "You are very soft. I like being this close to you." I purr contentedly and press against her front with more force to increase the contact. I am rewarded with a tight hug and soft kisses to my neck. I like being this close to her, too. I should repeat it easily, but the words feel too big for my mouth. I resolve to nod and snuggle deeper into the couch, her arms around me protectively. I feel like I could die a happy girl in this moment. There is nowhere else I'd rather be. The thought frightens me. I feel my pulse start to pick up, my head feels a little dizzy and I can hear my breathing in my ears like concert speakers from the mosh pit; loud, painful and invasive. Luckily, Quinn's phone rings at this exact panic moment and she seems to miss the symptoms of my impending breakdown, although I have no explanation as to why I am all of a sudden freaking out.

Quinn reaches blindly for the phone, arm and leg still around me before nearly dropping it off the cradle next to our heads. She leans back and looks at the caller ID screen, blinking slowly before holding her breath suddenly. Her body gets tense and her breathing alerts me to pay attention. I gently shrug off her arm and leg turning quickly so I am facing her. Her eyes dart toward mine and she shakes her head slightly before leaping off the couch and springing out of the room. Before she got to the doorway I heard her answer the phone, "Hello?" a male voice began talking, but I couldn't make out what he was saying. I felt my brow furrow before one eye brow arched in curiosity. Or maybe jealousy.

The sudden disappearance of her body from mine sends a shiver up my near-naked torso. I reach instinctively for the blanket, but decide instead to locate my clothing. Something about that phone call gave me a bad feeling. Maybe it was the unnerving calls from Dane that made me feel a little apprehensive, or maybe it was the look of mild terror Quinn had on her face before fleeing the room. She could have let it go to voicemail, but something made her answer it, something made her leave the room to talk with this person. I wonder what it's about; or, rather, who it is? I guess I shouldn't be too surprised/offended/jealous/angry. All of those emotions seem to be pooling in my chest right now. I don't know her very well, hell, I've only known her a few weeks. It hadn't occurred to me to ask if she had a boyfriend, or a girlfriend for that matter. Come to think about it, I really don't know anything about her, other than the fact that she works at publishing company, lives alone, owns an expensively-decorated home and drives a nice car. Oh, and that she's hot, and a great kisser, and smells like vanilla with a musky undertone that makes my heart flutter when I catch the scent on my clothes or hair after I've left her presence. But, of substance? I know very little. It seems pertinent to learn more about this woman, I mean, we are officially sleeping together. What that means, I don't know. Are we dating? Do we have a "thing?" Will I continue to see her after my volitold work ends? All of a sudden I have a lot of questions and the only one who has the answers is in the other room talking to some guy on the phone. I feel myself losing control over the angry emotion in my chest, insecurity sneaking in to cloak my previously happy mood. I stand up from the sofa and gather her clothes, fold the blanket, rearrange the magazines on the living room table. I have a lot of energy that makes me feel like I need to move around. Now.

I shuffle out to the kitchen, pour myself a glass of water I don't want to drink and force it down. My fingers tap on the sink's edge. I can hear her talking, but I can't make out what she is saying. I assume she is in her office, because I don't think I could hear her if she were in the bedroom. I can tell that the conversation is strained; the tone of her voice sounds harsh and short. It doesn't sound like the kind of conversation you have with a close friend. But it could be a boss, or a loved one… I find myself grinding my teeth slightly as I stare out the kitchen window at the fountain in the courtyard. The late-day sun makes it look like a scene from a movie, marble glowing in the escaping daylight surrounded by lush, vibrant flowers spilling from their pots in a perfectly manicured way. The water looks fake as it pools in the base of the fountain, the light illuminating gentle splashes as it cascades down. The angle of sunlight on the marble fountain triggers me to glance up at the kitchen clock and I see that the afternoon is quickly becoming evening. I have to leave soon, but I don't want to interrupt Quinn or her phone call. Even though I am uncomfortably curious, part of me wants to pretend it hasn't happened.

Quinn emerges from the office with a quiet huff, brow furrowed, lips in a thin, pursed line. I am leaning with my back against the counter, facing out toward the living room, anxiously tapping my foot as I listen to the second hand tick rhythmically next to me. The ticking seems deafening in this moment, and my eyes follow Quinn as she returns the phone to the cradle. She surveys the couch, glancing at her folded blanket and clothes. A small frown tugs at her pursed lips, her hand pressing up to her forehead and gripping the bridge of her nose. She closes her eyes and I see a small shudder rock through her shoulders. It occurs to me that she may not know she has a silent audience in this moment. A moment that I now feel I am intruding upon. The reaction doesn't last long; she quickly, silently, composes herself, brushing her hair out of her face and running her thumb under her eyes. I turn hurriedly so my back is to her and fuss with my water glass. I hear her pad into the kitchen a moment or two later. She is fully dressed, wearing a forced smile.

"Hey, sorry about that," she says in a sing-songy tone.

"Oh, that's okay." I'm not sure how to reply, my insides are a tornado of confusion right now.

"No. I should have let it go to voicemail," she muttered with mild irritation, pouting exaggeratedly before saying, "I vaguely remember you with less clothes on."

I laughed, glad that the topic of the phone call was being avoided, and shrugged innocently, "I got cold without you, then felt weird being on your couch half naked in the middle of the day."

"Kind of sounds like a perfect afternoon to me," she murmurs quietly as she approaches me in the kitchen. Her hands are at my waist in a flash, thumbs slipping under the hem of my shirt, warm lips kissing along my jaw. I know she is trying to distract me, keep me from asking too many questions. She is successful. All I can think about is how good it feels to have her against me again, hungry mouth kissing along my jaw to the curve of my smile. Quinn is very good at distracting me, and I don't resist. My time with her has been perfect until this point; why ruin it now?

Her fingers lightly scratch at my stomach, hands slipping under the fabric hastily. My hands slide around her sides, gripping her ass tightly while pulling her against me. She moans and licks her tongue across my lips. My eyes are closed but I can feel them as they roll into the back of my head from the swipe of her tongue against mine. We kiss passionately, fighting over dominance for a few minutes, breaking apart only to breathe. She smiles and pecks my lips quickly before tugging me into a tight hug. I slide my hands up her back, gripping her shoulders and snuggling my head into her neck.

"You have to go now, huh?" she whispers against my forehead, kissing me softly. I nod and burrow my face deeper into her neck with a whine. "I loved having you all to myself. It's nice waking up with you," her voice gets softer and softer until she is almost inaudible.

I lift up my head and look into suddenly sad green eyes. I kiss her deeply, saying all the things I want to but can't with the intensity of my kiss. As if understanding, she kisses back and nods subtly, hands cupping my face, lifting my chin. "I'll miss you," I whisper against her mouth, overcome by a sudden emotion that feels like despair and sadness. She kisses me sweetly before leaning back and sighing. I let my hands slide away from her body and turn towards the bedroom to retrieve my overnight bag.

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Aren't they cute together? Lots of adorable fluff in this last little update. What's up with Quinn, though? Hmmm.


	12. Chapter 11

**Here you go. :) Also- I know that some of you aren't getting update emails, :(, I will look into this.**

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**Chapter Eleven: The Fib**

I think about our good-bye on the drive to the store to pick up milk and chocolate chip cookie ingredients. Evidently Mom is being very domestic tonight. She was chipper when I called to tell her I was on route, adding a few things on my list to pick up. She must have had a good sales day; hopefully the cookies are for Cody and me. A smile spreads across my face at the prospect of seeing my family. It's not the typical reaction I have towards them. In fact, I do seem to be happier than usual lately. Maybe it's all the great sex. Maybe it's Quinn. Warmth floods my chest and face as I remember the past night we spent together. I was sad to leave her, but felt satisfied to see the same reaction scrawled across her face as well. She makes me feel important and special. It was a new, refreshing feeling.

I called Katie as I strolled through the supermarket filling my cart with my mother's grocery list. She reports recovering from her hangover sometime after lunch today, following a night spent face-down on the couch after our late night snack attack. Ruari went out with her friends but came home early to make sure Katie didn't choke on her own vomit (charming visual, thanks Katie). Logan called her twice before showing up at Ruari's place with Katie's favorite ice cream and some sheet music she had been lusting over. All has been forgiven, apologies and make-up sex exchanged, life's insanity resumed. We talk about her upcoming recital, and she asks me to hang out with her afterwards, demanding that I arrive to the performance early and sit by the aisle so she can see me. I think she is more nervous than ever before. There will be a lot of people there scouting her talent. I wonder if she feels like a piece of meat up for auction, and remind myself to ask her next time. Katie stops talking abruptly, pausing for what I assume is a response to a question I must not have heard, "Hello? You still there?"

"Huh? Yeah, sorry. I'm looking for butter right now; did you know there are like twenty types of butter? Which one should I get?"

"Well, that depends, what is the butter for?" I can hear a smile in her response, "Butter for cooking or for bedroom play?"

"Katie! Seriously! What is wrong with you?! My mom is making cookies." I scoff and pull the phone away from my face glaring at the screen.

"Relax! C'mon, that was hilarious," she teases. "Cookies? Hmm, unsweetened, lightly salted butter."

"How do you even know that? Since when do you cook?" I ask.

"First of all, _chica_, it's baking, not cooking. And I happen to be an excellent baker. Something you may experience sometimes if you ever actually stay over my place for a night, instead of just saying that you are…Speaking of which, how'd that go?" she chuckles.

"It went…great." I can feel the goofy grin on my face as I reach down to grab some eggs.

"That good, huh? Wow, you sound like a different person. I have to meet this chick, 'cuz she's making you soft." She cackles at her own humor before adding quickly. "Just kidding Romeo, don't get all crazy on me."

I laugh, losing count of which eggs I've checked and which ones I haven't. "You know, that was the first full night I've ever spent with someone." I admit to her sheepishly.

"Aww. Rach, that's really sweet. You really like her, huh?" She asks quietly.

"Yeah, I do. It's sort of terrifying actually," I feel my brow furrow and a small frown pulls at my mouth, "I don't know very much about her at all."

"Well, seems like the perfect reason to investigate that then. I'm glad you're happy. Remember what I said before, okay? Make sure you keep me in the loop; I want to be there for you. Promise?"

"I promise. Thanks." I nod appreciatively to no one in particular as I walk out of the dairy section towards the register. I notice a tall teenager to my right restocking bananas when Dane flashes across my thoughts.

"Hey, any word from Logan on Dane? Did he survive the embarrassment of incontinence?" I laugh with my questions, but I am digging for answers.

"Actually, I have no idea. Logan said he got back and the place was a mess, broken bottle shards everywhere. I told him that was because your face and the wall got in the way of Dane's pitching practice. He was pretty ripped about it, said he and the roomies were going to 'chat' with Dane and his friends to let them know that shit isn't allowed. God only knows what that means. They'll figure it out, I'm sure. But Logan's tolerance for Dane is nonexistent since that incident over Spring Break. I think this was his last shot. Fine by me, that fucker needs a good beating." She says with an edge of irritation in her voice.

"He called me at like 3am with another rambling message after we left, but the weird thing is he called me twice this morning too." I have a perplexed look on my face as I tell her this; the cashier shoots me a glance as if my expression indicates he did something wrong. I shake my head and point to the phone, mouthing apologies for being rude.

"He's a special creature, that Goliath. If you figure out what he wants, fill me in…" She changes her thought process mid statement. "Actually, are you going to call him back?"

"I haven't decided. I'm pretty pissed about the bottle thing. Make-up covered most of the damage, but he could have really hurt me. I think I need to stay as far away from him as possible. Two strikes are enough for me to know better, I would hope…" I mumble the last bit, face scrunched in confusion.

"You know Rach, I think he really liked you, maybe more than he was able to communicate through that dumb jock skull of his. Not that that excuses his asshole tendencies, but he may just be trying to talk to you about it," Katie reasons theoretically.

"Who knows?" I shrug before continuing, "I'll keep you posted. I think for right now I'm just going to let it go a bit, give me some time to cool off."

"Sounds good, hey if your Mom starts asking questions she can call over to Ruari, I told her about the fib."

"Thanks. Wait, what else did you tell her?" I ask slightly alarmed.

"Just that you needed a respite from your parents and that, more importantly, you needed to get laid immediately to improve the black cloud mood you've been rocking for the past few months. Don't worry, I didn't mention you were seducing a cougar." She laughs maniacally.

"Hey! She is not a cougar!" I bark defensively into the phone before muttering an appreciative, "Thanks again, Katie."

"Hahaha, no problem. I want to meet this mystery lady soon, okay? Call me tomorrow."

I said good-bye and walked my purchases out to the car. The ride to my house was quick. My mother's car was in the driveway, and I could see Cody dragging in the empty trash cans as I pulled in.

"Hey champ! How was the amusement park?" I jog over to help him.

He looks at me like I have three heads, "Um, good, I did that Sky Coaster thing where you are up like 100 feet in the on a rip cord, it was awesome." He smiles broadly, puffing out his chest in pride; heights are not Cody's favorite thing so this is a big deal. "Wait, why are you in such a good mood?" he asks, eyeing me suspiciously.

"What? Why can't I be in a good mood? It's Saturday, sun's out, no homework, and Mom had me pick up cookie fixings." I say encouragingly.

"Really? Score!" he grins and gives me a high-five before helping me carry in some groceries. Mom is humming in the kitchen, busily basting meat for dinner when I walk in. She smiles and gives us both a quick hug saying something about being happy all her "chicks are in the nest" or something along those lines. My mother's big presentation must have gone off without a hitch because there is a full dinner on the table twenty minutes later and we all sit together making cookies afterwards. Granted Cody eats a good portion of the batter while Mom was distracted, but we had enough to make a medium sized platter of cookies. Cody and I wrestled over the gooiest one from the middle before I snatched it away when telling him I saw Kristy at the store. His eyes bulged momentarily distracting him long enough for me to win the cookie war. Kristy is Cody's big crush; she is in his grade, and very pretty. Ironically, she a member of both the cheerleading squad and the God squad simultaneously, but still manages to remain sweet while most cheerleaders at our school are a little snooty and tend to be unapproachable. Cody's face flushes when I tell him I was just kidding and he swats at my hand before pinching my side. My mother intervenes before a tickle fight erupts.

Shortly after the cookies cooled, my Dad arrived home early from his Man's Weekend because his buddy broke his foot kicking at a raccoon that was devouring unattended trash. Said buddy was drunk and had terrible aim, kicking a tree instead the animal and the raccoon ran off with the food. It was a lose-lose all around, except for the satiated raccoon. Serves him right. Johnny is a bit of a slime ball with a bad habit of letting his eyes linger a little too long on my chest whenever I see him. Dad has known him forever, so I think he turns a blind eye, but Cody caught him staring one day and rocketed a soccer ball at his nuts. Since then we both have been a little cool to Johnny being around, but Dad seems oblivious as always.

I'm glad I left Quinn's when I did because all of a sudden I'm in a full house. My mind wandered back to her, that strange phone call, the way she avoided answering me about her apartment. We should probably talk about stuff. The thought makes my stomach flutter with unease, but I'm not sure why.

My mother and father go to bed early; Cody, exhausted from his high flying adventure falls asleep in front of his Xbox, headphones still on. It's close to midnight when I slip down the stairs and jot a quick note:

_Hey Guys!, Heading to Dr. Valestrom's early to assist with some overhaul chart work- will be a long day. :-P I'm going to hit the gym when I'm done. Will be back before dinner, call if you need me. Xoxo_

It wasn't entirely a fib. I would be working out, I hoped, and I might even swing by the office for good measure to set up a work schedule and shuffle some papers. This genius escape idea came to me after dinner when for the umpteenth time my mind wandered to Quinn and what she may be doing, eating, wearing, not wearing. The best way to break the ice toward those deeper topics is a little flirty texting to see if she was up for the challenge:

Me: _hey lady, whats good?_

Quinn: _hmm, i was just thinking bout u_

Me: _oh yeah? What about?_

Quinn: _my secret, when d again?_

Me: _plans tonight?_

Quinn: _sounds promising, maybe. What do u have in mind?_

Me: _late dessert?_

Quinn: _i will get the ingredients ;)_

Me: _yum, will text soon_

She greeted me at the door, with a warm smile, glittering eyes, in a skin-tight tank top and boy shorts, holding a pint of blueberries. This is going to be the best dessert ever.

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**Hey Guys! Thanks for the reviews. This a short chapter, but I have the second part wrapped up and ready to go. Maybe I will post it faster if you let me know what you think about the way the story is going...Doesn't dessert sound awesome about now? ;)**


	13. Chapter 12

**A/N: Well, well, well. Things are about to get interesting. And sticky? Maybe a little sticky. Hahaha.**

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**Chapter Twelve: A Change of Heart**

I was barely in the doorway before Quinn embraced me in a bone crushing hug, kissing my neck and murmuring, "I missed you" into my ear. I communicated my own intense feeling with a megawatt smile, gently lifting her off the ground with a reciprocating bear hug. We kissed sweetly for a moment in the hallway before she grasped my hand and tugged me toward the dining room.

"How'd you get away unnoticed?" she asked quietly, eyes flickering over my lips.

"I'm stealth like a ninja…" I quipped playfully, tugging her hand in mine and spinning her to kiss me quickly.

"Yeah, right, and graceful like a gazelle I bet… No, seriously?" She furrowed her brow in concern, but the small smile on her lips betrayed her mock seriousness.

"I waited until the family fell asleep, wrote a note and slipped out. I should be good until mid afternoon, just a few phone calls and texts and I should be in the clear." I smiled confidently at my own dastardly plan, because in this moment I feel invincible again. Being in Quinn's presence has that effect on me.

"Mmm, you're positively wicked, I like." Quinn's eyes were dark and she licked her lips before leaning in to kiss me more deeply, gently tugging my hands and walking backwards, leading me to our destination. I gasped for breath, breaking the kiss before opening my eyes and looking around the room. She had set up a sundae station in the dining room. There were bowls of blueberries, sliced strawberries, freshly whipped cream and chocolate chips. A bowl of what looked like water next to some small cloths. The center of the table was lined with a thick, fluffy blanket, the surrounding furniture and windows were illuminated with tea lights and candles. The overhead light had been dimmed.

I whipped my head to look at her, jaw hanging open, eyes wide with surprise. She laughed and looked away sheepishly, suddenly shy under the scrutiny of my gaze. She stepped closer to me, hands on my hips as she kissed the surprise away from my face, occupying my mouth with hers. She had gently walked me back to the table while dancing her hands along the waist of my jeans, toying with the button before popping it open. I was distracted by her hot mouth and did little to assist, nothing to resist.

She expertly unzipped my zipper in a slow drag, one tooth at a time as my hands gripped tightly at her hips and back. I had the clarity to kick off my shoes when she broke our kiss to slowly pull down my pants, easing off my socks when I stepped out of the abandoned clothing. She was kneeling when she kissed up the soft skin on the inside of my knee, partway up to my thigh before my unexpectedly loud gasp caused her to giggle. She leaned back and stood slowly, careful to keep the pads of her fingers on my skin, slipping up my hips and under my loose t-shirt, tugging it over my head.

I was standing by the table, in my matching lace underwear, her hands all over my thin waist, tracing over ribs, gently squeezing clothed breasts. She unhooked my bra and slid it from my shoulders, a difficult task because I had pulled her impossibly closer to me, kissing her deeply, devouring the skin of her neck. She responded by leaning back, out of reach of my mouth, smiling apologetically before gently pushing my hips back into the table, motioning for me to sit on it. I arched my eyebrow, intrigued, and did as she silently requested, perching myself on the end of her beautiful wooden table on the fluffy blanket draped across it. She placed my hands behind my back, wrists and elbows extended so that I was leaning comfortably on my hands, slightly reclined. She stepped between my bent knees and gripped my hips tightly, letting her fingers and hands drag up my sides, over my breasts to cup my face. I shuddered at her touch, her hands almost hot to my naked skin. She curled her fingers under my jaw, holding my face close to hers before she experimentally licked at my lips, teasing me with her tongue. I opened my mouth automatically, welcoming her into me eagerly. She was obviously excited, tongue lapping at my teeth, dominating my own as she explored my mouth. My hands wandered down her back, tugging at the hem of her tank top before she swatted my hands away, leaning back to whisper, "Dessert first, silly," before she reconnected our lips with renewed urgency.

"Close your eyes," the command came out like a purr when my eyes popped open after she broke the kiss suddenly. I nodded obediently, closing my eyes and pouting slightly from the absence of her body against mine. She clicked her tongue disapprovingly when I peeked my eyes open a bit to see her reaching for the fruit bowls to my right.

"Now, now. If you aren't going to play along, then we will not be able to play at all." She put one hand on her hip, the other holding a bowl as I looked up at her sheepishly, pouting and nodding silently that I would follow the rules. I smiled quickly, leaning in to peck her lips before settling back on my hands and closing my eyes.

"Ok, that's better. We are going to have a little dessert tonight, but the key to the success of this game is that you let me feed you and you keep your eyes closed. You can ask me questions, but will only get answers if you do as I ask. Fair enough?" I can hear the smile in her voice as she goads me into playing. I nod happily and smile back at her, eyes remaining closed.

I hear the floor shift slightly as she walks her fingertips up from my hip to my abdomen, and slowly up the valley between my breasts before cupping my chin and tilting my head up. She leans forward to kiss me softly, sucking my bottom lip between hers and biting down gently to pull my mouth open slightly. I groan in approval and feel her fingers gently dancing over my wet, swollen lips before popping a few small objects into my mouth. She closes my mouth with her fingers, kissing my lips sweetly as I roll my tongue over the new textures and tastes. I identify the rich, sugary flavor of chocolate with soft, smooth bits of strawberry pieces. Humming approvingly, I gently chew my dessert as she kisses along my jaw, fingers teasing up and down my sides, lingering along the soft swell of the side of my breasts. I lean into her touch, licking my lips and waiting patiently for what's coming next.

Her hand palms at my naked breast while the other swipes a deft finger along my lips, coating them with something cool and sweet smelling. I part them quickly with a gasp from the feeling of her hand on my chest and lick the substance into my mouth, smiling contentedly as I taste whipped cream. Her fingers begin to roll my nipple, eliciting another open mouth gasp as I feel her index finger dance along my lips again. I suck her finger into my mouth and am greeted by a large amount of whipped topping covering her finger that I lick and suck off greedily. Her palm leaves my breast and disappears before sliding up to my lips and slipping a few blueberries into my mouth. She pulls her fingers out and lets me chew on the blueberries and whipped topping as she kisses along my cheek down to my neck, nibbling gently before kissing the irritated areas.

"Mmm, delicious," I mutter, licking my lips and biting down on my now-swollen bottom lip, sucking it gently into my mouth as I feel my breathing start to increase, chest rising and pressing against the cotton fabric of her tank top as she works her mouth on my neck. "Can I have more?" it comes out almost pleadingly, breathy and punctuated with gasps as she bites down on my collarbone, hands roaming over my naked stomach.

"Mmmhmm," she brings her mouth back to mine, licking at my bottom lip as I release it from my teeth. "Lean back, lay down," she breathes against my mouth, between deep, wet kisses and gently presses her body against mine until I am flat on the table. I slide up the surface, eyes closed until my feet are firmly placed on the tabletop. She crawls up my body, breaking the kiss only long enough to reach beside me into one of the magic bowls to my right. A large, soft, wet strawberry slice glides over my bottom lip as I feel her lips wrap around the now erect bud on my breast. I shiver and arch my back involuntarily as my tongue dances over her fingers, pulling the sweet fruit into my mouth. She gently sucks on my nipple and drags a whipped cream covered finger over my lips as I chew on the strawberry slice slowly, allowing the juices to pool in my mouth and mix with the cream I lap excitedly in as well. She continues to work my nipple before traveling to the other breast, leaving wet kisses along the way, her fingers rolling a plump blueberry around the perimeter of my lips, dancing back slightly when I open them expectantly to taste the fruit. I grunt in disapproval, lifting my head slightly to catch the fruit, at which point she releases my nipple with a wet "pop" and chuckles quietly, "Patience, Rachel…" she purrs teasingly.

I scrunch my forehead in frustration and lay my head back against the soft blanket, rewarded immediately with the juicy berry pushed past my lips, eliminating my frown entirely. Quinn is hovering over me now, hand beside my head, kissing at my mouth as I hum and chew appreciatively. She parts my lips with her tongue and I feel a jolt of sweet and tangy chocolate enter my mouth, warm and welcoming. My hands go up to her cheeks involuntarily, deepening our kiss and pulling her close to me. My breathing is ragged and I can feel myself gently rocking my hips into her flat stomach eagerly. Quinn smiles against my mouth, and brushes the hair off my face before trickling wandering fingers down my neck and chest, pausing momentarily to squeeze my breast before disappearing entirely. She kisses me quickly before I have the chance to complain and I feel her fingers return to my breast, cool and sticky. My eyes pop open on their own accord as she slithers down my body, sucking the whipped cream covered nipple into her mouth, looking up at me expectantly, raising her eyebrows in disapproval to my disobedience. I can't help but stare momentarily, gaze locked on her perfect lips that are sending lightning bolts to my core. Her other hand, also coated in whipped topping, dances menacingly close to my other neglected nipple. Quinn abruptly stops sucking, arching her eyebrow up even further, challenging me to continue watching as she moves to my other sticky nipple. I nod in understanding and close my eyes, dropping my head back before grasping both my hands into the thin blond hair in front of me, groaning appreciatively as she teases and bites my nipple. Her hands wander lower and tug at the waistband of my panties, gently stroking along my side, so I raise my hips to help.

Having my eyes closed makes all of these sensations so much more intense. I hear Quinn moan contentedly as she looks at my naked and absolutely drenched core. I hear her fingernails gently scrape the bowls by my head before rustling up to my mouth, depositing fruit and cream against my lips, her breathing just barely audible above the wanting pants from me. The berries and cream explode with flavor in my mouth as I chew softly, tongue lolling lazily over the textures and tastes. I'm so focused on the flavors I almost don't notice her kissing down my abdomen, nudging my legs apart with her hands and shoulders until she is just millimeters above my swollen and wet lips. "Oh…Quinn, please…" I beg as I feel her breath hot against me, sending sparks along my body, behind my closed eyes. I'm terrified, because although we played this game in the shower earlier, I've never been on the receiving end. But I'm so turned on from the groping and blind food play that my body is all but canting against her face. I don't think I have ever been so turned on in my life. I hear, smell and taste things so completely and entirely vividly right now that just her proximity to my slit is making me feel like I could climax.

Her palms slip down my sides and grip my hips strongly before she lowers her mouth to my core, kissing deeply and spreading her lips through my wetness. I gasp in surprise at the feeling, eyes opening automatically as my heart beats ferociously. She licks and sucks my lips, moving up to my clit and teasing it with her teeth gently while she pins my thrusting hips to the table with surprising strength. I'm whining and groaning, loudly, as my fingers claw into her head and scratch at her neck, gripping at her hand on my hip in frustration as the tightness winds slowly in my stomach. She drags her tongue achingly slow over my sex until she gently prods at my opening. I groan and spread my legs wider, begging for more contact, begging to be filled by her tongue. She slips in quickly; I can hear the wetness encasing her lips as she hums into me, quietly sending fire through my legs and abdomen. I feel my body begin to curl up in response to her, my eyes now wide open and locked on her bobbing head between my legs. I'm panting, uncoordinated, starving breaths, hands clutching at any part of her I can reach, "OhmyfuckingGod," tumbles from my lips as she glances up at me, making direct eye contact and curling her tongue inside me. All my walls break and the ocean floods through my core, an orgasm tearing through my body with such ferocity and quickness that I stop breathing entirely, eyes wide, mouth agape in shock. I vaguely remember a high pitched cry escaping my lips but it sounds like someone else, very far off, almost animal in nature. Quinn continues to hold my gaze as she laps lazily at my soaked lips, kissing and sucking gently as I come down from my high. My head drops back against the table with a loud "thud" and she leaves one last slow, lingering kiss to my pulsing clit before slipping up my body and pressing herself flat against me. My stomach and thighs are twitching with pleasure, accentuated by the pressure of her body when she lowers her mouth to mine, allowing me to taste myself on her. I groan at the sensation and taste the flavor nervously, unsure and immediately insecure of how I may taste to her.

She must sense my hesitation as she licks at my lips before whispering, "Baby, you taste amazing." I whimper in response, the noise swallowed by her lips as she presses against my mouth again, kissing my concerns away, fingers gently tracing circles along my naked sides as my heartbeat slows against hers.

After a few minutes she props herself up on her elbow, reaching next to me to pluck a hand full of blueberries, feeding some to me, tossing the rest in her mouth and chewing happily. She picks up a strawberry slice and puts it between my lips before leaning down to kiss it into her mouth, repeating the action with a spoonful of whipped cream. Her eyes are glowing green over me as she looks down smiling from above me. I trace the perfect bone structure of her face with a fingertip still throbbing from my release, my hand slightly shaky and clumsy in its movements. She presses her face against my hand, turning her head to kiss my palm affectionately, then leans back and dips a cloth into a water bowl, gently swiping it along my chest, over my nipples, removing the sticky residue of our food play. She teasingly drags the cool cloth down my stomach, eliciting shudders and causing my back to arch from the sensation of rough and cool and wet. My clit throbs with arousal as she creeps closer and closer.

I slip my hand down her arm, grasping her wrist lightly before I lean in to her ear and whisper, "Dessert was great, but I really just want to fuck you now," as I nip at her earlobe, tugging her down toward me. She gasps and moans, disregarding the wet cloth and grabbing frantically at my hand. She catches my hand and presses it flat against her abdomen, leading my fingers under the elastic of her boy shorts. Her eyes are heavy hooded lids, just inches from my own as she licks her lips at the movement of my hand into her panties. I nudge my leg between hers as she leans back, helping me pull down her shorts before straddling my thigh. I can feel how wet she is against the skin on my leg long before my fingers finally get to her hot, slick lips. Her eyes widen as I slip through her, amazed at how wet she is. I moan in approval as I start to twirl and dip, dragging my thumb across her clit as my fingers reach lower. She starts to pant and rock against my thigh, seeking friction. She lifts her hips up suddenly, eyes boring into my own, begging. I smile up at her and dart forward, kissing her quickly as I slip two fingers into her and curl up. She cries out against my mouth and rocks down hard and fast, pinning my hand against my thigh, muscles squeezing my fingers together in the hot, wet inside. She pulls back from my kiss just enough to put her forehead against mine as she lifts and rocks down into my hand, faster and faster each time. She is gasping and whimpering as I palm her breast with my other hand, tweaking her nipple through her tank top when she arches her back and thrashes her head with pleasure.

I watch the beauty that is Quinn as she yanks her own tank top over her head, revealing a bra-less chest, and hot pink, glowing nipples. I lay back onto the table, letting my left hand drag down her taut stomach to rub slow circles on her clit while she continues to ride hard on my right as she palms aggressively at her own chest. I can see the flush in her chest, crawling up into her neck, her cheeks a rosy hue as her eyes flicker open and closed with each deepening thrust. She rolls her hips and leans forward slightly, hands falling to my chest to support herself as she increases the angle for me to penetrate. I curl my fingers and increase the pace I have on her clit as I watch her eyes start to roll into her head. She's muttering incoherent things, licking her lips and shuddering against me. Her arms begin to quiver against my chest as I see her struggle to hold herself up while she is tightening around my fingers more with each thrust. "Come for me, baby…" I coo encouragingly as I lift my head to reach her mouth. Her eyes flash brightly at my words, widening momentarily before clenching shut, mouth crushing against mine and her body engulfing in spasms.

Her arms slip away from my chest and she drops to me like a rag doll, my fingers still buried inside her, thigh pressed against her. She is gasping for air, chest heaving, her heart racing against mine as I lower my thigh and begin to pull my fingers out. She whimpers when we are separated and watches me as I pop my fingers into my mouth, licking and sucking them eagerly. She leans forward and kisses my lips, her tongue dancing around the knuckles of my fingers as I slowly pull them out before wiping them against my thigh. In a flash both of her hands are cupping my face, pulling my lip between hers, biting and sucking at my mouth as I drag my nails up and down her back while she straddles my waist. She drags her tongue across my swollen, aching lip and kisses me deeply as she sighs a contented breath into my mouth, lowering herself to me, shivering when her clit accidently rubs against my hip bone as she slides off to my side. I run my hands over her back, tug her close to me and kiss her forehead as she burrows her head into my neck. Then I turn onto my side so I can face her, nudging her nose with mine to lift her head so I can look at her.

"I want to know everything I can about you." The words come out slow and deliberate, like liquid from my lips to hers. She closes the space between us with a chaste kiss, nodding her head, closing her eyes. I rub my thumbs along her cheek as I cradle her face in my hands, draping my leg across hers and snuggling close to her. Her eyes flicker open, long lashes fluttering against my thumb; dark, sad green eyes stare back at me. I'm surprised; after all we just shared to see a lingering sadness there. I know now that she burrowed her head and closed her eyes to hide it, I can feel her apprehension. I can see her trying to build walls up between me and whatever she is trying to hide. "Quinn…" my brow is furrowed as I tilt her face up to me, forcing her to look me in the eye. "I need you…baby, please…" it comes out in a pleading whisper as I see her eyes well with tears, lips quiver and tremble as she tries to pull her face out of my hands and turn away.

I'm hurt. I'm angry. I'm sad; no, I'm devastated. I tighten my grip and keep her face in my hands as she closes her eyes, tears escaping silently. Her hands are at my chest, pushing gently before closing into loose fists and clutching at nothing between us. She shudders again, but this time from pain, not pleasure as she whimpers and curls into me, letting her tears out with the breath she has been holding. I pull her into me, wrapping all my limbs around her to protect her. I'm not sure what happened; we were having a vulnerable, intimate exchange after I saw Jesus from that earth shattering orgasm, and now she's crying. Did I hurt her? Did I do something wrong? Latent anxiety is tearing through me, my heart is starting to race.

She's shaking; quaking maybe is more suited for this situation, like her body is trying to swallow up her feelings and pain but it can't do it without showing its own weakness. She's silent with her tears, occasional gasps, but quiet. I think in the moment that this is the worst kind of crying. The crying that is so intense and painful that you couldn't stop it if you tried but even the thought of crying out loud in anguish is too much to bear. The hurt is so much that all you can do is be silent, and watch it unfold, because there is nothing to stop it once it begins. Because in this moment no hugs, or kisses, or _love_ will solve it. Nothing will make it better. It just has to be what it is, pain and silence and tears.

So, I wait for her. I stroke her hair and kiss her head and hold her until the quaking slows. I hold her until her breaths are even and the gasping stops. I shut my own anxiety and insecurities away because I know what it's like to cry so hard you can't make a sound. I know because before I met Quinn that's how all my days felt. Like I was ghosting through my existence, fulfilling the requirements to remain socially acceptable and amicable but not really feeling anything. No physical connection to anyone or anything. I sectioned myself off emotionally with everyone. I can see that now, I can see what I haven't had with others since I've found what I have with Quinn. But what is it? What do I "have" now that I didn't have before?

She provides the answer before I have a chance to think about it anymore, she breathes almost silently against my neck. "I love you."

...

I think my heart stopped beating. I know I stopped breathing. I can hear the rush of my pulse in my ears and every other tiny sound that occurs around me in a deafening roar. It feels like a hundred years pass before either one of us moves or says a thing. And then the most unexpected thing happens… I laugh. Laugh and breathe in deeply and lean back to look at her tear-streaked face. I lean back to see all of her: pleading green eyes, pink flushed lips, tussled blond hair, perfectly tanned skin, curled in to my side. I laugh and look deeply into her eyes, smiling, and whisper, "Good…because I've loved you since the moment you kissed me."

Her eyes widen, brightness spreads across her face and she leans forward, hands no longer loose fists at her chest holding her together, now they cup my face and pull my lips to hers. She kisses me like it will be the last time we will ever kiss this way. I feel every ounce of pain and fear slip out of my body in this moment, because I love her. I understand why the words burned before, why I couldn't breathe properly without the thought or presence of her. I love her because she is everything I have ever needed and wanted and didn't know existed. And she loves me back.

We kiss quietly, tenderly, slowly enjoying every piece of each other we have shared. She sniffles back tears now, but they don't seem to weigh as much as before. I run my thumb under her eyes and wipe away the salty streaks. My own eyes feel tired, like I've been crying for days. I must have at some point started to weep too because Quinn kisses my cheek and I can feel the wetness there. I stroke her head and brush her hair out of her face. Her fingers dance along my cheek, under my jaw, tickling my skin. I push her gently on to her back and lean over her, reaching behind her for the washcloth and water bowl. I dab the cloth in the now-cold water and gently wipe the salt away from her face, kissing her skin after I clean it, soothing it the best I can. She looks tired, but seems happy.

I'm…at peace. I feel content in this moment, cleaning her, touching her, watching her face and eyes adjust to all that has happened. I am here in this moment, present, more than I have ever been present for anything else in my entire life. I put down the cloth and lower myself to her, kissing her lips softly before whispering against them, "I, just…so much…I…" She interrupts me with a deep, wet kiss.

"You make me feel so much. It scares me. I love you and it scares me," she says quietly, breaking our kiss but remaining close. "I want you to know everything about me, but it scares me."

"I know what you mean. I've, never felt this way before…about anything. And I'm sorta terrified," I blush and chuckle, leaning in to peck her lips again.

"Okay."

"Okay?"

"Yeah, we'll figure it out."

"I can handle that, good. Okay. Great. I love you." I smiled again; I liked hearing myself say that.

"I love you too. Hey, babe?"

"Yeah?"

"Can we get off the table? My back is starting to hurt…" she winced as she moved her legs beneath me.

I laughed and peeled myself off of her, hopping down to the floor stiffly. The floor was cold against my bare feet; in fact, everything was cold now that I wasn't pressed against her naked body. I grabbed my shirt and pulled on my pants, helping Quinn slip off the table and stretch. I tossed her tank top to her and swatted her butt gently as I pulled the blanket off the table. We moved the fruit bowls and dishes to the kitchen, sampling berries and chocolate, playfully swiping of whipped cream on nose tips, kissing it off lips. She wrapped her arms around my waist as I rinsed out the bowls at the sink, kissing my neck, telling me about herself: her favorite color is green, but only in small doses and particular hues, because it makes her eyes look great. She usually sleeps in the nude, out of habit after showering because she prefers to exercise at the end of the day to help her relax (I inserted a lewd sexual reference here that was rewarded/punished by light biting of my ear lobe). Her favorite ice cream is mint chocolate chip, but only if it's white, because even though it's her favorite color, green ice cream freaks her out. Growing up she played flute (not well) and got into sports because she "had a lot of pent up sexual frustration" (insert inappropriate comment here). She injured her knees after a "transition year of idiocy" in which she tried to run/jog/hike/master pilates and beat her body into submission through competitive league softball and weekend sports after a bad break up. She loves Thai food and hates fried things. Her favorite day of the week is Tuesday, no particular reason why, although recently she found more reasons to like Tuesdays and now Thursdays too (insert blush and shy smile). Her relationship with her father is a rocky one; the topic is skimmed over quickly, and obviously not something she is willing to share just yet. Quinn's mother lives in New York City with her stepfather, a nice enough guy, bookish and nerdy.

"What about you? I'm tired of talking about me." She nips the shell of my ear, turning me slowly to face her.

"Hmm, that's too bad, I could listen to you talk all day," I lean forward, kissing her sweetly.

"You are very charming, you know that?" She giggles and leans away from my kiss, almost shy.

"Good, that was my angle. I'm glad it's working." I smile smugly and resume pursuit of her lips.

"I mean it. Tell me something about you that I don't know yet." She pouts slightly, resisting my advances.

"Well, I've never been someone's dessert before." I wink seductively and wrap my arms around her waist. "I've also never had someone help me bathe before…" I kiss along her jaw, letting my tongue dance lightly against her skin.

"Tell me more…" she purrs, tipping her head back, exposing more of her neck.

"And I've never been this close to someone so beautiful before. Eyes like emeralds, a mouth than makes grown men weep…" I hum against her throat, fingers caressing up her back. "You've got the most beautiful lips I have ever seen."

I can feel her cheeks flush with color as she presses her face against mine before turning to reconnect our lips. She smiles bashfully throughout the kiss, gently nipping and pulling away so I have to chase her down. A yawn breaks up our game, as the time again announces its presence to us. We finish tidying the kitchen before trudging to the bathroom to get ready for bed. Minutes later we slip under the sheets, naked, tired and happy. I roll to my side and she spoons up behind me, kissing my neck softly and whispering in my ear, "I love you."

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**OMG. Aren't they the best? Love them girls. :)**


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